A/N: Technically this is Axel and Saïx, but they're so new to the Organization that they still prefer Lea and Isa and use those names in their heads.
Lea wasn't used to being cold. Normally his inner spark - his mischievous flare, his mom sometimes called it - kept him burning bright and warm. So the miserable, cold emptiness ate him from the inside out, like he'd swallowed an iceberg. He'd been able to keep it at bay for a while, when Xemnas had grandly proclaimed their new names, when Xigbar had given them the "grand tour," when Lexaeus had shoved their spotless, shining new weapons into their hands... all Lea could do was wonder how long the deadly metal would stay that way. Spotless. Guiltless... How long it would be before he had to take something with it that couldn't be returned...?
The thoughts ran circles in his head, leaving icy footprints wherever they went. The greywashed blankets on his new beds couldn't warm him; if anything, they only sucked away whatever warmth he might have once had. So he curled up on top of them instead, wrapping his arms around his knees, but it still didn't help... his teeth chattered, his arms broke out in goosebumps under the sleeves of the shell of a black coat encasing his shell of a body...
What do I do... Isa, what did we get ourselves into...?
As if to answer his mental question, a soft knock rapped on his door, jolting him out of his fetal position. Vexen had said they weren't supposed to be out of bed after curfew, scaring him with stories of monsters prowling the castle. He couldn't tell if they were real or exaggerated, but this place was scary enough when all the lights were on. He had no intention of sneaking around in the dark and possibly running into those creepy zipper-faced monsters... Dusks, right? They seemed a little less scary with a name.
He tiptoed to the door, wishing it had a peephole. Of course, no one had ever not looked like an axe murder through a peephole, so maybe that was for the best. Before he could scare himself any more, he flung it open.
Isa jumped a foot in the air, but Lea just breathed a giant, laughing sigh of relief, pulling his best friend into his room.
"Come on, man, don't scare me like that." Lea laughed, feeling maybe just a little bit of warmth creep back into his heartless chest cavity.
"Scare you?" Isa glared, but he couldn't help cracking a smile, too. Heh, Lea would give up sea-salt ice cream if there was ever a day his best friend could stay mad at him.
"Yeah! For all I knew you could've been one of those Dusk things." Lea shivered. "So what are you doing here? Vexen said-"
Isa raised an eyebrow. "Since when do you care about the rules?"
"Uh, since breaking them almost got us killed." Kind of did get us killed... Lea thought, flopping back on his bed, where Isa sat down beside him. "Since when do you not care about the rules?"
"Since... I can't... I can't take it." Isa's head drooped, his voice dropping to a low whisper. "This castle, this darkness... it's so cold... I-I thought it might be better if I..."
"If you what?"
"If I... weren't alone," he admitted, not meeting his friend's eyes.
"Sh-shut up, Isa," Lea muttered, looking away too. "You're gonna make all the others think we're gay." He didn't admit that he'd had the same thought himself, but had been too scared to try and find his friend's room in the dark.
"Sorry to ruin your blooming reputation," he replied sarcastically, sighing. "I only thought you might feel the same about this castle, but I suppose I was wrong to make assumptions."
"N-no! Isa..." Lea sat up, slinging an arm around his friend's shoulders. "I was just kidding. C'mon, if you go get your pillows and blankets I bet we can make a wicked awesome fort."
A little half-smile returned to the blue-haired teen's face. "Are you ever going to grow up?"
"Heh, not 'til they make me."
XXX
It was a pretty sweet blanket fort. Maybe not their coolest ever, but under the circumstances, it was still pretty awesome. Lea's new "chakrams" felt light enough when he had to hold them, but when they were holding the corners of the blankets in place, they were heavy enough to keep them from slipping. Isa's claymore served as the pole that kept the fort from caving in in the middle.
"Heh, looks like these things are useful for something," Lea joked about their weapons. Isa shifted uncomfortably, like he didn't want to look at his claymore.
"I still don't like them."
"Hey, they'll help us kill the Heartless, right? That's what matters."
"I suppose..." Isa sat crosslegged, holding his pillow tight against his chest.
"Don't worry about it," Lea tried to help him relax. Too bad they didn't have any video games to take their mind off the present, or anything to do at all, really. They used to take turns telling ghost stories, but under the circumstances, that might hit a little too close to home. He wracked his mind to come up with something. "So, uh... does your head feel better yet?" Maybe it was still a sensitive topic, but he couldn't help being curious.
"...Mostly." Isa gingerly touched the X-shaped scar on the bridge of his nose. "Those potions are a miracle of modern medicine."
"Yeah. Too bad we didn't have them sooner," Lea mumbled, then remembered he didn't want to depress his friend any further. It was his self-proclaimed job to be the light one, the comic relief. "Hey, what do you think of our new names, Saix?"
Isa winced at the name. "Don't call me that, Axel."
He laughed, nudging his friend with his elbow. "What were they thinking? It sounds like an Axe made out of Sighs. I mean, I know you sigh a lot..."
"Well, at least you don't sound like you have a girl's name anymore," Isa teased back.
"Hey! Lea is a perfectly manly name, thank you very much!" He pouted. "I mean, I spent all that time trying to get people to remember it, and now everyone's going to call me Axel? My life's work has been ruined."
That managed to drag a chuckle out of Isa. "I thought your life's work was getting us both into trouble."
"Heh..." Lea shook his head. Unfortunately his friend was all too right. "Well, I succeeded at that..."
"Lea."
He glanced up a little, only to find Isa's green eyes locked on his. He wasn't smiling anymore.
"It wasn't only your fault. The Heartless would have gotten to us even if we hadn't been in the castle."
"Yeah, but-"
"But we can't change anything, Lea. Nothing. All we can do is do our best to get our hearts back."
It was a relief to know Isa forgave him... but he still wasn't sure he could forgive himself. But he tried not to show that, because Isa was right. All they could do was move forward. "Guess I've got a new life's work, then."
Isa smiled a little. "We both do. But I still have my old one, too."
"Oh yeah?" Lea raised his eyebrows. "And what's that?"
"To keep your reckless self out of trouble."
"Hey!" Lea shoved him playfully, but he couldn't help laughing.
That was the way it always had been - Lea running headlong into trouble, Isa always there to bail him out. It was a pretty good system, but it still hadn't been enough. Not this time.
And that was why, this time, things were going to be different. Think first, then act. Not always expect Isa to be there to mop up after him.
No. This time, he was going to be smarter.
Don't worry, Isa. This time, I'll protect you, too.
XXX
"Heh heh heh. Aren't you kiddos too cute."
Xigbar's voice didn't awaken the snoring boys, who had fallen asleep in their blanket fort.
"Too bad cuteness won't help you here." He summoned a camera, snapping a picture. "But hey, since I'm a nice guy, I guess I'll give you two a little more beauty rest."
Xigbar shut the door, strolling back down the hallway and tossing the camera up and down. It was always nice to get some good blackmail while the newbs were still newbs. Maybe it would come in handy some day.
