Somewhere in the known universe

The Doctor was lonely. Some days, he felt like he was always lonely. For some reason, in spite of his undeniable good looks and winning personality, his friends never seemed to hang around for long.

But, the Doctor had A Plan. And The Plan was going to change all of that. The Doctor was very proud of his Plan. He thought it was the best plan he'd ever had, even better than the time just last week that he'd thought up the Amazing, Cool and Charming Plan to win Rose back from his human counterpart by showing up dressed as Prince Charming and serenading her.

The Doctor remembered that he had Promised Not To Think About That. EVER again.

And anyway, it didn't matter, because the new plan was this: The Doctor was going to travel to a parallel dimension in his TARDIS!

Well, OK, maybe it wasn't the most original plan ever, but that didn't matter, because this plan was going to be a success. The Doctor had even chosen where he wanted to land. He'd always liked Scotland, so he was going to the parallel Scotland. Personally, he was hoping to meet a real haggis, the animal not the foodstuff.

Convinced that this plan was going to work out just fine, The Doctor set off.

-

At Hogwarts

Harry Taylor was lonely. Killing the Dark Lord Hildemort should clearly have gotten him loads of girls. But for some reason, they just didn't seem to fancy him. And ever since his two supposed best friends, Non Jonsley and Camione Granger had started going out, they always seemed to be sneaking off, making excuses like "we need to go to see Snapelow about our potions homework" or "Jaco Malward needs to talk to us". Harry wasn't stupid. He could tell they were having a secret love affair.

As he wandered miserably through Hogwarts, he was shocked to hear a really loud, grating sound. It sounded like many cats being scraped along a chalkboard. Not that Harry knew what that would sound like... anyway, it was a horrible sound. Harry pulled out his wand and cast a spell to protect himself from... loud noises. It seemed like a sensible thing to do.

Suddenly, a blue box began to materialise in front of Harry. "What a horribly inefficient portkey," Harry thought. "It takes ages to appear, and it's much too loud." Whoever owned that box needed to come back to Hogwarts.

And then,the door opened, and out walked the most incredibly good looking man Harry had ever seen in his whole entire life.