Go to Sleep

AUTHOR: Angelhart
GENRE: romance/drama
STORY: one shot
STATUS: complete
RATING: PG13/K+
DISCLAIMER: InuYasha ©2000 Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan - Yomiuri TV - Sunrise
All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.

SUMMARY: Kagome finds herself being held by Inuyasha when she wakes up. Using his body and the fire rat to keep her warm in the night. He had never done such act before and it makes her think about the future. About her and him together.

Cover artwork created by the wonderful artist invisibleninja12

You can find the original piece and a link to more of her artwork on my DeviantART page

[angelhart79]


Kagome reminiscent how they came to be this way. She was snuggled warm in his fire rat robe. He was lying behind her, his strong arm around her. Protectively.
Then she remembered.

She had been wounded in the last battle. Her right arm. She felt a thickness under her uniform sleeve. Bandages. Must have been Sango, she mused. Had she fainted?

She remembered being cold somewhere in the night. Her body shivering to keep warm. Now she was however as snug as a bug.

Somewhere during the night he had placed the fire rat over her body. It surprised her that the proximity he usually kept was now so altered. He was actually holding her in an embrace as well. Not only using the fire rat to keep her warm but the warmth of his body as well. She could feel it radiating through the red fur.

She did not remember the moment he had moved from his spot against one of the shrine walls to cover her body with the fire rat and lay down beside her. He rarely slept like any normal human being. Most of the time he slept sitting upright. Tessaiga resting against his shoulder.

The sword was lying in front of her now. The hand of the right arm that embraced her holding the sheath in a tight grip.
She was afraid to move. Afraid to wake him up and to never feel like this again. So warm, so safe. So loved...

This position was so intimated. The most intimate they ever allowed them both to be so it seemed. His fuzzy ears tickling in her neck as they twisted occasionally. Probably hearing something outside that was far beyond her hearing range.

She had pictured this to happen in more than one occasion. A wish. To be asleep in his arms like this. He was two sided. Like a coin. In more ways than one.
She had figured out that because he was half human and half demon he aged differently. Not forgetting the fact he had been sealed for fifty years. He had many years of life experience but the demon side of him was still a teenager somehow. Acting reckless, arrogant, impulsive. His human side seemed older. Caring, loving. He could say the stupidest things acting so childless and surprise her next by doing something like... like this...

When she was just trying to cope with the thought she could never be the one he really loved and that they could never be together he did something to stir her feelings again. Making her confused once more.

He seemed stuck in a web of emotions. She blamed it on Naraku. The demon who had toyed with their emotions for his own pleasure. And remained to do so even now.

The friendship that was between them started out to be more but the new feelings were unimaginable fragile. Both were aware of the everlasting wall that was between them.

Kikyo...

It seemed so unfair. Each time Kikyo hurt his feelings or disappeared from his life he allowed himself to feel more for her.

But then Kikyo would reappear. Pulling on the thread of fate that bound the two of them together.

Fate... How could she compete with that?

Her heart was jealous, a dark spot that clouded her innocence. She wondered if that would eventually become a hinder if they had to purify the jewel.

But it was normal to feel jealousy, was it not? To her Kikyo was the other woman. His first love. And first love was known for the permanent mark it left behind. A bond that could never be broken. Not even by death.

And Kikyo had found a way to cheat death by borrowing the souls of others. Remaining in this world even still. Her intentions not clear.

That she didn't like Kagome was obvious. But what did she want with Inuyasha? First it seemed she wanted him dead. But as Naraku's deception became clear her hatred turned to the man that had deceived them and had played games with their love. Both Inuyasha and Kikyo were drawn to one another. It seemed they had unfinished business together. Kagome was only worried about her part in all that.

Over time she had grown to love Inuyasha. A love more than friendship. Her friends had told her he felt the same for her. Yet he couldn't act upon those feelings out of guilt. For Kikyo. His heart unable to make a choice in the matter.

Kagome feared that perhaps the choice was up to her. This was not her world anyway. She lived in the future. Her fear that, although her heart desired his love, it was just not meant to be.

After the fight with Naraku would be over he would stay and live with Kikyo. She would return home…

It made her really sad when she thought of not ever seeing him again.

She could feel him stirring behind her. Waking up. She quickly dried off her tears, stroking them away from her face, although she knew she could not so easy brush off the salty scent they left behind for him to sense.

"Kagome?"

She almost fell like crying again. His voice so full of concern. And love... She could hear it.

"Are you all right?"

She nodded. Not trusting her voice sure it would tremble and betray her she just nodded.

His hand was in her hair. Claws o so carefully stroking away the locks that were covering her face.

These were the moments she longed towards their relentless quarrels and bickering. It was easier to forget the webbed triangle off love they were in when they argued.

"Kagome?"

"Just a nightmare," she lied, tears burning behind her eyes again. For a moment she expected him to scold at her in disbelieve. She had no doubt her voice had not been steady enough to be convincing.

Silence. It seemed it lasted forever and she realized she had been holding her breath for air escaped her lips as he finally spoke.

"Go to sleep." The tone in his voice tender, yet demanding.

She could feel him lay down again.

He knew. She was certain he could sense what was going inside her mind. She often wondered if that same battle off emotions kept him awake at night occasionally.

Muscles in the arm wrapped around her waist tensed, the appendage pulling her more against him.

It took a while for her to relax again. Pushing all the thoughts away, back to that corner of her mind so they could haunt her again at fragile moments like this. She closed her eyes wishing she could banish them forever.
She knew he was still awake. He would not fall asleep before she would find a peaceful slumber again. Always protecting her.

It felt like a deathtrap. Her devoted love for him that with the expanding time grew even stronger than the fear of losing him. And strange enough not the most rational fear. He was a half-demon. The Beads of Subjugation and the Tessaiga keeping him in control. She had seen the darker side of him. The one with the endless lust for death and bloodshed. A power that could consume him. The side she knew to be wise to fear as a human.

Was she so masochistic that she could have possibly fallen in love with her own death?

One way or the other she would lose him eventually. Fate would be cruel. It just had still to decide how to penalty her.

She could lose him to Kikyo.

Or she could find herself trapped again in her own world after the final battle.

Or... He could lose his sanity and become the full demon he had desired to be. Free of restrains, but also free of remorse and pity. And the memory of her would be fading as the need to kill and shed blood would take over. He would than take her heart once more. Tearing through her ribcage with his sharp claws as she had seen him do in battle with other demons. Ripping it out of her body.

But… it was his already to begin with, wasn't it?

Age...

If they were to be together she would lose him as her body would wither away due the effects of time. The lifespan of a human was so short. Love could be equally cruel like that.
He nuzzled her neck gently. The loving gesture braking of the thoughts in her mind. A tingle went down her spine and she heard a short chuckle behind her as his demon senses obviously had noticed the change in her body, due to his attentions. Yet neither dared to proceed into more intimate action.

"Sleep," his voice whispered softly, his warm breath tickling her ear.

She dared to turn around in his embrace. He was startled by it and pulled away. His left hand supporting his head, he looked at her puzzled.

Her big brown eyes were just looking at him. They held a sad expression. In their depth so many 'what if' questions visible.

Then his right hand was on her cheek moving to the back of her head, disappearing into her hair. Her eyes closing as he pushed her face closer to his. Gently he pressed a kiss on her forehead.

As he let go of her she opened her eyes. Her cheeks were lightly flushed and her mouth slightly open. She had expected him to kiss her elsewhere, he humoursly mused.

He had to admit to be tempted to kiss those warm lips. But where would it lead to? Both their lives were 500 years apart. He did, however, have feelings for her. More than he would ever admit to anyone. Even to her...

This was however not the time to act on such things. There was Naraku who seemed to feed on their weaknesses. He knew she was his weakness. Naraku did not. He wanted to keep it that way for as long as possible for that demon was going to use it against him. He would use her. Hurt her. It angered him to think about that.

He had sent her away before, but she came back. She was relentless in that. And in fact, he loved her for it. She stayed for him. So he wanted her to be safe.

He gave her a genuine smile and she turned around again, letting him spoon her once more. He moved his right arm over her body again, making sure the fire rat was pressed against her, his hand grabbing the Tessaiga that laid in front of her once more. Both of them keepers of his sanity. He had come to learn that the real demon he craved to be, wasn't his to control. It was a foul beast that hungered for death and bloodshed.

"Kagome," he whispered softly enjoying the rhythmic sound of her breathing and the thrum of her steady heartbeat.

Was this love? To be held in such way? To hear him speak her name in such husky whisper. If it was, she wanted to feel like this forever. Hoping for fate to intervene. If we're meant to be together...

She decided to enjoy this fragile moment now. She dared to cuddle against him more since he was still lying beside her.

"Hold me," she heard herself whisper.

He did, pulling her body closer to his chest. The warmth of his body enveloping her. His face buried itself in her neck. She could feel him breathing in her scent through his nose, before he laid his head to rest.

Go to sleep...

* * The End * *


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Arigato Gozaimashita