Do You?
Prologue: Dear Diary...

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Author's Note (please read!): Well, I wasn't going to have a prologue, but then I realized that in order for the beggining to make since, you need to know the backround info. I'll just let you know that I'm pretty much changing the WHOLE story, minus a few things. I want to give credit to Elizabeth Chandler for the idea and much of the story line. I chose the sport lacrosse because I live in Maryland and it's pretty much the only sport I know about. It's really big here. And, I do realize that it's the wrong season for lacrosse, but work w/ me here, alright? Um... I don't think there was anything else I needed to say, but if there is, I'll point it out later. OH ONE MORE THING. Abby doesn't die, okay? She plays a pretty important role... well, enjoy!


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September 5, 1997
Dear Diary,
Okay, I know what you're saying... since when does Joey Potter, tomboy extrodinare, keep a diary? Well, since I started high school... so, I guess, today. Yep, that's right. The "Three Musketeers" have started high school. Scary thought.
Speaking of which, Pacey and I had a long talk today. Weird, huh? Who knew that lame-brain Witter could even form a sentance, let alone have an actual adult conversation. Anyway, he said that he was afraid that high school would change everything so he wanted to hang out more. Something about a gut feeling he had... I don't know. I guess I tuned him out around there. Dawson was comming over...

Oops, got to go. Bessie's on a rampage. Problems with Bodie, maybe?...

cya



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September 6, 1997
Dear Diary,
Wow. Pacey really meant it when he said he wanted to be better friends. You know, he's actually not that bad...
Dawson was talking about trying out for lacrosse. Dawson? Lacrosse? Those words don't belond in the same sentance!

He also said Pacey was thinking about trying out. I think there's something in the water around here. It's turning their brains to mush!

Today we had an assembly about the different extra-curricular activites they offer. All of them looked prety dumb, except one. The Minute News. It's the CHS weekly newspaper... I"ve always wanted to be a journalist... They said they were looking for sports reporters and editors. Now, sports is DEFINATELY not my thing, but still... if I need to do sports, then I'll do it!

cya

p.s: One thing the speaker said at the assembly kind of caught my attention... "High school is a time of exploring yourself and others. Believe me, everything will change, whether you want it to or not..."

What a bunch of bull.



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September 13, 1997
Dear Diary,
God, Dawson and Pacey were serious about trying out! They're there right at this moment.
Can you believe CHS actually has a lacrosse team? I mean, that stuff's, like, big in Maryland or something. Not in Massachusettes!

Pacey and I have been spending so much time together. Even though he lives on the other side of town he still makes a point of walking me home everyday.

You know, there are a l ot of things about Pacey that I never noticed before. Like the way his smile kind of lights up his face. Hell, it lights up the room! And the way he walks. It's like he knows that he looks like some sort of Freshman God. Kinda scary. But, sweet at the same time.

God, I can't believe I'm saying all of this! I mean... it's Pacey!!

cya



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September 23, 1997
Dear Diary,
They did it. That's right. Dawson and Pacey both made the Junior Varsity lacrosse team. Can you believe it?
Here's another one for you: Guess who is the newest sports reporter-in-training? ME! I got the job. Now all I have to do is some research on sports... like, what they are.

Okay, I know this is totally out of the blue, but... I think I'm in love. Can you be in love at 14?

And, before you ask, it's not Dawson. It's... Pacey. God, this is weird. It's just... he makes me feel so... alive. Alive. What a great word.

Ugh. Look at me. I fall in love and I turn to puss.

Gotta go. The three of us are going out to celebrate our victories (along with a new-commer who moved in next door to Dawson. Jessica or Jennice or something.) I've got to figure out what to wear! (Don't say a word)

cya



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October 10, 1997
Dear Diary,
Pacey and Dawson had their first game today. And, guess what? THEY WON!!!! 15-11. Pacey played really great. At least, a lot of the freshman bimbo-blonde female population thought so...
Jealous? No, I'm not jealous. Of course not. Not in the least. You're crazy.

Well... okay. Maybe I'm a little jealous... but only a LITTLE TEENY TINY BIT, I swear.

So, I asked him to go out and celebrate (as friends), but he got pulled away by the team. So it was just Dawson and me and that girl I told you about. Her name is Jen and she's from New York. Apparently she had a reputation, but she's still extremely cool. We went to the Icehouse. I had fun.

Really, I did.

cya



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October 23, 1997
Dear Diary,
Pacey didn't walk me home today.
He didn't yesterday either.

He said he was busy. "You know, team stuff."

Funny how Dawson didn't mention anything going on.

Funny how Dawson never blows off a movie night to go to some junior's "housewarming party" that Jen says is just some excuse meaning "party. free beer". (of course, the movie nights are at his house, but that's beside the point.)

Gotta go.

cya



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October 25, 1997
Dear D,
We made our plans for Halloween at lunch today. We're probably the only freshman actually going, but hey, it's our last year to really hold on to childhood.
Anyway, the four of us (Jen only after much convincing from Dawson) are going as the Wizard of Oz characters. Jen's the scarecrow without the brain, Dawson's the cowardly lion, Pacey's the heartless tinman (**author's note** notice the characters i gave them... they work w/ my story.), and I'm Dorothy.

cya



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October 31, 1997
Dear D,
Pacey blew us off. The Varsity lacrosse team invited the JV team to a party. Dawson said he'd already made plans, but Pacey, of course, being Pacey, accecpted.
Doorbell just rang. Time for the early trick-or-treaters.

cya

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November 14, 1997
Dear D,
This is the last time I write in this diary. Pacey ended our friendship. I confronted him about his "absense" in the things that all of us used to do and to make a long story short, we got into a fight and he said, "Well, Jo, if that's the way you feel, then maybe our friendship isn't worth all the trouble." We stared at each other for what seemed like hours until he finally turned away.
I keep thinking about the look in his eyes. It was like this deep shade of blue that held so many emotions. Anger. Guilt. Frustration. Regret. Hope. Love? No. Definately not love...

He's practically a God at school now. Even Abby Morgan, the gossip queen who always looked down on him, is fawning all over him! And he's only on JV!

So, it was fun while it lasted. Diaries are for people to write down their feelings, but ever since Pacey walked away, I have none. Nothing to say. If this is the way love feels, then I never want to love again. Ever.

Changes suck.

cya,
Joey Potter

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Joey closed the diary, reached under her bed, and stored the book in a small box for good. Sitting on her bed facing her window, she heard the voices of high school guys. Hoping it was Pacey, she hopped out of bed to peer out the window. It was Pacey, but the guys with him definately weren't Dawson. It looked like a bunch of sophmores, juniors, and seniors. As they passed her house, Pacey looked over at Joey's window. Their gazes met, and for a second, Joey was hopeful. Please come over. Please come over. But, to her dissapointment, one of the guys tapped him on the shoulder getting his attention, and they walked past. I can't take this anymore. She walked back over to her bed, and, for the first time since her mom died, Joey Potter cried herself to sleep.



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