Summary:

He came to her in piece, but she couldn't do anything because she was already gone.

Warning character death :D

So this is a what if story. So its like what if Riza died and what not. OK so the idea poped into my head when I was listening to Pieces by Red .com/watch?v=x3U6BCUQqG8 ...while I'm having major writters block with other stories...*cough*

All characters belong to Hirokawa...Cow person I don't know the name Dx

So enjoy!

He could've sworn it was raining that day; it wouldn't stop, not even once. It was cold, wet and very merciless. It wouldn't let up even when he was driving home.

It's raining, he would say but no one would understand and say he was crazy. And when they did, he'd let out a mordant chuckle which would soon fade. There was only one person who knew what he was only one person who knew what he meant. But now she was gone, gone from the world of the living and will never be able to see the light of day again.

She was gone; he'd have to face it. She no longer existed and no longer breathed. And that's what hurt the most for him, that and he would never see her smiling face ever again.

That day of rain he was talking about was the day of her funeral. And as in her funeral, Riza Hawkeye's funeral. He has dealt with one of his best friend's deaths before but this time, it was too much. But unlike the last time, there were no words of comfort and warm assuring embraces. This was cutting it close, too close in fact.

Everyone saw the look on the Colonel's face; even to the people who didn't know him found it heart breaking. His face was drained of all color, his eye downcast and focused on the empty hole in the ground. Knowing soon it would be filled. His face looked even paler, if possible, against the contrast of his hair and-what seemed to be permanent on his skin- his military uniform. There was no emotion on his face until he saw the casket being carried over towards them.

They saw the look on his face; it was of utter terror and sadness, which he tried to hide behind his military hat even though he's usually used his hair which was now slicked back. The people around him were afraid to touch him because they were afraid he'd break into a million pieces. And those pieces could only be picked up by her only she could make him whole again.

But they didn't have to touch him; he was already breaking slowly on the inside. It was a torment only he can feel and the storm would not pass soon. It was only until she was literally six feet under did it start raining.

After a few words of respect and kindness, which the Colonel did not participate in, were they able to leave. They didn't make him speak, for everyone knew if he would he'd shatter in front of all of them. Even though he could say a lot about her, every single thing that was wonderful about her, everything he admired.

A few of his subordinates and friends offered him a ride home, but he told them no. They all looked at him worried as they left what seemed to be the pit of hell for him. And yet, he would not move from where he was. Roy was stuck staring at the newly placed gravestone. It was only until he literally forced himself to move was when he finally left.

"Good-bye," he whispered to nothing but the wind carried his words to her grave. And they settled down in front of it, like the flowers he had placed there. White roses, sunflowers, lavender and lilies were her favorites, he'd always remember that.

He walked slowly to his car; he opened the door half heartedly and got in. He sat in his car for what seemed like forever. But then he thought, the sooner he got home the sooner the day would be over. Or rather the sooner he'd be able to grieve in solitude and quiet.

Roy started driving and it started raining again. He wish he could stop it but it just wouldn't go away and when it did, it would come right back. But still the Colonel kept going, as if a silent force was carrying him forward.

It wasn't only until he looked in his rear view mirror did the rain come down hard. He saw her sitting there in the back seat, like she usually did when she was alive.

His dark onyx eyes widened as wide as they could possibly go. And he pulled over immediately almost getting hit by a couple of cars, who honked their horns maliciously. Roy wished he would've gotten struck by one of those cars. But much to his dismay, that would never happen.

He rested his head on his folded hands on the stirring wheel and closed his eyes.

"W-Why her…"he stammered and choked on a sob as the memories flooded back.

She was on the floor, covered in a red liquid, which he wished wasn't her blood. He saw what they did but he didn't want to believe it was her slowly getting her life drained from her now cold body. She looked at him with fading eyes as he was given his choices. He gave the wrong yet correct answer but he was too late. She was already gone by the time he held her in his arms, dead.

Roy held her close, his own gloved hands getting cover in her blood which he wished was his instead of hers. He thought, if it was himself who was dying instead of her, she would be able to live on without him. But earlier that dreadful day Riza said herself, she would kill herself as soon as the battle they started was over. If he was no longer with them in the world of the living.

He replied as he looked at the ground, "I can't lose you…" Everything seemed to foreshadow her death, yet he was blind to the signs.

Roy finally got home after what seemed hours upon hours. He opened the door and walked into his own personal hell. Roy was alone as usual in his own home, always empty. But this emptiness was different now; it could no longer be filled.

He slowly walked over to his bed and sat there. He looked at the space behind him, smiling weakly. There were many times he's looked at that spot in the morning after he woke up, wishing she was there. Wishing that every morning he could wake up to her sleeping form right next to him. Or to see her smiling face when he first woke up and hear her whisper good morning. But that wouldn't happen, not now and not ever.

He sighed, the smile completely erasing itself from his face. Roy turned his head around and looked back towards the door and he felt his stomach drop.

She was there again, just standing and looking at him. Her mahogany brown eyes focused on him and with her golden blonde hair was down. She had her black short sleeved turtle necked shirt and her uniform pants and boots on.

Roy couldn't muster up any words nor could he move, he just stared in disbelief. Riza was there, in front of him with no blood, looking as real as ever. But her skin was softly glowing and looked paler than usual. It brought back the memories.

"It's not your fault Roy." She said, her voice slightly echoed through the room.

"You're lying…" he replied to her, slowly looking down.

"Roy, have I ever lied to you?" He didn't answer her, he didn't want to.

"I tried so hard…" Roy half choked on a sob. "But I-I couldn't save you…I was too late I-" Riza hushed him with one slender finger on his lips.

"You tried your best, that's all that matters now." A smile graced her face; it looked so honest and real.

"But it wasn't good enough," Riza's hand fell to her side and she looked at Roy again. "I can't do this…alone. I can't do it on my own. It's pathetic really…I've had this happen before, but now…I'm just falling apart. And now I come to you in pieces…" He went silent for a long while, "I can't do this on my own, and I feel so alone…I'm pathetic." He buried his face into his hands.

"Roy," she whispered sweetly and stood right in front of him. She placed her hand on his shoulder causing him to look at her, "What you're feeling is normal…I remember how you were when Hughes…died. You were a mess just like now. And you're not pathetic…it's called bebing able to feel something Roy." Her hand that was on his shoulder moved to his cheek.

"But you were there to help now you're not." He cried desperately.

"I am here aren't I?" Riza desperately tried to make him laugh or smile. But her humor failed and didn't reach to him.

"No…Riza I'm alone."

She frowned but kept her hand in place, "Roy, you're never alone." She smiled again, "I'll always be here." She used her other hand and placed it over his heart.

His eyes began to water again; he never thought he could cry so much before. And he did as she smiled weakly at him.

"Don't cry Roy," she said in a sweet voice with a hint of desperation.

He pulled Riza into an embrace as he wept and she hugged him back. He felt a tug at his heart and a bit of happiness take over. He could feel her warmth engulf him like a flame, but it was nothing like a fire. It was more like a warm blanket of comfort and love.

He stopped crying after he felt that feeling take over; he smiled and savored the moment. It wouldn't last long he knew that yet he was stuck in the moment where he was finally able to hold her in his arms. His smile grew a little bit when a certain smell rose to his nose.

"Lavender and roses," he whispered in a bitter sweet tone.

She let out a soft laugh, "Those are one of my favorites. They were beautiful by the way." She referred back to the flowers he had left her at her grave, and the happiness that was once there was now gone.

But no matter what he didn't let her go, he held her close to savor the things he would soon have to live without. Roy breathed in, keeping her smell fresh in his mind and her softness in his memory. Then he realized, she was fading.

"I love you." He said to her finally. After all these years and all these hard times, he finally said it even if it was too late. He let her go and watched her back away from him.

Riza looked like she had watery eyes but she was smiling at him and that was all he needed. She mouthed the words thank you with the smile sill painted on her beautiful face. And with that she disappeared yet her warmth staid.

Even though Roy prepared himself for this moment, he couldn't handle it. He felt a hole begin to form in his chest and the rain start to pour yet again. He reached over to his night stand and reached for the light switch on his lamp.

He turned it on, she wasn't there. He couldn't find here even if the room was now engulfed in light. He turned it off, she still wasn't there.

Roy repeated the motion several time until his hand fell to his lap. He gave up, he was done. Riza would never come back and he had to realize that.

He stared at his nightstand, overwhelmed by the feeling of pulling out the gun that was inside it and put it to his head. And with the pull of the trigger it would all be over with.

No, he thought. Roy couldn't and he wouldn't. He had to live on and do the things he was meant to do. The things she was helping him do; helping him to accomplish his dream and for everyone to live in a happy world. And she will still help him, even if she wasn't there in person, she'd always be there in spirit and in his heart.

Roy lied down on his bed closing his eyes. He remembered ever word she said and everything she has said to him. He would cherish those words and he would live on. He would live on knowing he wasn't alone anymore, she would always be there with him. Roy smiled to himself and fell asleep.

He would wake up the next day and life would go on as if nothing had happened. The sun would still be shining and the birds would keep singing. The world kept moving forward and he'd have to move with it. Life is a part of the world and so was death.

He'd keep on smiling and laughing. He'd live everyday with her in his memory and Roy would carry on as he usually did when she was alive. Always remembering what has happen and will look forward to what will happen. And he was grateful that she was able to make him feel whole again. She was able to glue the broken pieces back together. And she also made the rain go away; the sky was now clear and cloudless, happy.

The reason why he was happy was because he knew that someday they would be together again.

Author's note: Sad no? :D I love emo/hallucinating Roy...just kidding ahaha. It made me sad while writting ): and it helped me blow off some emotional steam xD

But anyways this is dedicated to my best friend who also somewhat inspired the story but she doesn't know that ;D lawl

Well hope you enjoyed it.