I really, honestly, like, hate guys. I have never been in a relationship that worked out. And trust me, I'm not problem here. It's the freaking boys in Forks, Washington.
So my first relationship was with Edward Cullen.
Okay fine. We never really dated. But we did in my head. And that counts.
Edward had this whole broody, mysterious, 'I hate my life and my soul is damned' thing going for him, which I must admit, was hot. Very, very hot.
And then waltzes in Miss Fucking Isabella Swan. Oh dear God.
When I first heard we had a new student coming in from Arizona that was that crazy geezer cop's daughter, I think we all expected something a little more exciting than Bella. Hell, this girl was like albino even.
She was so damn average. So why did Edward Cullen have to think she was the best thing to walk this earth? I mean seriously.
Yeah, he looked like he wanted to eat her in the beginning, but then they became like Romeo and Juliet. So freaking charming.
So once I realized Edward Cullen was a moron and clearly could not tell the difference between mom jeans and miniskirts, I found myself a new crush, one that I vowed to myself never to tell to anyone, even Lauren who I now realize was a total bitch, : Eric.
And who did Eric already like? I think you already know. Frigging "Beautiful Swan" or whatever.
So the day after I decided I didn't like Eric, which was ironically the same day I decided I did like him, I realized how to be smart. I fell for the player of the school, because surely he would have me.
But no. Mike had to be obsessed with the mom jeans, just like everyone else in Forks High School. When I asked him to the spring dance he said he'd have to "think about it".
Hell. No.
You do not just tell a girl that you'll "think about it". That's like saying, "Oh, actually, I hate your guts and think you're the ugliest bitch I've ever seen, but am too nice to say anything." You just don't do it.
And you especially do not do tell a girl you'll "think about it" when you turn around the next second and ask Bella Bratface Goose to go with you instead.
Fuck, it was even a girl's choice dance.
But I guess I can't hate Bella too much, cause she did tell Mike that she thought he should tell me yes.
Then again, she did tell Mike that she thought he should tell me yes.
Whatever.
So, I went out with Mike for the rest of my high school life. Yes, we fought almost a hundred times and threatened to break up with the other a million, and broke up then just got back together the next day a billion. But that's what a normal high school relationship is.
Oh sorry. It's not that way for Mr. and Mrs. Bella Swan. Well, for them, they ended up marrying each other right after high school and living happily ever. And then she got this rare skin disease on the honeymoon and ended up dying young and the Cullens moved away in mourning.
Not that I was happy about that or anything.
Anyway, I dated Mike throughout college for a while, and then in my senior year, the night before graduation, he tells me he's going to meet me in my dorm after classes. So I skip on over like a longtime girlfriend should and what do I find when I walk in?
Mike Newton and Lauren Mallory making out.
My boyfriend and my best friend/roomie making out.
And not for the first time.
They'd been at for two years.
They both got bitch slapped and rightfully so.
So of course I broke up with Mike and Lauren became my ex best friend. And then I realized I was kinda stuck. I'd lost nearly six years of my life to Mike Douche Newton.
So I went and got myself a decent job as a secretary at Baker and Brown's: a respectable law firm in Port Angeles that didn't let just anyone in.
And yeah, all it said on the job requirements was to be able to handle a phone, work at a desk, and be overly-perky at all times. But still. It pays well.
I got myself a nice little house just outside of Forks, and real close that La Push beach.
I have a small, but awesome group of girl friends, and all the boys in Forks want us.
Face it: I'm living the life here.
The thing is… I'm still not happy. I feel like I'm missing something, like the piece to my puzzle, or a part of me. No matter how cliché that sounds. With every corner I turn, I'm looking for someone, something to complete my life. There's a little voice inside my head, that's telling me that he's out there somewhere. Mr. Right. The perfect boy. My soul mate.
But that voice can kiss my ass, cause I am single and loving it. I am not Bella Swan, and I don't need a man to make me happy. My fairy tale prince sure as hell is taking his time, so why should I sit on my butt in a tower, waiting for my happy ever after? Who needs royalty when I've got it made?
I'm not Rapunzel. I'm not Cinderella. I'm not Snow White. I'm not Sleeping Beauty. I'm not a fairy tale princess.
I'm me: Jessica Catherine Stanley. Age 24. Blood type A positive.
And I do not need a man to live my life.
So... this is the first ever Jessica/Brady story in all of FF! I'm kind of excited. But whatever. Happy Turkey Day guys! Please review and I love you all :) 3 Kat
