"Ashley, I'm frightened."
The words are as painful as a sword rammed through my gut. I hate that she's scared of me. Everywhere I look I see half remembered things. Elusive memories … half shadows… moments.
Some might say that this was a depressing place to grow up but I counted myself lucky. I had my very own fairy castle. The Little Mermaid lived in the basement and Beauty had her very own beast.
There was even a real bogeyman under my bed… I called him Harold.
I remember falling over, skinning my knees and the kisses that made it all better. Stories at bedtime, games of hide and seek... birthday parties. The pictures run through my head as if I'm reliving my life in his one instant.
Everything has been leading to this. This moment… this place… this decision. I look into the future and all I see is black. I want to scream at the Universe. It's too soon. There hasn't been enough of my life. It's not fair!
Will it hurt? The child inside me asks. But I'm not a child anymore. I have to be the grown up here, the one who makes everything better.
And suddenly I'm empty, exhausted and I realise that I have no place left to run. The end is inevitable. I want to say goodbye, to Will, to Henry… even to my father… but there's only the woman cowering in front of me. I see the monster I've become reflected in her eyes.
Death… it's not going to be so hard after all.
"Mom," I whisper.
And then I'm gone.
