Title: Torn apart
Fandom: Lord of the Rings
Genre: None in particular
Rating: General
Disclaimer: They don't belong to me and I think it's better that way... you wouldn't like to see the outcome if I owned them and not Tolkien.
Summary: Frodo is about to go to the Havens and suddenly he's not sure anymore...
State: Complete
A/N: Some stories are really good or creative. Some are both. This one is probably neither and the title is way too dramatic for it. But it's true. Well, not true as in true, but these are real feelings that I felt less than a week ago. And as you shouldn't bottle feelings up, I wrote this, so please bear with me.
For Adrianne.
Torn apart
Frodo wandered through the streets of Hobbiton. He felt the familiar ground under his feet, smelled the air, heard the sounds of everyday life. He had never noticed them this intense. They had always been there, but nothing more. Just there. Normal. Now his bag was lying packed in Bagsend and all of a sudden he wasn't so sure anymore if he could really say farewell forever to all this.
He could feel tears in his eyes and started to walk faster. He didn't want the whole of Hobbiton see him crying.
It seemed to take forever to reach the house and open the door and when he finally slammed it shut behind him the tears were flowing.
"Are you all right, Mr Frodo?" Sam asked him.
"I don't know, Sam. I don't know if anything will ever be all right again."
"But you are going to the Undying Lands, Mr Frodo. With the Elves."
Frodo smiled. After all their adventures Sam still got excited over Elves.
"Yes, Sam, exactly."
He wasn't sure if Sam would understand how he felt even if he tried to explain it. Sam didn't feel this restlessness, this feeling that the Shire wasn't home anymore and that he had to go. Frodo felt it everyday, but at the same time he felt more attached to everything than ever before. It didn't feel right to leave this, but it didn't feel right to stay, either. And the choice was already made. Tomorrow he would leave this place forever. It tore him apart, made him want to cry and laugh at the same time.
Suddenly he became aware of Sam still standing there, waiting for him to say something. He took a deep breath and wiped the tears away.
"I'm all right, Sam. Thank you."
