James watched lily storm off in tears. He advanced on Severus ready to rip him apart but saw Lily turning the corner and couldn't stop himself.
"Evans….hey Evans! Oh come on, stop already would ya?"
Lily stopped but couldn't make herself turn, her beautiful face was red from the anger and embarrassment and she knew she was going to cry.
"What do you want James?" she said her back still to him
"Oh come on Evans, I know you're upset. No one could be okay after having someone like Snivellus call them a…well you know."
"It's not just Severus, James, it's you, it's the way you treat people, the way you treat me!" she said turning around and shouting as loud as she could. James looked shocked. He had just stood up for her he had just kept Snape from jumping down her throat and this is how she repays him.
They stood there in silence, breathing heavily for a few moments before Lily noticed the crowd and took off again. Infuriated James followed her as she passed through what seemed an invisible wall. James had never been here before, a hidden corridor…how could he have missed it? Aware of James following her Lily picked up the pace to a near run. James finally caught up with her and grabbed her arm roughly knocking her books to the ground as she spun around to meet his gaze. She looked at him steadfast and didn't move one muscle. James was livid.
"How dare you….what gives you the right? Who exactly do you think you are talking to me like that?"
"'Evans' remember? Maybe Snape called me a mud-blood but at least he doesn't call me by my last name like I was one of his little…followers."
"I see" James screamed back at her "because I treat you like I treat my friends you have to go get all crazy on me and …"
"Crazy? Crazy? If you think that was crazy wait 'till I…"
"What? Huh? Until you what?" James was losing control and fast, yelling anything he thought might get at her, "Yell at me some more? Tell me how great you think Snivellus is? Go ahead…what do I need you for? I go and stick up for you and this is the thanks I get? You Listen to me Lily Evans, yell at me all I want, Snivellus got what was coming to him and you, you arrogant, know-it-all, miss goodie-goodie, you can go straight to Azkaban for all I care!"
Lily had turned bright red and closed her eyes for a moment fighting back the tears.
"I see." She said calmly as she turned and walked off in tears leaving James as he slumped down the wall head in his hands trying to figure out why he had gotten so worked up over what Lily thought of him.
James was plagued by Lily the whole next day, in the classes they had together he couldn't help but look over and when they weren't together in classes he was thinking about her. That night at Quidditch practice he took a bludger to the shoulder 6 minutes in and had to be sent to Madame Pompfre. As James was admiring the particularly gruesome way his arm hung limply he overhead a voice, it was Lily. He jumped back in surprise hiding behind a suit of armor, his heart beating rapidly.
'Why am I hiding from her? Oh this is ridiculous' he thought to himself. As he gathered the courage to step out he heard another voice.
"Really Lily, I swear, you're the prettiest girl in 5th year. I don't know how I got you to go out with me."
James was infuriated. 'Who was she going out with? She should be with me. No, wait I don't like her she's completely irrational, and she's mean….yeah! She's mean' he thought desperately trying to erase the image of taking her into his arms as he kissed her. 'I do not like people who are mean, besides Lupin would never let me hear the end of it.' As he was thinking this he noticed how quite it had gotten, peering out from behind the armor just in time to see Lily kissing Charles Mower a 6th year whose family was famous in the wizarding world for inventing magical objects.
His great-great grandfather Bob 'Steamy' Mower owned a shop selling used brooms, pots and other random object until he invented the pensive and became instantly rich. His great grandfather, Claudius Jacque Elander Mower, spent his share of his fathers inheritance investing in his new invention the sneak a scope and tripled the family's fortune, and his father, Charles Spinner Mower Sr., spent his time writing books and was now responsible for having compiled 3 highly useful volumes on magical creatures of the Norse country and a book on Transfiguration which Hogwarts had adopted as new literature 4 years ago, his latest book was rumored to be about defense of the dark arts and was said to have many famous auror's on pins and needles in wait.
James moved back quickly, he could feel his face growing red hot and his breathing becoming irregular. Hardly thinking he drew his wand in his only useful hand and pointed it at the tapestries hanging behind them and thought with everything in him 'Eversio'.
The tapestries immediately began tearing themselves shreds falling all over Charles and Lily as they screamed. James leaned back in triumph not only having stopped them but also from being the only one in his year to ever have successfully performed a non-verbal spell. After they had left and a quick trip to Madame Pompfre James returned to the common room, ready to brag but disappointed to find only Lupin awake.
"Lupin, you'll never believe…"
James reached for Lupin's butterbeer as he finished regaling Lupin with his defeat of Charles and Lily. As he gulped down the last of it he looked at Lupin ready to receive his praise but only finding a knowing smirk.
"What?"
"You like her."
"I DO NOT"
"Alright…you don't." Lupin said a little too agreeably as he gathered his parchment and headed up to bed.
"Come on Moony, I don't…I don't" he called after him "I know I don't" he said to himself slumping down in the chair by the fire and drifting off in the kind of deep thought that can only come with the maturity of being a fifth year.
The next day in charms Flitwick announced that this was going to be a student taught class, every student would think of a spell they could do well and perform it for the class. Sirius turned to shoot James a 'how trite' look but stopped when he saw a positively wicked smile spread across James' face.
"What exactly do you have planned?" Sirius asked hating to be left out of a good smirking.
"She thinks she so smart, does she? I'll show her!" James said determinedly to Sirius.
"What is he talking about?"
"His secret love for Lily." Lupin coolly said to an even more confused Sirius.
Johanna Depew went first, demonstrating a spell to remove unwanted hair and used Peter as her example. Sirius snickered and loudly wondered how she became so good at the spell. Lily went next demonstrating how to find out what the last spell a wand performed was. The class clapped in amazement as Johanna wand revealed the word 'absque'. James stood up knocking Helga out of the way and walked to the front of the class.
"And what spell will you be performing Mr. Potter?" Flitwick asked.
"I will be doing a non-verbal spell" he announced to a shocked class. "Then maybe Lily can tell us what I performed afterwards." James said inclining his head in a mocking way toward Lily.
"Oh yes! Yes! Mr. Potter yes! An excellent idea" Flitwick said in the high squeaky voice he used when something particular excited him.
James was practically glowing from the look Lily had on her face. The class grew quiet and their eyes widened, Sirius and Lupin weren't even breathing.
James focused on an old hat sitting on the top shelf and allowed the image of Charles and Lily kissing to enter his mind. The class was in awe as the hat began to rip itself to shreds. James looked over to Lily whose face had grown red, her eyes open as far as they could go as if there was no way she could have just seen this. She turned to James casting him a heartbreaking look.
"How could you James?" she choked out as the tears began to pour from her eyes. She stormed out of the classroom leaving everything behind. James stood there hardly believing it was him who had just done that. Of all the idiotic…he was suddenly aware at a class waiting for an explanation as he stood there alone on the platform in front of half his year. He jumped down and ran out the door after Lily. He had to find her, he had to tell her…what? What exactly was he going to say? He didn't know, he didn't care, he just had to find her. He finally caught up to her as she was sobbing in front of the entrance to Gryffindor tower, the fat lady seemed exasperated and kept asking for the pass word.
"Acacia Spirits" James shouted ushering Lily through the door. Lily turned infuriated that he could even come near her. She began hitting and screaming at him, tears streaming down her face.
"Why? How? The nerve… you bastard!"
James finally managed to pry her hands down and pulled her close to him in a tight hug as Lily fell limp. They fell down to floor and James brushed her hair away from her cheek whipping her tears off gently.
"Lily…I…I never meant to hurt you. When I saw you with Charles something inside of me just snapped." He explained in a soothing voice "I wanted it…no, I needed it to stop…I needed it to be me who you were walking with laughing with…I needed it to be me who you were kissing."
Lily pulled back stunned. She just looked at him. James stood up guiding her up with him, 'Merlin Beard she's beautiful' he thought anticipating fulfilling what he had wanted for so long but been so afraid of. He slid one hand around her waste and the other across her cheek to the back of her neck, pulled her in and kissed her hard. Lily let out a soft moan letting James know he was not the only one who had wanted this. Just then the common room door began to squeak open and Lily looking as though she had snapped back to reality, shot up and ran to the girl's dormitory. James sat there in shock as Lupin, Peter and Sirius raced in bombarding him with questions.
James ran down to breakfast really early that morning, he wanted to catch Lily before classes, but Lily didn't come down to breakfast. That morning she wasn't in charms or defense against the dark arts. A dull pain began pounding in James' chest.
'Why wasn't she there? Had he lost his only chance with her? Did she think he had told the guys what had happened?' a million questions raced through his mind.
The only relief he had was that she may make it to potions that afternoon, it was easily her best subject and Professor Slughorn always doted on her. James sat on the edge of his seat his eyes fixated on the door he felt his heart skip a beat every time the door creaked open. When Lily never came, the pain that had been building all day finally exploded.
"What happened? Where is she?" he exploded at Lupin after class.
"I don't know James, maybe you should ask Alice, they seem to be pretty chummy."
James took off to the common room to find Alice. He found her being pelted by chalk from peeves on the 3rd floor and pulled her aside.
"Alice? Where's Lily?" James demanded as chalk flew around them.
"James…this really isn't the time or the place."
"Don't give me that Alice I have to talk to her…Now!"
Alice pulled James into another hidden corridor. James became annoyed that the girls knew about hidden places he didn't but would have to question them later.
"Well where is she?"
A sullen look fell across Alice's face. She looked as though she was trying to figure the best way to tell James that the quidditch cup was cancelled.
"ALICE!"
"James…last night Fredrick and Lillian Evans…Lily's parents…"
James eyes grew wide…his mind pleaded that the ending wasn't going to be what he had predicted.
"They died last night James, Lily's aunt sent for her late last night."
James was in a daze. His heart hurt for Lily. He walked past Peeves throwing chalk, past a group of giggling second years pointing, and up to the common room past Sirius, Lupin and Peter till he reached his bed and collapsed on to it with a dull thud. His 3 friends came rushing into the room to see what had happened. After a short explanation the four of them sat there, sullen, not knowing what to say. Finally Sirius got up, he began to throw papers and robes out of his trunk till he found four butterbeers and a small bag. He handed each of them the drink, which James refused.
"James, you have to go to her" Sirius said.
"I thought of that already" James said "they'll never let me leave, it's impossible."
"Nothing's impossible" Sirius said as he handed James the small bag.
James looked up at Sirius "Thank you." He said as he got up and ran downstairs with the others following him.
James opened the bag reached in it and stepped into the fireplace.
"FREDRICK EVAN'S MANOR" he shouted as green flames sprung up around him.
James stepped out into a large white bathroom.
"Who are you?" a terrified voice demanded. A thin and very white child was standing with a shampoo bottle in hand as though it were a wand.
"Where is Lily Evans?" James demanded, he had no time for muggle foolery.
"What do you want with her?" the small child demanded.
"It is not your concern but I must find her."
"Petunia? Are you okay? Who are you talking to?"
"No one. Go away you freak." Petunia angrily retorted.
"Lily?" James shouted.
"James?" Lily replied "Alohamora"
The door swung open and Lily flew into James' arms. Petunia angrily threw the shampoo bottle down and walked out.
"How did you get here?" Lily sobbed into his shoulder.
"Sirius…it doesn't matter, Lily I'm so sorry."
Lily began to cry again. "Oh James, everything was going so right I was so happy yesterday, I wanted to tell you how much I needed you too, how I've needed you for so long…and then…"
"Shhh…we can talk later. Right now I am here. Whatever you need, I'm here."
