Hey guys I own nothing and this is a personal one with me. When I lost my brother alot of what Bella said and felt was me. So I hope you enjoy. Please review.

To all my loyal readers of Music Of The Heart. I am so sorry its taking me so long. I should have the next chapter up this week. I'm changing it up a bit. I'm gonna Do more of EPOV than I do Bella. For some reason. I can start a story with BPOV but I can never finish but if I do a EPOV I can finish it. Make sense? If not sorry. So anyway I should have that up to you soon. Again I'm sorry.

Thanks to the best Beta ever. Kim you are the greatest. Now on to the story

Shawna


Makes You Stronger

Sitting here now looking at the head stone, I still can't believe something so horrible could happen to my family. As they lowered him into the ground my body once numb seemed to take on a life of its own as I found myself on my knees sobbing, begging him to not leave me.

Jake wasn't just my older brother he was my best friend. He was the one who always stuck by my side. I can hear my poor mother's uncontrollable sobs as my father tried to sooth her breaking heart. Me? Well my world has no meaning. My sun has set.

I felt arms come around me and I turn my head looking into emerald green. Edward Cullen. He was Jake's best friend. So therefore he was a close friend of mine. Edward looked into my eyes and I could see the pain of losing Jake was causing him. "Come on Bells."

I tried to move, God knows I did. But I couldn't. "I can't Edward." He picked me up and sat down in my chair with me on his lap. I was almost controlled until they started putting the dirt on him and I freaked and started screaming. "NO!... Jake please come back…please….I'll leave your music alone. I'll do whatever just don't leave me." That's all I remember and that's when everything went black.

It's been 2 weeks since Jake's funeral. Edward had stayed with me for 2 days until he had to go back to school. I haven't done anything. I wasn't eating, wasn't drinking, I showered when my mom got my dad to put me in the tub. I was in such a catatonic stage. I never slept. I was just there.

I heard a knock at my door. I didn't answer and they knocked again. "Either come in or go away." I mumbled. Not really caring what they did, it wasn't like I was going to talk to them anyway. I heard the door open a sigh,"Bells." Said the most warming voice.

I moved my eyes to see Edward standing in the doorway. I was starting to breathe hard. The tears trying to well up and me begging them not to fall. They seemed to have a mind of their own for they started and wouldn't stop. "Oh my Bells." I then felt Edward lay down behind me and hold me as sobs took over my body.

I woke a few hours later and was still cuddled with Edward. He hadn't left me. "Edward… Help me." I whispered to him. "Sweet Baby Bells, that's what I'm here for. I wasn't taking it well either and I knew you would take it the hardest. I felt like I had to come back. I knew you weren't in a good place." I turned around and faced him. We just stared in each other's eyes no words needing to be said.

That was the first day of many where I got back to my old self. It was also the first day I fell in love with Edward Cullen.

Edward called and checked on me three times a day. We would laugh and talk and reminisce about stupid stuff Jake did.

It's been 2 months since Jake passed away. I was sitting on the front porch swing reading Wuthering Heights again when I heard a car come up the gravel drive, but just figured it was my mother since she had to run to the bank. "Hey Mom." I called out. When there was no sound I looked up and froze. There standing on my porch was Edward. "Edward?" I breathed out. He gave me that beautiful crooked smile.

"Beautiful Bella." I was up and in his arms being swung around in two seconds flat. I didn't even trip! I hugged him as close as I could get. He sat me back down and kissed my forehead. "Not that I'm complaining but what are you doing here?"

We sat down on the swing and he put his arm around me as I laid my head in his lap. I looked up at him and he looked down at me happiness shining in his green emerald eyes. "Well I hadn't been home in over a month. I missed my parents, you, Uncle Charlie, and Aunt Rea." I smiled he had been calling mom and dad, aunt and uncle for years now. "Well we all missed you too."

"There is something I need to do and I wanted to know if you would go with me." I knew what he wanted so I just nodded.

After a quite ride, we arrived at the cemetery. I lead him to Jake. I kissed the headstone like I do ever week. "Hey Jakey, I brought a visitor this time. I'll leave you two to talk. Love you booger!" I murmured.

I looked at Edward who had a single tear running down his cheek. I wiped it off his face gently. "You can do it. It's okay." I took his hand and brought it to the stone.

I went to stand back but Edward's broken voice stopped me. "Bella… please don't leave me I need you."

I was back at his side as he collapsed in tears. We all had our breakdowns but I guess Edward hadn't had his yet. Come to think of it I don't think he's been here since the funeral. "Jake…man…I can't….I'm sorry." I listened as Edward bore his heart and soul to Jake and apologizing for not coming sooner.

That was the day I fell over the edge and knew I was done for. I knew I would never want another man than Edward but I also knew he didn't see me that way. It would never happen for me, but I would never stop loving him. And that was okay.

I was sitting on the barstool with Esme, Edward's mother, talking about the next charity event details. I helped her with every event over the past 2 years. The phone rang and Esme excused herself to get it.

A few minutes later she came back in the kitchen with tears rolling down her face. I jumped up,"What's wrong?" She broke out into sobs and all she got out was "Edward." And I collapsed. I couldn't breathe. What happened to him? Was he okay?

I grabbed the phone and called Carlisle. He told me that Edward was being rushed to Forks Memorial after being in a car accident. "Now Bella, please calm down I can't have you passing out. I need you to be strong for him. He's in stable condition as of right now, but I need you to get Esme up and ready to get down here."

I gave Esme a cold wash cloth to wipe her face and hope that it would calm her down some. We arrived at the hospital fifteen minutes later. We didn't care who tried to stop us; we were getting to our Edward.

Carlisle was in the waiting room when we got there and Esme was in his arms in a second. I stood back and looked at the floor not wanting to intrude on their moment. He was there son.

I saw feet stop in front of me and as I looked up Carlisle put his arms around me. "He's asking for you."

I pulled back and wiped the tears. "Esme you go. I can wait." She smiled and came up to me. "No baby girl…go. He wants you." I looked at both of them making sure. Then I took off with Carlisle yelling "206" behind me.

I stopped outside his door and took a deep breath. I quietly opened the door and let myself in and turned to shut it quietly. I was stalling turning around because I knew I was going to lose it. I took another deep breath telling myself that he was okay and that everything was going to be alright.

"Bella" That amazingly velvety voice called out to me. I turned around and gasped. He was sitting up in the bed with a few scratches on his face and his leg in a cast and his left arm in a sling. I walked through the blurriness of my unshed tears. "My Bella….don't cry. I'm okay."

That's all it took the tears I tried so hard to hold back came out with full force. It threw me back to the memories of Jake. "Oh Edward." I gently hugged him. I heard him sniff my hair and squeeze me tighter. "I'm so glad your okay. I can't lose you."

"Bella, I have to tell you something. It's been killing me not to… I love you. I've loved you since that time you tripped and fell in the mud where me and Jake were wrestling. Seeing you laugh and jump on Jake and screa, 'The mud demon got me! Help!' I knew… I knew I wanted you. I can't go another day without telling you. I want you to be mine…. I want to make you laugh when you want to cry. Bella, I want to be your everything." He had tears in his eyes as he spoke the words I have waited so long to hear.

I placed my hands on Edward's face cupping him, "Oh Edward… I love you and I have loved you for years, but I didn't realize it til you came home to help me when Jake died. You're the reason I'm who I am today. If it weren't for you I don't know where I would be." I wiped the tears away.

The smile that overtook his face was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I planned to keep it there.

I leant down and kissed Jake's head stone. "Hey brother, it's been a few weeks since I have been here and I know you know the reason and don't resent me for it. I miss you and I love you.

I believe it was all your doing to get me where we are today. Thank you Jakey. So I could not wait to introduce you to two additional family members. Jake, meet your nephew, Jacob Anthony Cullen, and your niece, Jaclyn Marie Cullen."

Edward leant down and kissed the head stone. "Jake man, I knew you were behind me and Bella getting together. I will never ever be able to tell you how much I love her and how I can't believe I was the lucky bastard that married her. She gave me two beautiful children. I'm asking that you watch over them and keep them safe. I love you man!"

I kissed my husband of two years and my babies of only six weeks feeling content at where my life has ended up. I can't help but think that losing Jake was what had to happen for me to have the perfect life that I have been blessed with. Yes, I miss him and would love for him to be here. But sometimes life throws you battles that you have no choice but to overcome, and it only makes you stronger in the end.


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