Hey everyone!
This is a little fanfic i made of an akatsuki t/d, hope you like it.
Warning:
Slight implied SasoDei..., a blond in pain, language, and inappropriate comments, angry plants, sad sharks, and a poor Uchiha.
oh and also, OOC-ness... and uh.. some words that are suppose to be capitalized but are not. heheh sry, hope you like it anyways!!1!
Disclaimer: don't own
Akatsuki
truth or dare
Itachi: Okay, I'll start, Kakuzu truth or dare?
Kakuzu looked up from counting his money.
Kakuzu: Why me first?
Itachi: I dunno. Just pick.
Kakuzu: truth…
Itachi: sigh fine... um... is it true that you're the person who stole all of our money that we were all saving for a new TV…?
Kakuzu: -looking nervous- maybe…
Everyone shot kakuzu a deadly glare. Kakuzu just went back to counting his money.
Kakuzu: Sasori, truth or dare?
Sasori was looking at his nicely done, dark purple, painted nails.
Sasori: Dare.
Kakuzu: I dare you to check if Deidara is a guy or not.
Deidara looked at kakuzu in complete shock, itachi, hidan, kisame, and leader started laughing there asses off. Sasori just twitched.
Deidara: WTF!!?!? OF COURSE IM AND EFFIN GUY!!!!!! Un!
Kakuzu: you have no prove, and plus you do look like a flat chested girl.
Deidara: grrr well you don't have to make someone, especially Sasori no Danna, to prove it!!!!! UN!
Kakuzu: why? I thought you would've wanted, of all people, your Danna, or in other words, your sex toy to prove it.
By now Deidara's face was a light shade of pink, Sasori was just looking at kakuzu in disgust, and everyone else was dieing of laughter at the words kakuzu had said.
Deidara: IT'S NOT FUNNY!! un!
Deidara shouted, now facing the group of laughing, nearly dead, s-ranked criminals.
Everyone except sasori and deidara: yes it is!!
Deidara: grr
Sasori got up and walked to Deidara, he just wanted to get this over with.
Deidara: D-danna.. w-what are you d-doing? Un...
Sasori: Shut up brat.
Everyone was just watching, trying there best to not laugh.
Deidara just looked at his Danna, his face still slightly pink. By now Deidara and Sasori were standing across from each other.
Deidara: …
Sasori just raised his leg and kicked Deidara right in the balls.
Deidara: OW, GOD DAMMIT!! AHH
While saying this deidara fell to the ground in a lot of pain, cussing, and mumbling things. Sasori just sat back down as if he didn't care about how much pain his partner was in.
Everyone was just looking at Deidara, glad that it wasn't them in that position.
Kisame: ouch, that had to hurt…
Deidara was still in pain on the floor, itachi had to drag him out of the middle of the circle so they could finish there game.
Sasori: anyways… Zetsu, truth or dare?
Just as Sasori said this, a certain hyper ninja ran into the room.
Tobi: HELLO EVERYONE!!! Tobi is back from his mission!!!1!
Leader: Did you get the eggs for tomorrows breakfast Tobi?
Tobi: Yes Leader-sama! Tobi was a good boy; Tobi even put the eggs in the fridge this time!!!
Leader: Good, so now u know not to put the eggs in the microwave?
Tobi: Yes leader-sama!!
Tobi took a seat by Zetsu.
Tobi: er.. Zetsu-san?
W/Zetsu: yes Tobi?
B/Zetsu: What do you want now?!??!
Tobi: tobi wants to know… what is wrong with deidara-senpai?
Tobi pointed to, the still in pain, deidara.
W/Zetsu: Oh... well you see tobi, sasori hurt him…
Tobi: Why?
B/Zetsu:laugh because kakuzu told him to!
Mainly everyone gave a small chuckle.
Sasori: ANYWAYS! Zetsu, truth or dare??
You could tell by now that sasori was getting impatient.
W/Zetsu: Tru-
B/Zetsu: DARE!!
W/Zetsu:sigh fine… dare…
Sasori: I dare you to leave after your turn!
B/W Zetsu: What?? Why?!
Sasori: cuz you and your other half are freaky…
B/Zetsu: FINE!! BUT JUST SO YOU KNOW, YOU'RE FREAKIER!! YOU PIECE OF SHITTY WOOD!!!1!
Sasori: whatever…
W/Zetsu: Deidara, truth or dare?
Tobi: Oh! Oh! Tobi wants to go!!!
B/Zetsu: LATER TOBI!!
By now deidara was able to at least sit up, he was still in some pain though.
Deidara: Can't you pick someone else here? Un? I mean why me?? I'm still in pain!! Un!
B/Zetsu: CHOOSE!
Deidara: fine.. dare un.
B/Zetsu: I DARE YOU TO FUCK SASORI!
Sasori: WTH?!
B/Zetsu: IT'S CALLED PAYBACK!!
W/Zetsu: Calm down Deidara, that's not the dare I'm giving you.
Deidara sighed in relieve, Sasori had calmed down and went back to looking at his nails.
Itachi smirked.
Itachi: hah, that would've been funny though; I wonder which one of you would be seme.
Sasori: Even if we were in some sort of relationship, which we are not and never will be, I would be seme.
Deidara: psh, yea right. I'm taller than you, so I would be seme. Un.
Sasori shot a glare at deidara; sasori didn't want to get into a conversation about such a weird and unusual topic.
Sasori: I am older, wiser, and more mature, so I would be seme and you would be the uke in the relationship that will never happen!
Everyone was watching in amusement, except for Tobi, who didn't know what they were talking about. Tobi didn't not know what seme and uke were.
Deidara just rolled his eyes; he thought the conversation was weird as well.
Deidara: whatever un… Zetsu, just finish the stupid dare un.
B/Zetsu had a smirk on; the conversation between the two artists was rather amusing for him.
W/Zetsu: Okay, I dare you to… give tobi a hug and tell him that tobi is a good boy.
B/Zetsu: WHAT?? That's it?!? Why don't you what to get revenge against that stupid red head for getting rid of us?!! At least tell the blonde to make out with the piece of shit!
Sasori and Deidara just stared at Zetsu blankly.
Deidara: whatever un.
Sasori: he's not gonna try and kiss me, is he?
Deidara got up slowly, still in pain from earlier, and slowly walked over to… Tobi! And gave tobi a hug.
Deidara: Tobi is a good boy (he said faintly)
Tobi squealed in excitement, this was the very first time tobi had heard his senpai call tobi a good boy and also the first time deidara showed he 'cared' for tobi. Tobi threw his arms around his senpai and return the hug, but tobi was squeezing Deidara very, very, tightly.
Deidara: …obi..cant..breaa..thee…un…
Tobi realized he was choking his senpai and immediately released him.
Tobi: Sorry Senpai, Tobi just got excited.
Deidara: It's okay Tobi… (He said faintly again...)
Sasori just looked at his partner in disgust. Zetsu went to his room, and Deidara sat back down. Deidara was thinking who he should choose; he wanted to get back at kakuzu for making sasori prove he was a guy. Then he smirked.
Deidara: Itachi truth or dare?
Itachi: Only people who lack hatred pick truth, so I choose dare.
Deidara: I dare you to…
Deidara walked over to Itachi and whispered him the rest of the dare into his ear so no one else could hear.
Itachi: so this is your idea of revenge?
Deidara nodded proudly.
Itachi: Fine, but don't get me into this mess… and besides… your idea lacks hatred.
Itachi got up and pulled Kakuzu by the collar and moved him about five feet away from his money. Then Itachi used a jutsu and set all of Kakuzu's money on fire.
Kakuzu: NOOOOOOOO!!! My MONEY!!!! DAMN YOU DEIDARA!! I'LL FUCKIN GET YOU BACK FOR THIS!!!
By now Deidara was slightly laughing as poor kakuzu broke down in tears, over what used to be his money but was now just ashes.
Itachi thought Kakuzu was just plain pathetic.
Itachi: Konan, truth or dare?
Konan was quiet through out the whole game; she was lying on her stomach reading a magazine right by Pein. She looked up to Itachi.
Konan: Truth.
Itachi: Is there something going on between you and Leader?
Pein shot Itachi a glare, Itachi just grinned. Konan's expression didn't change.
Konan: Maybe.
After she said that she just went back to her magazine.
Everyone started to chuckle, except for kakuzu, who was still crying over his money, and tobi, who just didn't see why it was funny, he actually thought it was pretty cute. Pein just stared at Konan, but she didn't really seem to notice.
Konan: Tobi, truth or dare.
Tobi's head shot up.
Tobi: Dare!! Tobi picks dare Konan-Chan!!
Konan: Well since Tobi is a good boy, I dare you to…
Konan got up and walked over to Tobi. She whispered a few things into Tobi's ear; you could see that she was smiling.
Tobi: Oh, but wouldn't he get mad Konan-Chan?
Konan: Don't worry about it Tobi, now be a good boy and do your dare.
Tobi: Okay Konan-Chan!
Tobi ran off to… well… somewhere else in the Akatsuki hide out. Konan went back to her position and deidara was praying that Tobi's dare didn't involve him in any way.
When Tobi returned he had a blindfold and something behind his back. He went over to Itachi and placed the blindfold on him.
Deidara sighed in relief.
Itachi: Tobi, may I ask what the hell you are doing?!
Tobi didn't answer, Itachi couldn't see anything, even if he used the sharigan… he was defenseless.
Everyone watched as Tobi took out Itachi's hair tie. Then Tobi turned around so no one could see what he was doing and then he squirted a pink liquid into his hand. Everyone was watching with interest as the Hyper Ninja put the pink liquid into Itachi's hair. Itachi was still wondering wtf Tobi was doing. After about five minutes, Tobi had finished. He was proud about how well of a job he did. Konan was giggling throughout the whole time and that bothered Itachi. Tobi put Itachi's hair back into a ponytail and then removed the blindfold. Itachi was looking around at everyone's expression. Everyone was starring at him, Tobi sat back down and then Deidara burst out laughing followed by everyone else except for Tobi.
Tobi: did tobi make a mistake? Did Tobi not follow konan's orders right?
Itachi: what the hell did that idiot do?
Itachi got up and looked in the closest mirror. Itachi went wide eyed. His hair was pink! Of all the colors in the world, his hair was pink.
Itachi gave a really load girly scream that even is brother could of heard. Then Itachi pasted out.
In Konoha
Sasuke was eating Dinner with his team, when they heard a girly scream.
Naruto: What was that?
Sakura: I don't know…
Sasuke smirked.
Sasuke:kukuku, sounds like Itachi's suffering…
Back in Akatsuki
Konan: wow… Luckily for him that the hair color will wash out in a few days.
Everyone was laughing at Itachi's performance.
Tobi: Okay!! Tobi's turn now!!!
Tobi looked around the circle.
Tobi: um.. Tobi chooses Hidan! Hidan, truth or dare?
Hidan: Dare.
Tobi: uhh… Tobi dares Hidan to… Give Kakuzu a hug!!!
Kakuzu was still sad about all his money being burnt, and mainly Tobi was the only one who noticed.
Hidan: Wth!? Why?!
Tobi: Because!! Kakuzu is sad and looks like he could use a hug!!!
Hidan walked over to Kakuzu, mumbling a lot of bad things about Tobi. Kakuzu just glared at his partner as he walked towards him. Kakuzu did not want Hidan to touch him; he didn't even want his partner near him.
Hidan stopped about a foot in front of Kakuzu, looking at him blankly. Hidan got down on his knees and gave kakuzu a really quick hug, if you could even call it a hug. Then Hidan went back to his spot and sat down.
Hidan: Leader, truth or dare?
Leader: … Dare…
Hidan started thinking of something to make the leader do. While Hidan was thinking, Itachi woke up.
Itachi: w-where am I?
Tobi: Oh itachi-san, you're awake!! Good!! We're still playing truth or dare.
Konan: and don't worry itachi, your hair will be back to normal in a few days or so.
Konan smirked and Itachi looked in the mirror again. This time he didn't scream like a little school girl or pass out.
Itachi: WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR?!?
Deidara rolled his eyes. Konan smirked. And Hidan Laughed.
Deidara: hmft! My hair's better than his! Un.
Hidan: Anyways… Leader, I dare you to…
Tobi: Eat a bug?
Hidan looked at tobi.
Hidan: No… I dare you to let us have vacation for the next week.
Leader nodded, it could've been worse than that, way worse, so Pein didn't complain.
Deidara: YAY!! Vacation!! Un!
Sasori: hm... Maybe I can finish some puppets... hopefully deidara wont bother me too much…
Kisame: YES! Finally, I can go and visit my mom!! I hope no one ate her yet…
Itachi: what to do… hm… I can go around Kohana and tell little kids they lack hatred…
Konan: finally a break from these people…
Tobi: yay!!! I can hang out with deidara-senpai and Zetsu-san!!!
Kakuzu: my money… why did they burn you tries not to cry
Leader: Kisame, your last so truth or dare?
Kisame: um… truth?
Leader: is it true that your father raped a fish and that was how you were born?
Kisame just gave leader a you're-kidding-me-right? Look, and then got up and went into is room.
And no one ever knew the reason why Kisame is blue and looks like a shark.
----
reviewing would be nice
and flames will be used to make Dei-kun and Sasori-no-Danna some cookies .
