Ben gripped the nearest cabinet as he steadied himself to his feet. Even this simple task made the recently rescued man feel light-headed. He knew being assaulted by the dark side of the Force could cause mental and physical exhaustion, but he'd never been a casualty of these effects before. Still, he'd been lying around all day like a lazy Hutt; sooner or later he had to start moving around.
Opening the door of his cramped chamber, Ben walked into one of the hallways in the Falcon. He stood there a moment, deliberating where he should go. Ben considered walking to the cockpit to see where the coordinates were taking them, but he didn't want to push his already hinging luck with Poe by arousing suspicions as to what he was doing there. Ben had seen the way that pilot stared at him with distrust, which was quite the polar opposite of the way Rey looked at him.
Rey, Ben thought. I should see Rey.
There were a number of chambers with bunks on the Falcon, all located on the same corridor (of course, these were additions Leia had insisted Han install after Ben had been born: "It's not just you and Chewie gallivanting across the galaxy any more!"). With any luck, Rey would be residing in one of them. Choosing the chamber closest to his, Ben knocked.
"Yes?" he heard Rey reply on the other side.
Ben let out a small sigh. At least he hadn't picked the wrong one. "It's Ben," he said. "May I come in?"
There was a slight pause, followed by a hesitant "Yes," Ben opened the door, eager to sit down again, right as Rey said "Give me a moment,"
Ben froze, but it was too late. The door was cracked open wide enough that he could see Rey sitting cross-legged on the cot, her arms exposed while the wraps she always wore lay crumpled on the ground.
Ben had never seen a person with so many scars.
Rey reflexively rubbed her arms as self-consciousness crept over her. She wasn't used to others seeing her without the wraps. In fact, the only others who had were medical personnel on Jakku.
"I-I'm sorry," Ben started to close the door. "I'll wait outside,"
"No!" Rey said quickly. "You can stay," After all this time, it was almost a relief to have somebody else know. Besides, how could she kick Ben out? Rey heard the words he'd uttered in her ear the previous night before she fell asleep. She knew she meant something to him, but she hadn't realized his feelings ran so deep. Perhaps Ben's confession of love was some aftermath of shock from the visions leashed on him. Then again, what if they weren't?
Rey shifted on her cot so Ben would have a place to sit. "Come in," Ben entered hesitantly as Rey picked up one of the wraps and began to cover her left arm.
"It happened when I was fourteen," she explained. "I was on one of my first solo scavenger missions. As children we'd scavenge in groups, but adolescents are expected to work on their own so as to cover more territory.
"I was looting an old Star Destroyer…well, half of a Star Destroyer," Rey corrected. "When it had been blown out of the sky the other half landed three miles south. Anyway, it had been up-ended, sticking diagonally out of the sand dunes. Certain areas couldn't even be maneuvered without climbing gear. I was putting the gear together near one of these drop-offs when I slipped,"
Rey fastened the ends of her wrap, and then looked at her right arm. Some of the scars were light and had faded with time, while others were deeper and darker.
"I caught myself on some jutted edges on the way down. This slowed me somewhat, but when I hit the bottom I landed on one of my legs. But scratching my arms and breaking my leg from the fall wasn't the worst of it," Rey looked up at Ben. "Have you heard of blazele?" Ben shook his head. "I hadn't heard of it before that day either. It's an infectious fungus, and it was widespread across the bottom of the spacecraft. You see, the fungus had gotten into my wounds. If I'd sanitized my arms as soon as I landed in it, I probably would have been fine. But I was stuck at the bottom of the shaft for hours until one of the head scavengers realized I hadn't checked in and sent someone to look for me. By then the poison had already settled. I didn't even know anything was wrong until I'd emerged into the sunlight and my arms began to burn,"
Rey reached down and picked up the second bandage. "So that's why I keep them covered," she said. "Not out of shame, but because I have to. Even after all these years the scars still hurt when they're exposed to bright natural light,"
Rey looked over at Ben, who was now looking contemplatively at her scars. What was going through that mind of his? She wished she knew. Then, carefully, Ben slid his hands under her right arm and gingerly lifted it up, tracing his finger along the crescent-shapes.
"Does this hurt?" he asked.
Rey felt herself blush. "No,"
Ben lifted her arm to his lips and kissed one of the marks, then another. As he did this Rey couldn't help but smile. She'd never thought of those scars to be anything but an impediment, but here Ben was making it feel like a thing of beauty.
It was in that moment of complete acceptance Rey realized she loved him too.
[Hello again! If you're interested in another spinoff from "To Love a Sith", I've written a new story, "The Vision in His Arms"]
