Name: Second Hand White Baby Grand.
Writer: Ann.
Fandom: Smash.
Rating: PG13.
Summary: The Second Hand White Baby Grand just needs a second chance, and so does Ivy. And no matter what happens, she keeps hoping she'll get it.
Timeline: A few months after the S1 finale.
Disclaimer: All rights for Smash reserved NBC. I don't own anything.
My mother bought it second hand from a silent movie star.
It was out of tune, but I still I learned to play.
And with each note we both would smile, forgetting who we are,
And all the pain would simply go away.
Ever since she was a child, Ivy always wanted to be an actress. With her mother being a famous actress and singer, there was no way she wouldn't fall in love with the world that was everything for her mother before her daughter was born. She has gone to as many musicals she could get tickets to, and practiced every day of her life in order to be a great actress, even greater than her mother. Acting was all that Ivy ever wanted.
Those few months have been tough for her. After all this time in 'Heaven on Earth' with no real role in Broadway, she felt slightly drained, and sometimes even wondered if all the effort was really worth it. But every time she walked into an audition, despite her tiredness, there was hope floating all over her, and she pretended to be as fresh as she was when she started working in Broadway. Every time she did everything she could to get the job, but until 'Marilyn', or as it was later called, 'Bombshell', she didn't get any of the roles.
But no matter what happened, Ivy kept trying. Despite her mother's disapproval and lack of support, she kept going to every audition she thought she had a chance to pass… until she got to 'Bombshell', and was shocked to have found out that she won the part.
And then… then she lost it. At first to an actress who didn't deserve it, and later to the rival she thought she defeated earlier, Karen. On the moment of truth, her boyfriend, who just told her he loved her, abandoned her, and Ivy felt more broken and drained than she ever did. She lost everything, both her old job and the new big role that was supposed to be hers, for a small role in the same musical.
Closing her eyes, she took a couple more of her pills and leaned back, knowing she still has a few minutes before she will be called onstage for the first real show of 'Bombshell'. She let the pills affect her, and slowly smiled as she felt she was calming down and no longer caring about her life.
Opening her eyes, she looked at the mirror in front of her. Just like in every other time she took the pills, in front of her she saw Marilyn, not Ivy. It was the time of the drugs in Marilyn's – and Ivy's – life.
"Something second hand and broken still can make a pretty sound," Her voice was quiet and wistful, "even if it doesn't have a place to leave. The words are still unspoken now that mamma's not around, but that second hand white baby grand still has something beautiful to give."
"Ivy!" It was Derek's voice.
Knowing she still has a couple of minutes, Ivy still didn't get up. She just continued singing quietly, feeling the pain of the baby grand as if it was hers. Or maybe it really was hers. No one wanted her, no one but Tom and Derek. But even they eventually left her, and she remained alone, broken and unwanted.
"Ivy!"
She slowly got up and left the room, turning towards the stage. She left behind her her tired, broken heart and the hope for something good to happen to her. And behind her she could still hear her quiet voice expressing the one thing that constantly crossed her mind now.
I still have something beautiful to give.
