This was written in honor of Ranger's Birthday (hence the title, lol). I didn't edit to the best of my ability and was written very quickly, so excuse any and all mistakes.

Warning: Smut.

Not mine, but we already knew that.


"Are you sure you want to do this, white girl?" Lula asked me as we were perusing the Victoria's Secret racks.

"I'm positive."

She stopped me. "You could get your heart broken. Real bad."

I looked at her. Lula may be odd, but she always had my best interests at heart. "I know," I said. "But if I don't do anything, I'll spend the rest of my life wondering what could've happen."

She nodded and went back to looking for my outfit.

What was I doing?

I was going after my Batman.

My name is Stephanie Plum and I am Wonder Woman.

Okay, so not really, but I want to be her.

It's been five weeks since Joe and I officially broke up. The straw that broke the camel's back was after I left Ranger's and realized I'd rather be there or my apartment. Suddenly, Joe's didn't feel like home anymore. I stayed the evening and went home alone.

Where I have spent the last thirty five days celibate.

But now I was going to break my dry spell with a downpour of Cuban loving.

Whether that Cuban knew it or not.

"What about this?" Lula asked.

"Too pink."

"Nothing can be too pink."

"This is Batman we're talking about." I turned around and there it was. The outfit. The one that would make Ranger fall on his knees and thank God for its perfection.

Lula came up behind me. "Girl, that is the shit!"

I smiled. "I know."

Two days later, I was putting the finishing touches on my face. Best case scenario, Ranger likes what he sees and we take it up to seven and don't resurface for at least a week. Worst case, Ranger tells me he's not interested in my goods anymore and I leave with my pride hurt.

Actually, more than my pride would be hurt, but I didn't want to think about that.

Sighing, I deemed myself ready and put on the outfit. Today was August 12th, Ranger's birthday. Well, that's the birthday that he told me and the only answer I could get from the guys. And (hopefully) I was about to give Ranger the best birthday present ever.

As I arrived at RangeMan, Lula texted me luck and that Tank told her he was in the office. Showtime, I thought. I got out of the car and walked to the elevator.

"Hey, Beautiful," Lester said as he got off the elevator.

"Hi Lester."

"Coming to work?" He asked me

"Not today, maybe next week. I don't need rent money that bad."

"Move in with me and you won't need rent money."

I rolled my eyes and he grinned at me. Same old Lester.

I pushed five and waited for the doors to open. When they did, Tank was standing there.

"Hey Tank." I said.

"Hi Steph. Are you sure?" Tank, Lula and I were the only ones that knew about Ranger's surprise.

I nodded. "I love him."

He smiled. "That's all I needed to hear. I cleared his schedule, and the control room is holding all of his calls. The only distraction you'll guys will have is the building blowing up."

"Don't say that! It'll happen!"

Tank sniggered. He started to walk away, but came back. "Oh yeah," he whispered, "don't worry about the walls in case you guys don't make it upstairs. They're soundproof."

I blushed. "Thanks," I said. I walked down to his office and opened the door when he gave a curt 'Enter'.

"What do you want from me?" I wasn't sure where that came from, but I figured I could work with it.

He raised an eyebrow.

"Do you want me around for friendship? For a relationship? For a good screw? What?"

"Steph…"

"No, I need to know right now what you want from me?"

He got up and backed me into the door. "What do you want from me?"

"That's not fair. I asked you first."

His dark eyes drank me in. "Do I want you around for friendship? Yes because you are the best friend I have. For a relationship? Yes because we already have one. For a good screw?" He sighed. Crap. This was where he patted me on the head and told me that we couldn't have more. "Babe, we both know that you're better than a good screw.

"But I can't give you what you want."

"What?"

"I can't give you the ring, or children, or the house in the Burg."

"Did I ever say that I wanted those things?"

He just looked at me.

"Ranger, I love you. I don't want a ring or children and I definitely don't want a house in the Burg. I want you and the love, fidelity and support that you can give me. That only you can give me."

He pushed a curl out of my face. "Are you sure? Because if we start this, there is no going back."

I was never surer in my life. "As long as that goes for you too."

"You have my love, fidelity and support." He kissed me gently on the lips. "I'd love to continue this, but I have a lot of work to do." He sat back down in his chair.

"What's today?" I asked.

"Wednesday."

"What's the date?"

He raised an eyebrow.

I sighed. "Just play along."

This time he sighed. "It's the twelfth."

"And what's important about today?"

"I don't know, Steph, what."

"It's your birthday!" I jumped up once, clapping. He smiled at me.

"Thanks for remembering." He said.

"Aren't you going to open your present?" I asked.

He looked around me. "I don't see a present."

"You don't?"

His smile widened. "Are you the present?"

"Why I believe I am!" I giggled.

"You never disappoint." He said.

"Well, are you going to unwrap me?" I played with the buckle of my coat.

Ranger grinned, got up and locked the door. Oh boy, looks like we won't make it upstairs after all. He came over to me and took off my coat. "Babe," he breathed.

"I know that black is your favorite color." I said huskily.

He looked me up and down, and then nodded. "Black is definitely my color."

I led him over to the couch and sat him down. He put his hands on my hips and brought me down with him.

"Happy birthday, Carlos." I whispered into his ear before nibbling on the earlobe. His hands gripped me tighter and groaned.

"When do I get to unwrap the rest of my present?" He asked huskily.

I reached behind me and unclasped my bra and let it drop to the floor. "Whenever you're ready to."

He growled and placed me gently onto the floor with one of the throw pillows behind my head. His hands skimmed up my thigh high clad legs to the garter straps and unclasped them and removed the garter belt. He then reverently removed my thigh highs leaving me completely naked except for the scrap of cloth that Victoria's Secret called a thong.

Ranger kissed his way up my legs until he reached my hips. "I've always wanted to do this." He said, eyes black with lust piercing me. And then his beautiful white teeth grabbed the lacy thong and yanked.

Oh my God…he was taking my thong off with his teeth! If it was possible, I got even wetter.

He gently lifted my hips to continue to pull the cloth down my legs until they reached my feet where he proceeded to throw them with the already discarded bra. I moaned and opened my legs wider.

He climbed on top of me and kissed me for all it was worth. "There is nothing more beautiful than you, lying naked in the middle of my office."

I moaned again and silently thanked God that the blinds were shut. He gently picked me up and set me down on the couch.

I must have looked confused because he chuckled when he answered my unsaid question. "The only marks on your beautiful body will be mine. I don't want you to get rug burn."

"Good thinking, Batman." I said.

He pulled all of his clothes off, sat down next to me, and pulled me on to him.

"I want to watch you ride me with wild abandon." He said.

Christ, if his voice went any lower I was going to spontaneously orgasm!

I put my arms around his neck and started to glide my wetness on Ranger's throbbing cock. He moaned and let his head fall back. When I was ready to slide down onto Ranger's manhood, he stiffened.

"Protection." He said plainly.

"I'm on birth control. I get the shots that gives me periods every three months and I just got the shot."

He nodded and I went back to work. I chuckled to myself at the fact that Ranger was no longer thinking about anything.

I guided him inside of me and I moaned at the feeling of him hot and hard between my legs. He brought his head back up and watched me as I moved up and down in his lap.

"Christ." He said and I'm pretty sure he got harder.

He watched me, hands on my hips as I ground and circled his hips with mine. His right hand moved up and began to tweak my nipples while the other went down to my clit and rubbed it gently. I arched my back and took him deeper. We both groaned this time.

I sped up as my orgasm began to kindle and shouted out in climax when I felt him let his hot seed into me. I collapsed on top of him as I caught my breath.

"That was the best birthday present. Thanks, Babe."

I smiled. "You're welcome."

He gently kissed my forehead. "I love you." He said.

"Mmm, love you too." I replied. He chuckled and then I was out.

When I woke up again, we were in Ranger's bed and he was gently kissing my stomach.

"What are you…?"

"You didn't think you'd get off that easily, did you?" He asked with his wolf grin in place. He ducked under the covers and returned to kissing my stomach, my hips, my thighs, my…

OMIGOD!

The End.