I do not own anything but the plot and Ethan. Stephanie Meyer owns the Twilight characters, settings, and plot. If this story resembles anyone or anything in real life it is simply a coincidence.
Anyways thanks for reading.
Chapter 1
B POV
I have had a serious crush on my best friend, Edward, since that faithful day in Freshman English. My parents had moved us to Forks, WA over the summer because my father had been offered the position of Chief of Medicine at the Fork General Hospital. Since I did not know anyone I got to class early and sat at the very back. Slowly the people filed in and just before the bell rang Edward walked in and he made his way to the seat next to me, which I found weird since back in high school I was not the prettiest girl nor was I the thinnest so it made no sense why a guy like Edward wanted to sit next to me. But he smiled and introduced himself and he complimented my t-shirt that said, "9 in the afternoon." I was surprised that he got the Panic at the Disco reference. We ended up talking all through class about our favorite bands and I learned we had a lot in common.
It was easy being friends with Edward and we quickly became best friends. High school went by and by senior year we were inseparable and could not deal with the idea of being separated so we made the decision to go to the same college so we both ended up going to Brown together. He majored in Journalism and I majored in Psychology.
Flash forward 10 years later and I was no longer the chubby girl, I had learned to do my hair and make up, and I now knew how to dress for my body type. I was not like most girls I had boobs and hips and I was okay with it. Also I was now a successful psychologist with a specialization in human sexuality at a psychology practice in Chicago and Edward was now a senior copywriter for the Chicago Sun Times. In the last 10 years we had each had our share of bad moments but we were always there for the one another. But our relationship was not always platonic, a couple of times over the years where we turned to each other for sexual gratification but each time I would end it when I felt like I was losing sight of it all. You see over the last 10 years I've been trying my hardest not to fall in love with my best friend. I always knew that I liked him but I did not want to be the girl in love with her best friend mostly because I knew that he would never see me the way I saw him.
Edward Cullen is a 10, he is gorgeous with his bronze sex hair, emerald green eyes, lick-able jaw, tall frame, and panty-dropping smile. And I, Bella Swan, am a solid 7 and I knew that a 10 never went for a 7. All his past girlfriends had been the complete opposite of me, thin, blue or green eyed, blonde, tall, and with the IQ of a nat. They all looked like Victoria Secret models while I looked like a model from the 50s. So I knew there was no reason to allow myself to develop feelings for him and get my hopes up that one day he would see me as something other than his friend, Bella that occasionally became his friend with benefits. By this point in our friendship I had pretty much resigned myself to the reality that Edward Cullen and I would only be friends and I had been trying to work on getting over my crush and just think of him as friend. So I allowed myself to be set up on date after horrible date by my friends, Rosalie and Alice.
They both work with me. Rosalie is my receptionist and she is currently working toward getting her master's in child psychology. Rosalie is a total knock out with beautiful blonde hair, ice blue eyes, and legs for days. But she also one of the best friends a girl could ever ask for. Alice is the only other female psychologist at my practice and she specializes in coping with traumatic events. Alice is barely 5 feet tall and resembles a pixie with her short hair, grey eyes, and elfish face. They have known about my crush on Edward for years now and have been trying to help me get over him by setting me up with every single guy they know that is available. I have yet to meet one that I click with but I am determined to forget about the possibility of Edward and so I keep going on dates hoping one will stick.
Currently, I am at a local coffee shop that is around the corner of our apartment building. Edward and I live across the hall from each other and have since we moved to Chicago to do our Master's at Northwestern. And we have been coming to this coffee shop ever since. It is just one of those places where you can do work, read, or just sit down and relax with a cappuccino. Edward and I have made a tradition of having Sunday brunch here. No matter what was going on in our lives we always had brunch together. I'm usually here before Edward since I run in the mornings and just meet him here and also Edward is not a morning person. So I pick our usual table by the window and I sit down with my mocha chino and start to play with my phone while I wait for Edward to get here. All of a sudden I feel someone sit down and I look up expecting to see Edward but instead I find a tall guy with short brown hair and dark green eyes. He introduces himself, "Hi, my name is Ethan and at the risk of sounding like a stalker, I've noticed you here for the last couple week and I think you're one of the prettiest women I've ever seen."
I blush at his compliment and say, "Hi Ethan, I'm Bella, thank you for the compliment."
"You're welcome but I'm only speaking the truth. So Bella tell me are you single?"
I giggle at him. "Well as a matter of a fact I am single as a pringle."
He laughs at my pringle joke and says, "Well that's very good for me." He has an amused expression on a face. We continue talking while I wait for Edward to show up. I learn that Ethan is 34 and he is an orthopedic surgeon at Northwestern. I tell him that I'm a psychologist and he finds it interesting that my specialization is human sexuality. And I'm impressed when he doesn't make some bad sex joke about my specialization. We continue to talk the more I get to know him the more I like him. It's been a while since I have genuinely liked a guy.
When Edward arrives I don't notice him at first because I engrossed in conversation with Ethan. When I look up at Edward he looks like he is in a bad mood but I introduce him to Ethan. Ethan gets up to leave but not before giving me his card and telling me to call him so we can get together again. Edward sits down and we have brunch but the entire time he seems like something is bothering him and when I ask him he just says it's nothing. We finish brunch and we start to head back to our building. Usually after brunch we hangout at one of our apartments but this time Edward says he's has to work and he walks into his apartment without another word. For the next couple days he is moody and is always busy. We usually have breakfast and dinner together so I found it weird when all of a sudden he is trying to avoid hanging out with me. So I decide to make his favorite dinner so that we can talk and get to the bottom of his sudden change in behavior. I go to Edward's apartment to invite him to dinner but he says that he not hungry. Finally I snap because he has been so weird all week and it has finally gotten on my last nerve. "What is going on with you?" I scream.
He looks surprised that I screamed but says, "You want to know what's going on with me?"
"Yes! I just don't get why you are all pissy and avoiding me!" I yell back
"You don't why? Well how do you think I felt when I saw you at our table with some guy you just met laughing with him." He tells me with a look I do not understand. It is almost as if he is hurt.
"Huh? Why does that bother you? It's not like we are dating. I'm free to talk to whoever I want!"
"Well Bella if you must know it bothers me because I am so incredibly consumed by jealousy that I want to punch any guy that looks at you. Bella it bothers me because I am so in love with you that it hurts! And I have been for a long time!"
"You're in love with me!"
"Yes." He whispered looking down at the floor.
"What the hell, Edward! Why now? We have been friends for years! You never gave any indication that you felt for me anything besides a brotherly affection. Hell, you constantly talk about other girls and go out on dates. Since we have been friends you have always talked about the girls you found pretty. Every single time you commented on how you were a sucker for a pretty face, colored eyes, and a small waist! All things that I am not! So how the fuck was I suppose to know that you saw me, as more or that you could be attracted to me! All you ever made me feel like was your friend that let you fool around with her when we were horny. So do not get upset over the fact that I was talking to another man! You never stepped up. So why now?"
"I don't know why now? Maybe it's all the attention you have been getting from guys lately. It made me realize that I wanted more." Edward said sitting down on the couch putting his hands on his knees and cradling his head.
All this has my head spinning and I sit down on the couch beside Edward. Neither of us speaks for a while. All I keep thinking is why now?
"Why now?" I ask
"What?" Edward says.
"Why am I good enough to date now, Edward? Because you spent years making sure I understood that I was not the girl for you. That I was not what you were into! You talked about girls that were the total opposite of me! You dated girls that were the total opposite of me. Hell when we were in high school practically the whole school knew that I liked you and you never saw it! Is it because I'm thinner now? Is that it? I am I now good enough for the great Edward Cullen because now I look like I could belong with you?" I say as with tears in my eyes. The idea that Edward only fell for me because I lost the weight hurts more than I could imagine.
"What? No, Bella, no. I've always loved your body and I have told you many times that your perfect just the way you are." He says shocked. "I think I've always been into you but I was too stupid to do anything about it. Bella, I was the quarterback and I felt like I had to date the prettiest girl in school and I let myself be peer pressured into dating Lauren Mallory."
"Fine that's your excuse for high school, but what about college or the last 10 years! What was the reason for not telling me then?"
"I don't know, Bella! I was a coward and I did not want to lose what we had but then you started dating and got scared I was going to lose you anyways that I finally admitted to myself that I could not hide my feelings anymore. Seeing you with Ethan pushed me over the edge."
"So you wanted me only after you saw that another men wanted me? Really, Edward? I'm not some toy you can have just so no one else can have it! I can't even look at you right now. I have to go. Goodbye…" I leave Edward standing in his living and I walk into my apartment I packed a bag, I get my purse, my passport and my keys and I get a cab to the airport. I buy a first class ticket to Greece and I head to the first class lounge. I sit at the bar and I order a shot of Patron and a cranberry vodka. I down the shot and I nurse my drink as I call Rosalie.
"Rose?" I say.
"Bella? What's up?" She asks and I tell her everything that happened and I tell her my feelings for Edward, the feelings that I have been trying to stop from developing for the last 14 years.
"Oh, honey, Alice and I have known that you were in love with Edward for years but you were so hell bent on denying your feelings and trying to date that Alice and I figured that if you went on some bad dates that maybe you would finally admit that you loved him and maybe to decide to go after Edward." Rose says.
"Rose, I can't face him right now I'm too confused. I'm at the airport and I'm on my way to Greece for two weeks can you please cancel all my appointments for the time being and refer them to Dr. Stevenson. Just tell them that I have some personal matter I need to attend to and schedule them 2 weeks from now." I tell Rosalie.
"Honey, are you sure? But it just seems like you're running away."
"I know that I'm running away, Rose but I need to runaway and be by myself for a couple of weeks. I need time to think and sort it all out. And I can't sort it out if I'm around him." I say.
"Okay honey, well I'll support anything you decide. Just be careful and call me everyday to let me know you are okay?" She asks.
"I will Rose. Oh, can you not tell Edward where I am? Just tell him that I will be back in two weeks and if he wants to talk we can talk then." I tell her.
"If that's what you want." Rose concedes. I ask her to go to my apartment and bring in my mail and water my plants. And we soon hang up. I keep drinking until its time to board. The entire way there I cannot stop thinking about what happened between Edward and I. After a while I decide to just try and get some sleep. When I wake up when the pilot announces that we are about to begin our decent into Athens, Greece. When I get out of the airport I hale a cab and ask it to take me to the hotel I had booked before boarding the plane. The hotel was located in Imeroviglion, Greece so I had a bit of a ride. Once I got to the hotel I checked in and I was taken into my room. I sit on the plush queen size bed and I finally let myself cry. I let myself feel everything I had been trying to trample down since I left Chicago. I finally cry myself out and I take a shower and I get into bed and I just sleep for I do not know how long.
The days pass and I try to not spend the entire time locked in my room. I get up and I go for walks through the town. I interact with the people and just let myself relax. I think about Edward and I reflect on what happened. Everyday I talk to Rosalie and Alice; they do not mention Edward and I do not ask. They ask me about what I'm doing and encourage me to do some fun things so I go parasailing, I take tours of the ruins, I visit different towns, I eat amazing food, I go to the beach, I take a lot of photos. By the end of my trip I am feeling a thousand times better and I feel ready to face Edward. At one point of my trip I realized that I had just as much responsibility of how the things worked out with Edward and I. I spent a lot of time trying to decide whether I wanted to be with Edward and by my last day in Greece I decide that I loved him and if he was up to it we could work on whatever we were.
I fly back and the entire way home I'm nervous about what's going to happen once I see Edward. I arrive at midnight to Chicago so I'm happy that I have that I have a couple hours before I see Edward and I can collect myself. I pay the cab and I make my way to my apartment. When I walk into my apartment I come face to face with a haggard looking Edward.
So this is my first long story. What do you guys think? I know there are some mistakes in it but I would like to hear what you guys think. Please take it easy on me though. I am not a professional writer.
