It had been days since the decision had been made. She hadn't really spoken to him since then. She just didn't feel strong anymore. At one time she was the strongest among them, and had felled dozens of titans singlehandedly. They had fought bravely for years, side-by-side. But now it was difficult to even bring herself to look at him.
She looked down at the small sleeping figure in the crook of her arm. The black hair and red scarf was a stark contrast against against her white garment. It was all she could do to stop the tears from falling down her cheek, for if they did she wouldn't be able to wipe them away with the child sleeping as she was. She looked to her other arm, and then her leg, at the stumps that had been left. Years of war had finally caught up to her. Ironically, it had been the same arm and leg that he had lost when it had all started so many years ago. She hadn't fought since, obviously, and wasn't able to follow him into battle as she once had. No, he fought alone now. Well, not really alone. The others were with him. Armin's constant presence gave her something of a relief when she thought about it, but she still didn't like Levi, the man who shared her blood somewhere along the line. She would never get the disgusting taste out of her mouth knowing that fact. But she did know he would protect Eren with his life. She simply couldn't anymore. And the irony was, now, she was going to be the one that would end it.
He had slipped into the room quietly as she had lost herself in thought. After kissing the child in her arms, he took the seat across from her. He had noticed her change in mood since the decision was made, and figured things would be different between them in the days leading up to the event, but he didn't want them to be. He wanted everything to be the same. He wanted to cherish their waning moments together.
"Mikasa," he finally said softly.
She didn't answer, but simply continued to stare at her lap. Slowly, he reached out a hand and placed it on her good leg.
"Do you want me to take you for a walk?" he asked softly.
She sat still for another few moments and then finally nodded. Eren stood up slowly as the pain that had become all too familiar in the last year radiated through his joints. He felt so old, and in his condition he was. He'd already outlasted what he should have, and he knew the end was near if they didn't act fast. It just didn't feel like 24 years was long enough to accomplish what he'd wanted to. But he was never one to pity himself, so he focused on the positive. His family.
He walked behind Mikasa's chair and began to roll it down the hallway and out of their small house. The sun was high in the sky, and the white walls seemed to gleam in its brilliance. The walls weren't much more than a showpiece at this point. The outside world had been opened to them and for once in their lives, they had their enemies on the run. The war had been running smoothly for their side for over two years, and Levi had privately confided in him that there could be a ceasefire signed within the next few months. Levi had also stressed, perhaps in a rare moment of empathy, that they would never have made it as far as they had without his power and commitment.
Eren pondered all they had been through as he looked down at his quiet wife. The blood and tears they had shed. All the friends they had lost. The guttural suffering they had gone through. Levi had succeeded in his goal. Eren did feel better. In fact, he could even say he felt…peace. For once in his life, he felt at peace.
Mikasa on the other hand did not. Her nightmare only seemed to be getting worse. Why had she agreed? Why did she say she would do it? Was is selfishness? Was it because she missed her limbs so much? She had never even considered that. Why did she agree to take on the Attack Titan and the Founding Titan powers? Why had she agreed to devour her husband?
Eren had stopped walking. Mikasa finally looked up and found herself under a familiar tree on a familiar hillside. Eren had already taken a seat against the large tree and stared off into the distance.
As if reading her mind, he said, "You have to do it, you know?"
"I…" she started, but her voice caught in her throat.
"I'm the one who suggested it, you know," he revealed while chancing a look at her over his shoulder, "not Levi."
The flame in her eyes ignited as her temper began to flare. She wanted to hit and kick him. She wanted to bash his face in until he saw things her way, but she couldn't. "Why, Eren!?"
"We already explained, Mikasa!" he defended, "You're the most logical choice. Not only can we not risk these powers being passed to some random Eldian in some remote country, or even on the enemy's side, but they need you back on the battlefield. They need your human power as much as they need the Attack Titan's power. Plus, I think Levi and Armin really want to see what an Ackerman titan shifter is capable of."
He smirked as he delivered the final sentence, which only worked Mikasa up that much more.
"You are still a reckless idiot, Eren! And you're lucky I can't punch you in this condition."
"You'd wake the baby for sure," Eren laughed as he crawled over to Mikasa and placed a kiss on her lips. Shortly thereafter, he found himself on his back, having forgotten that she still had one free leg. He laughed and sat up again and looked off into the distance.
"I don't know if I can, Eren," Mikasa said after another moment of silence.
"You won't even remember it, Mikasa," Eren responded absentmindedly.
"That's not what I mean!" she yelled back, startling her husband as he turned to look at her. "I…I don't know that I can raise our child alone. I don't know that I can live without you!"
Eren grabbed her hand and gazed intensely into her eyes. Her breath caught in her throat as feelings rushed through her, reminding her why she had fallen in love with this boy. His intense focus, his courage, his will to live, it was all contagious. And in that moment, she loved him more than she ever had before.
"Mikasa, this is the one way I can be with you forever," he said slowly and forcefully before once again kissing her. The sounds of chirping birds and playing children in the distance all faded away as she and Eren said goodbye in their own way.
Mikasa hadn't expected such a large contingent of the Scouts and MP's to attend the "ritual," but when questioned, Levi had stated in no uncertain terms that it was because of who she was and their inability to predict how powerful her titan would be. And so, one hundred soldiers surrounded them on every side in the large subterranean city. It was the best place to have her transform and make sure that she could be subdued with the ODM gear if it came to that.
She was scared. For the first time since having given birth and dealing with the prospect of raising a child in an environment of war, she was shaking. Footsteps beside her startled her and she quickly and expertly turned her chair to face them. Levi raised an eyebrow as he sat a large syringe filled with a clear fluid in her lap.
"It's up to you how you want to administer it. I can do it, you can do it, or Eren can do it," he said. His stoic monotone delivery annoyed her to no end. How could this unfeeling man be her relative?
"You're not doing it," she growled at him. He simply nodded.
Gazing down at the needle, time seemed to stop. The drips of water in the large cave sounded like waterfalls as her vision tunneled. The shaking was almost uncontrollable now. NO! She couldn't do it. She just couldn't. Grabbing the syringe in her hand, she heaved it away from herself as hard as she could and began to move her chair toward the exit of the cave as quickly as she could. She was halted suddenly as Levi grabbed the arms of the wheelchair and prevented her from moving.
"What are you doing, Mrs. Yeager!?" Levi said more calmly than she had expected. "The supply of that serum is extremely limited!"
"Good!" she screamed at him. "I am not doing this. There's no way you can make me!"
And with that she felt a sharp pain in her arm stub. She looked down at the syringe, now empty of its contents, and then followed the hand and arm that held it to its owner. Eren stood there, tears running down his face, but with a determined and loving expression, which was the last thing she saw before the nightmare started.
It was weeks later before Jean saw her again. He hadn't slept much since the "ritual" had occurred. The whole thing had become a nightmare. Thirteen soldiers had died restraining the most fearsome titan (shifter or not) he had ever seen. Mikasa's titan was something he had never dreamed of in his worst nightmares. And it had gone crazy with an unbridled rage. Eren finally had to transform to hold her down. He had to harden his titan and then voluntarily let Mikasa devour him, which took some time since Mikasa seemed to recognize who he was, even in titan form, for some time. But finally, things ended and Levi, Hanji, and Armin had quickly hauled Mikasa's steaming form off after cutting her out of her titan.
Jean had inquired about her to Armin, but wasn't expecting the look of despair he had seen in Armin's eyes. His blonde friend didn't want to talk about it, but did mumble something about never having seen someone weep for so long.
And then one day she appeared with Levi wearing the stripes of a general. She held her head high and looked like the Mikasa he remembered. And she went back to being a soldier and a mother. But Jean could tell she wasn't the same. He figured she never would be.
Mikasa looked out on the battlefield before her. Levi had put everything they had into this final offensive, and they were winning. Combined with Armin's power and the new weapons they had developed over the last few years, their enemies were falling fast. But she knew they were out there. The other titan shifters still loyal to their enemies. She narrowed her eyes and waited. She was ready.
For a long time she had been angry with him and had refused to acknowledge his presence within her, but, like she always did, she buckled to Eren. He had been right when he said he would always be with her. He was with her even now. She didn't know if it was really him. Could it actually be his spirit? Or was it just the memories he had transferred to her? She wasn't for sure, but so often it seemed like he was still speaking to her. Still assuring her that he loved her. And when she held their child, it was almost as if she could feel three heartbeats. She liked to think he was still alive within her, and there wasn't much that could dissuade her from that belief.
Jean had been very nice to her since she had returned to public life, but she simply had no time for romance. Not again. And she could tell Eren, whether real or memory, did not appreciate his advances. She could take care of herself now. She could care for her child. And she had Armin and Historia. Her heart was only so big.
The flashes of light cut through the sky as the Armored and Jaw Titans finally showed themselves. She knew neither personally anymore. Reiner and Ymir were dead, and for that she was glad. She could tell Eren was pleased with that thought as well.
But it was time to take out whoever had inherited these titan powers. It was time to take them back. For the Eldian race. For all of her friends. For Eren. For her!
"I love you, Mikasa," she heard Eren say as she bit her hand and transformed.
Note: My first piece of AoT fanfiction. So this is a possible future and I think a decent way to end the series if you ask me. But did anyone ask me? No? Oh well.
Anyway, I know there's some controversy over whether Mikasa could even transform into a titan given she's Asian AND Ackerman, but her dad could have very well been a descendant of an Eldian somewhere down the line, so it's never clear. And even if she can't transform canonically, this is fanfiction so it's okay! Let me know what you think!
