DANGER MOUSE:
REMEMBER THE NAME
WRITTEN BY ZARIUS
Disclaimer: Danger Mouse (2015) and all trademarked characters are property of Fremantle Media and CBBC
It had been a day where bonding had bloomed on a battlefield...a rather grimy battlefield at that.
The Sqauwkencluck clan had almost reduced the city to ruin, and all for the sake of a nice clean abode. Mrs. Squawkencluck had transformed her husband into garbage guzzling trash monster, and it taken the genius of her daughter Professor The Professor, a deevolver device, and the courage and resolve of the world's greatest secret agent to revert him to restore him to normal.
Now, as Danger Mouse took to the streets to clean up the trail left behind by the monster, with a patented feather duster of all things, the Squawkenclucks and Penfold had retired to their family homestead to have brunch.
Penfold couldn't help but feel slightly left out as the brilliant boffins engaged in complicated conversations at the table. Quantum realities, hidden realities, realities that could be conceived in a lab, it was almost a little overwhelming for him.
Still, he chose to concentrate on the little things he had learned tod, things that he, as your average everyman agent assistant could relate to.
"So...Professor eh?" he said to Professor, interrupting their complex conversations.
"Yes Penfold, you've already made note of this a good few times now. My name's Professor, are you going to needle me all afternoon about it?" Professor replied.
"Oh I don't know, it just seems a bit...anti-climatic is all, like the writers couldn't come up with something more inspirational. It's like that Powerpuff Whatsits show where the Mayor went by the name Mayor. It was funnier in that show"
"Well, I hope you recognize that science is not to be laughed at" Professor replied.
"But it is ok to sneeze at it right? Because I remember when I got my mucus all over your pastry dishes once and you created bacterial minnows out of them within five hours or so"
"Creating sea life out of waste? You didn't tell me about that bit Professor" said Mrs. Squawkencluck. Professor blushed.
"Oh it was nothing Mum, I had a few off hours and Penfold was being a curious wee cat, so when he refused to blow his nose, I chose to spend my hours a bit creatively than just blowing my usual gasket at him" Professor explained.
"I don't think you should get so angry at him or DM, they're always trying their best to do right by the world using your inventions sweetheart" Mrs. Squawkencluck continued.
"Besides" she added "I couldn't help but notice Penfold was the first to be considerate of your feelings when I was lecturing you on making your inventions too complicated for Danger Mouse to try and utilize. He saw how glum you were, and encouraged that well-meaning mouse to use your liquefying missiles"
Professor looked across the table to Penfold, and gave him a smile. She sighed.
"That was awfully sweet of you" she said.
"Think nothing of it Professor" Penfold replied.
"Care to tell him anything else?" Professor's mother whispered in her ear.
"Mum, pipe down, you're not that good at whispering" Professor harshly replied.
"I know the way you are about him just from the way you word your reports to home about life at work, you focus just a wee bit too much on everything he does wrong in your company, it reminds me a bit of how I am with your dad"
"Cut. It. Out" Professor insisted.
"You know Professor...if it's all the same, your first name is far less awkward than my unfortunate middle one" Penfold revealed.
"Really? What is it?" Professor asked, curious.
"Oh I'd hate to donate this to science" Penfold said, "But if you were to insist..."
"I do" the Professor replied.
Penfold got up from his seat, walked over to Professor and whispered it into her ear.
She giggled and gave him another warm glance.
"Really Penfold? Those names aren't anywhere near as unfortunate, who's been telling you that?" Professor asked
"The Chief" Penfold said, twiddling his thumbs anxiously.
"Oh I should have figured" Professor remarked, "Don't worry about what he has to say, think about what I have to say instead...it's not the name that brings you good or bad fortune, it's the person attached to the name that does. If you ever feel the need to no longer conceal it, if you ever feel proud of it one day, then make it stand for something greater than the sum of its parts. Make it a name everyone understands. Make them remember it."
"Like how 'Professor' makes what you do easy to understand?" Penfold asked.
Professor rubbed his head gently with her right hand, "See, you're not THAT hard to figure out"
"And that's why he's such an easy attraction for you" her mother replied, making another poor go at whispering in her daughter's ear.
"MUM" Professor snapped.
