Letting go:
I'm running away from nothing, nothing is chasing me and yet I am still running. All i see is a big red shape pulsating through my brain, and i can smell blood. It started as a nightmare a week ago. I dreamt that i was killed and out of my blood rose a red monster, my once beating heart now blue and cold in the centre. That was when i first ran. Never before in my whole life had i run, forever confined to a wheel chair since i was one and the car accident, my legs were crushed when I flew out of the car window and the car fell on them.
Last night the dream revisited me, haunting me, challenging me to run again, the sounds were muffled as though my ears had fallen asleep but i heard a huge bang as two cars collided, then one final crash as the car fell, then redness. I woke up sweating and full of rage, like the monster, and then I started running.
I wake up, it has all been a dream, I sigh in disappointment and relief. Now i can't run again, and yet somehow i feel like i can, the red monster is still here, but hiding now. That dream was so vivid, i had memories, memories i knew were real, and yet they weren't, suddenly i collapse and sink back into my bed.
And now I am back, and this time I know it is real. And suddenly, I know what I am running from. I stop despite my intense fear. This is going to hurt. And now I see it, the red monster, gaining on me, closing in. Bang it hits, and so does the car, I fly out and in a flash my legs are lost once more. Blood soaks the ground as steadily as morning dew.
Sunlight pours through the window, the photo I keep beside me of my mum and dad ripples, and then disappears with the wind.
