Disclaimer I do not own lemmings or any of this shit that I wrote about.
There was a lemming, his name was Bill. There is a special way he died. It all started when his friend,
Crunchbutt, was eating a hamburger. Bill screamed
"What the fuck Ass hole!!! Thats my hamburger!"
"It ain't yours any more bioch! Did this come with a Dr. dew?" yelled Crunchbutt.
Grimly Bill said "No."
At this time they both started to think of how they can screw each other over today. After moments of silence Bill finally said
"Lets go to the lemming trap. I heard a dumb ass was going to go for the cheese."
"O.K." replied Crunchbutt.
As they were heading to the trap they heard distant screams.
"lets go check out who's screaming. If we save her we might get laid." said crunchbutt.
"I'm not going to do a threesome with you and a slut. Let's go anyway." said Bill.
As they walk they see a chick playing a game on her phone. they think to themselves, WTF.
The weird chick screamed "My dumb ass snake bit its own fucking tail."
crunchbutt said " It's O.K., we know people that can help."
She finally notices them when he said that. She turned to them and said
"Damn it I lost. That amounts to eight days of masturbation. My name is Kira will you masturbate with me."
"If we do will we have to masturbate seeing swords or what." said Crunchbutt.
"We can have a threesome if you like." said Kira.
"FUCK NO!" said Bill.
"Fine. let's just see if the dumb ass is going to jump in the trap." said Kira.
"How did you know about that." Crunchbutt said curiously.
"It's on that bill board." replied Kira.
"O.K." they said together.
As they were walking, they came to a busy road. Cars were just going everywhere really fast.
Bill asking, "before I die, where do you work?... ... ... ... ... Kira. Kira ... ... ... KIRA."
"I work as a hoe. happy now, you made me lose." yelled Kira.
They waited for an opening, and ran like hell. they could see the bar on the other side. They hear splat, but don't turn to see who it was.
They made it to the to the other side. At least two of them do. they see a pile of Crunchbutt on the road.
Kira says,"wanna make love on his dead body. wait do you have protection."
(Bill says) "who needs condoms."
thats when crunchbutt says, "RETARD!"
(Bill says) "hurry up and die prick."
(Crunchbutt)"O.K.. hurrg-blah
