Entry 1- May 2nd, 2020

I don't expect you to forgive me. I can't even forgive myself. If Sammy was here he would be saying it's not my fault, that what happened can't be blamed on me. But everything that went down was because I wasn't paying attention. I should have known it was going to happen. I should have seen it coming.

It's harder today than it was a few days ago. It's Sammy's birthday today. I got some stupid cake with a clown on it, just to rile him up. It's sitting in the fridge right now untouched. I can't bring myself to eat it. Garbage sounds more appetizing than his cake.

Anyway, tell Sam Happy Birthday for me Bobby, would ya? He doesn't like being alone.