Third in my Perfect series. In which Alex needs a shrink and K unit lend a hand.
Rated T for strong language and violence.
Read Perfectly Normal and Normally Perfect first!

Disclaimer: Any recognizable works are not my own. Alex Rider and his universe belong to Anthony Horowitz.

This story was inspired by 'Somalian Fallout' by RugitusAstra. If you like this story, go read theirs!


"Mr. San Luca? I have some information about what we discussed a few days ago."

"Already? Wow, SO works fast," Wolf replied over the phone, "What have you got, Mrs. J?"

"A British man, though he's living in America at the moment. Supposedly he's at the top of his field."

"And does he have the clearance level?"

"He certainly will, I'll have to pull some strings with the CIA, but it shouldn't be a problem. He's worked for the CIA and FBI before, as well as the Pentagon."

"And then what? Will he come back to London?"

"Oh no, probably not. Most likely you'll have to go to him. Don't worry, I'll put you in contact with a CIA liaison. She'll get everything in order. You just worry about Alex."

"Not a problem, Mrs. Jones. I always worry about Alex."

Wolf heard a soft laugh over the receiver.

"Don't we all?"


Wolf almost felt bad, going behind Cub's back like this. But Cub was always so evasive. The kid had the rare skill of being able to talk and talk and never actually tell you anything.

Wolf knew that the kind of help Cub needed was high above what K unit could provide. This was the only solution. Sorry kid - but not really.


"What do you mean you found me a psychologist?" Cub ground out, but his voice held little bite.

"I mean what I said, Cub. We found you a psychologist,. Well, a psychiatrist technically - an actual doctor!" Wolf retorted. "I hear he's supposed to be brilliant."

"Supposed to be? That's reassuring, "Cub snarked sarcastically. "We're really going to make the hop, skip, jump over the pond just to meet this guy?" he continued incredulously, "and anyway, how many times do I have say it before you get it through your thick skulls? I don't need a shrink!" Cub nearly shouted, trademark scowl on his face.

"I mean, Cub. You kind of do," Eagle commented. Then backtracked upon seeing the fury rise in the Cub's eyes. "I mean, we all see shrinks, Cub! And our jobs aren't half as crazy as yours."

Cub scoffed and continued scowling, "I'm not fragile."

"Yeah, well, you're not immortal either. And Morocco took it's toll."

"We just want you to try it, Cub. One session, please?" Fox pleaded. "And if you really don't think it'll help, you don't have to go back."

Cub ran a hand through his already ruffled hair, "You guys are really gonna drag this out, huh?"

"Yep," four voices chimed in unison.

Cub let out an exasperated "fine," inducing a cheer from everyone present. "But only so you'll all shut up about it."

K unit exchanged triumphant smiles, high fives all around.

Cub's scowl lessened, but only slightly. Wolf couldn't tell, but he guessed Cub was rolling his eyes. Cub then pushed his sunglasses slightly up his nose, the mirrored lenses reflecting the unit as they celebrated.

"One more condition, though," Cub cut into their celebratory high fives.

The unit eyed Cub warily, wondering what spy shit he was about to pull.

"I'm not on dinner duty tonight."

As Cub was the only member of the unit who was even remotely talented at cooking, this was a punishment worse than death.

Wolf watched Eagle skim his eyes over the rooms occupants before shouting, "not it!"

Wolf copied him, quickly followed by Snake.

"Not- oh shit," Fox said, just a microsecond too late.


To Alex, watching the horror spread over Fox's face almost made up for the shrink session he'd have to endure. Almost.

But anyway, it was only one session. How bad could it really be?

Then again, he was Alex Rider. With his track record, he really shouldn't test his luck.

What did they call it? Tempting fate?


"So this shrink," Alex said through a mouth full of takeout pizza (because there was no way in hell Fox was going to cook, not after the incident), "he won't be anything like Flint, from BB, will he?"

"Rest assured, Cub," Wolf said, pointed at him with the tip of his pizza slice, "we would never put you at the mercy of that idiot again."

"Great, what about Doctor Torres? Anything like her? Because if I'm honest, I'm a little tired of talking circles around people who are supposed to be professionals."

"Don't worry, kiddo," Fox slugged Alex in the arm, almost causing him to drop his pizza, "this psychiatrist is supposed to be a real brainiac."

"Mmhm," Eagle mumbled in agreement. "Young too. Young and bright and top of his field, remind you of anyone?"

"No, who?" Alex asked, straight faced, his sunglasses adding to the poker face effect.
K unit laughed at Alex's antics.

"But seriously, Cub," Snake said, "you might even like this one."

"Pft, I'd better. I'm taking a 6 hour flight just to meet him. Not exactly a cheap first date."


Alex sat cross-legged on his bed, duvet pulled up in a cocoon around him.

His duffel bag sat in front of him, filled with half heartedly folded clothes.

He had finished packing the regular holiday essentials; toiletries, clothing, electronics, books. Now it was time for the less common travel items; gun, bullets, bulletproof clothes, panic button, bug sweep and any other gadgets he felt necessary.

For some reason though, he couldn't bring himself to continue packing. Alex had laid one hand on his disassembled handgun and had felt faint. His stomach had rolled and Alex had collapsed on his bed, and there he remained, glaring at the pieces of metal before him.

All of a sudden, the fluttery feeling in Alex's stomach felt unbearable.

He abandoned the warmth of his blanket and stumbled into his en-suit bathroom. Reaching up, Alex tugged the aviators from his face. The harsh light of the bathroom blinded him for a moment. Alex paused, squeezing his eyelids shut. Colourful spots danced in front of his vision, like a dozen shooting stars in a black night sky.

He braced himself on the sink and looked into his fever-bright eyes. He was so sick of seeing that vulnerable expression on his own face.


Dear Reviewers, any criticism or tips are always welcome! I don't usually respond unless you ask me too (I love chatting, but I don't want to bug anyone that doesn't need or want a reply), but I read and consider every review. At the end of each chapter I sometimes put a little part responding to some reviews - just if I'm not able to respond in privet, or if it's about something more than one person had mentioned.

Next Chapter: Time for a fun family vacation! Though Alex might beg to differ.