Title: Wizards of the Caribbean: Time is on our Side

Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this story (really, I even stole the puzzle that comes later on). All characters are either real pirates from the time period, characters based on Pirates of the Caribbean, or the beautiful brain children of J.K. Rowling. I write for pleasure and the entertainment of the readers and make no money what so ever.

Warnings: Very short scenes of violence, drinking, pillaging and other pirate activities. Also a scoop of cunnilingus and intercourse to give a break to the actual plot.

Summary: Stuck together on a mission for the Ministry of Magic to replace the time turners, a quick trip to a sunny beach turns into a very long trip back in time. Stuck in the realm of petticoats and pirates, Hermione and Draco have to find their way back home without being made to walk the plank.

Notes: Thank you, thank you, thank you to my delightful beta ivory88s. You put up with me sending you 3 chapters at a time and promising to get it done much sooner than it actually did as well as hammering down on my significant misuse of periods over commas. I also have to thank Sarah, who was my go to gal for pirate knowledge and helped push for plot that actually made some sense. Oh, and the delightful mods that run the Dramione remix. They do a great job and gave me the Prompt. Just a side note: The point of the remix is to take existing famous couples and use the stories (to whatever extent you wish) with a Hermione/Draco relationship. I chose Will and Elizabeth from Pirates of the Caribbean.

Chapter One: Welcome to Port Royal

Port Royal. The name was carved into a wooden sign to welcome happy tourists to the magnificent southern shoreline of Jamaica. Amid the dark skinned natives with braided hair tucked into colourful tams and lighter skinned foreigners busy snapping photos were two figures that stood out significantly. One young woman thought it would be funny to take a picture of the crazy couple in all black clothes walking down the sidewalk that separated the street from the beach. She was disappointed to find out that not only did the photo not take, but the camera seemed to have stopped working altogether. A sly smile played on the pale lips of the taller of the two figures when the woman exclaimed in a frustrated tone that her batteries just died.

"Granger?" The taller one started, stealing a side glance at his companion who waited silently for him to continue. "What are batteries?"

The woman he was walking with stayed quiet until they had passed a gathering of people that were ogling over a steel drum player set up in the walkway. "Batteries create electricity to power muggle devices. But I'm going to assume that whatever you just did to her camera has

nothing to do with the batteries." She suddenly stepped off the sidewalk and into the sand. Grains began collecting in her shoes but she didn't make any mention of it. The same could not be said for the man that followed, who had previously been grinning in response to her astute assessment.

"Granger, why are we doing this? We are out here in the middle of the day, garnering more attention than the blokes wearing dresses at the Quidditch World Cup." Though he was whining, he was keeping close enough to Hermione to whisper. Her eyes darted back and forth, clearly more preoccupied with finding or avoiding something.

"Hold still," she told him. She stood so that their sides nearly touched, most of the beach goers were at their backs. She reached into the folds of her robes and pulled out a wand. Rather than risk muttering a spell on a muggle beach, the woman stared at the wand lying flat in her palm as if sending and receiving thoughts with it. The length of wood wiggled in her hand and turned just to the left, pointing further along the beach. "We're nearly there," she whispered before pocketing the wand again, "There is a strong trace just up ahead."

"You didn't answer my question," the man reminded her.

Hermione rolled her eyes but humored him with a response. "We are here to collect sand for the new time turners." He knew that already, and she knew that he knew, but it was well worth repeating herself to see lines of agitation crease the corners of his mouth and eyes. "Calm down, Malfoy. We both put in requests to travel and we got what we wanted." Neither of them wanted to be too busy working to enjoy such a gorgeous location, least of all with each other, but someone upstairs had put them both on the assignment.

Knowing as much, Malfoy kept his mouth shut for the remainder of their jaunt down the beach and tried to ignore the near-white sand that was sticking to his socks and trousers. Eventually they came to a gathering of various rocks that encircled a small stretch of sand. Vibrant paint had been used to write graffiti on them, but underneath that, unremarkable symbols had been carved into the stone. Hermione had pulled out a small notebook and was copying them down.

Draco looked down with disinterest on the small sea creatures that were residing inside the tide pool within the circle and then saw that Hermione had taken her wand back out and was casting various spells on the sand. She was significantly better than he when it came to Charms, so she had been entrusted with the actual extraction of the magical sand. Malfoy was meant to keep watch and aid if necessary.

Turning away from Hermione, Malfoy quickly scanned the surrounding area. Not many bothered to come this far down the beach. He wondered if any charms were put on the area to keep muggles away. Of course, they couldn't utilize the magical sand they were gathering even if they did happen upon the ordinary spot; however, the Ministry was overly precautious about almost everything. "Aren't you done yet?" Malfoy barked. They had had to walk the entire way from the hotel they were staying in so as not to attract attention and he was tired of this process; he felt as though it was taking longer than needed.

He had expected a snappy retort, but instead there was a crash of a fresh wave followed by an irritated screech. Malfoy whipped around and drew his wand in one fluid motion, but he quickly put it away when he saw that what Hermione really needed was a towel. He let out a deep chuckle at her wet dog look. "If you worked faster that could have been avoided," he chastised, stepping a little further away from the edge of the water. Hermione gave him her ugliest look, but continued her wand waving.

In no time at all Hermione was standing at her full height with a golden chain clutched in her fingers. The hour glass that hung in the middle of the golden hoop in the center of the chain was full of fresh sand that gave off a little shimmer as if it were glowing faintly. "I've finished them all," she announced, motioning to several identical necklaces that she had just tucked into her robes.

"Great, now give it here." Before anything could be done to stop him, Malfoy had slung the chain around his neck and held up the hour glass before his eyes. "I need to go back a few hours to catch up on the sleep that this whole adventure has made me miss." While it was late in the evening back in London, Hermione didn't agree with his thoughts.

"Let's just lea-" Her statement was cut short as she saw Malfoy's pale fingers begin twisting the hour glass. Once… Twice… "NO!" Hermione grabbed hold of the man's robes with only her wrists and hands within the circle of chain, but it was enough. Malfoy twisted the dial quickly between his thumb and pointer finger, each time causing the center to spin faster and faster.

They were able to keep from toppling over despite Hermione throwing herself at him, but around them were blurry images of beachgoers moving in reverse. Something didn't seem quite right about it though. Hermione watched with narrowed eyes as the smeared world around them grew darker and lighter. The seconds ticked by and still time flew backwards all around. In all the uses she had gotten out of the time turner in her third year, it had never taken this long. Something was seriously wrong.

A/N: Thoughts? It's already finished and I'll wind up posting the whole thing in good time (as I recall, there are nearly 30 chapters), but I'd like to know what folks that weren't part of the fest think.