bTitle:/bFlinch
bAuthor:/b kai-li-beautifulsuccess
bRating:/b PG/PG-13
bDisclaimer:/b These characters do not belong to me; I am merely borrowing them to put them in situations the show's writers won't. Please don't sue me.
bWarning:/b Extreme uses of literary devices and an odd writing style that might be impossible to read. Unbetaed.
bSummary/Author's Note:/b Gabriel and Sam conspire to get Cas and Dean together on a cruise. Written for lj user="tiptoe39"'s prompt "I Want a Boyfriend Too! A Trap on a Luxury Cruise Ship!" I hope you enjoy this, tippy!
Dean kept glancing surreptitiously at the couple making eyes at each other across the ship. He couldn't help but think that they looked a little too cozy, a thought that made him cringe. At the same time, deep down where it wouldn't be acknowledged, he felt a pang of jealousy. Irritated, he pulled out his phone, fingers punching angrily at the buttons until he finished, looking triumphantly at the couple once more. When two minutes passed and neither had pulled a phone out, his lips pursed, his brow furrowed, and his boots stomped angrily as he definitely did inot/i storm to one of the ship's bars.
Sam smiled at Gabriel, leaning in carefully. "This is not going to work. Eventually he's going to realize there's no monster on the ship, and then he'll just be pissed." His phone buzzed in his pocket and both men smiled, pointedly ignoring it and the sender glaring across the deck.
"Calm down, Sasquatch. Maybe he'll figure it out, and maybe he'll decide it's time to make a move." Eyebrows raised and Gabriel acknowledged the look with a sheepish grin. "And maybe Godzilla will start rampaging on the ship. Okay, okay... What say you and I go enjoy some time 'investigating' a nice linen closet?"
"Gabriel said they are investigating something right now. He will let me know what they find once they are finished."
Dean waited a full thirty seconds before allowing himself to swallow the mouthful of whiskey burning its way through the flesh of his cheek. A deep breath and he felt ready to speak.
"Cas..."
"Dean."
"What have I told you about sudden appearances?"
His head cocked, Cas studied Dean a moment before answering. "You do not like them. They make you want to bust a cap in someone's ass." His hand crossed the distance and gently prodded a stubbled cheek. Where Dean had felt the sting of raw flesh and whiskey, instead he felt sudden warmth and a hint of tart honey on his tongue. "I am sorry. I will try harder not to startle you."
"Okay." They were standing too close and Dean suddenly needed to be back on deck, a wide expanse of ocean surrounding him. "See that you do."
Cas remained standing in the bar after Dean left, his hand on the cooling bar stool. His eyes were almost closed, but something about them burned.
"They aren't investigating anything, Cas." Dean looked at the angel in front of him, noting the widening of blue eyes and an attempt at innocence. "But you knew that, didn't you? What's going on here?"
"Well, Dean, you see..." Cas paused, grimacing. His mouth opened, closed, lips pressed tightly together, opened again. "They said you would not understand. Then they told me that I would not understand either. I do not yet know if they are right."
"First things first... Where are they?"
"A linen closet on the third deck."
"You can't be serious." Neither set of eyes blinked and, for a moment, Dean felt swallowed by the blue depths of Castiel's gaze. Shaking himself out of it, he scowled. "Okay, you are serious. In that case, I do understand. I understand an archangel's got some 'splaining to do."
"Dean-o? We're ho-ome!" Dean jumped at Gabriel's bellow, spinning to glare at the smirking angel and his brother. "I've got a feeling we need to have a chat, you and I. Sam, I'm sure you and Cas have something you could gab about. The ship's bar has a fantastic grasshopper. I think you'd both enjoy one." Fingers snapped and their brothers were suddenly elsewhere. Eyes sparking, Gabriel turned to Dean and waited for the explosion.
It didn't come. The words out of Dean's mouth were calm, inquisitive.
"How long?"
"Since he got out of the hole." There's no anger, none of the suspicion Gabriel had anticipated. Simply acceptance. "When he first came back, Dean, he wasn't whole. Things happened down there that even you can't imagine. He's needed..." Smaller hands waved, searching for the right word. "...healing that you just can't give him."
Dean nodded, eyes hooded and closed off. "I get it, Gabe. Why didn't he tell me?"
"Are you kidding, Sunshine? You hate chick flick moments, and that one would have been a doozy! Of everything he's scared of, losing you is highest on the list, you big lughead。"
Another nod, lips pressed tightly together. Years of denying that things like hugs and talking mattered would do that. "Okay. Now that I know, where do we go from here? I'm tired of secrets and whispering and not being able to know if you're telling the truth. Honestly, Gabriel, I'm just tired, man. I'm ready for something to fall into place because things don't do that for me." Gabriel looked ready to say something but Dean cut him off.
"This isn't easy. It's never been easy. I bitch and moan about it, but I never really complain, because that's life. You're born, it's hard, there's good, there's bad, and you die. Except for us Winchesters. We seem to just keep on ticking, forever. When does something good happen for me?
A throat cleared behind him, and Dean started at the gravel he could recognize as grace filtering through human vocal cords. As always, he ignored the way his skin prickled at the sound, subtly rearranging itself along his spine.
"Dean, I think it is time we had a talk."
He turned, surprised to see Castiel standing alone in the doorway, Sam's bulk absent. "What is this? The share and care hour?"
Castiel ignored the words, his attention on his brother.
"Sam is waiting for Gabriel." His head tilted minutely, precisely, towards the archangel. "He said you would know where he is. Do not worry; I have this." Gabriel nodded, a reassuring smile on his face, before disappearing.
"Cas, you don't have to do this. Seriously." His eyelashes fluttered, weighted with moisture he refused to acknowledge and give meaning to. Again he was struck by what lay behind the angel's eyes before turning away. "Our brothers can have their little vacation and then we'll go back to hunting. I'm fine."
Castiel was next to him, dangerously close inside his personal bubble, fingertips roughly brushing at shrugging shoulders.
"Cas, please, I'm fine." Words forced past lips, tone no longer cocksure adn easy, but pleading, begging for something. iGo away/i, eyes pleaded, inever leave my side/i, a strong jaw clenched, iI can't keep going on this way./i
"No." The words denied Dean's weakness, his pleas, his guilt and shame and outright belief that no matter what he deserved to be alone. "No." That head tilted to the side again, startling blue eyes open wide, but instead of simply watching the broken man in front of him, Castiel claimed him.
Dean was given no opportunity to refuse the angel invading his mouth, his space, his ieverything/i. That wasn't important. As he let himself go, allowed the angel access to everything, he found his own sense of grace. It didn't have the all-powerful, all-healing presence of Castiel's, but it was everything he needed. That it was flawed and pained and still did its best made it his, and that made it perfect.
The clash (could it really be seen as a kiss if it was violent and hard and unyielding) ended surprisingly slowly, both men swimming reluctantly to the surface of the emotional riptide. Dean stood there a moment longer, reveling in the combination of his imperfect grace and Castiel's before tearing himself away, wordlessly. Good things didn't happen to him and he wasn't ready for God's idea of a joke. He crashed into an angel that hadn't been in the doorway a second before, almost falling down from the rebound. Arms of steel latched onto his own, holding him up, one hand forcing him to look Castiel directly in the eye. He wasn't even allowed to close his own eyes, as Castiel actually growled menacingly every time he tried.
"Dean, I know I do not understand everything about humans and being human, but that does not mean you do not have to listen to me. You owe me that much, at least." The struggles stopped and Cas released his iron grip, running his finger over the prickly jawbone before letting his arms fall limply to his sides. "You think this is a joke. You do not believe that I do anything on my own anymore. After... everything that has happened... you still have so little faith in me?"
"This has nothing to do with my faith in you, Cas, and everything to do with the fact that I know that dicks you work for... with... whatever. The point is, I know them and they won't be okay with any of this. So why bother?"
"I am the new sheriff in town." Icy eyes bored into him, the words sounding formal and strange. "That is what you said, right? That means I am in charge. If I go by what our Father does, then that means I get to do what I want. And, after all this time, I have found someone to want."
"What about when it all falls apart and goes to Hell, Cas? What am I supposed to do once you realize I'm not worth it and go back?" Castiel's mouth opened, but Dean continued speaking, his voice breathless and rushed. "Life is hard. I know that. I've lived that. I also know it has its beautiful moments, people who are supposed to make it all worth it. And I have that. You, Sammy, sometimes even Gabriel. But if I change anything-
"I just don't know how to live differently, Cas. What if I do it wrong and you don't come back one day?"
"You would not believe me if I say that won't happen. You do not see the good man you are and what that means. And so the only thing I can promise you is that there won't be secrets, you will know when I will leave and when I will come back, and I will love you as long as you let me."
They stared at each other, sincerity, disbelief, hope, even sadness almost tangible. A human hand, strong and callused, lifted, dropped heavily onto a wiry shoulder and clutched convulsively. A more graceful, angelic even, hand responded by rising to cup a chiseled face, the motion pleading but undemanding. Slowly, they came together, moving as if trapped in honey, the angel desperate not to startle, the man still waiting for the joke's reveal.
When lips touched lips, finally, it was not gentle, barely loving. No. It was needy and angry and selfish and harsh. They would get around to figuring out that other part. Right then, they needed the primal.
Gabriel stopped pacing abruptly, hazel eyes glazed and focused inside. At first, he just stood there, frowning grumpily. Sam watched him from a sun-bleached lounge chair, lap top whirring as he did some research. Suddenly, Gabriel smiled, swooping down for a triumphant kiss.
"Your bigt brother's martyr complex is going to end up making people very unhappy if he doesn't figure out how to let himself be happy every now and then." Another kiss. "Luckily for him, my little bro has decided to start teaching him."
The lap top clicked shut as Sam stood up, frowning at Gabriel when the entire ship trembled minutely at his step.
" 'M not ithat/i big!"
The archangel smirked, grabbed his hulking hunter, and snapped them to the ship's arcade.
"Now that the first act is over, Sammy-boy, I think it's time we fully enjoy this cruise. It's not every day we get any kind of vacation."
A scream shattered the relatively calm air of indolence aboard the ship. The arcade supervisor's radio crackled as someone informed the crew that it appeared Godzilla had shown up on deck and was stomping around, terrifying the passengers and most of the crew.
Sam's eyebrow raised. "Seriously, dude. What is it with you and Godzilla?"
Gabriel smiled as he kissed Sam, a memory prickling inside his head. "I just have some great Godzilla memories, what can I say?" His fingers snapped loudly and silence descended over the cruise ship. Sometimes, the Trickster just couldn't help it...
