A/N: The 'You' in this refers to Jackson.
This is dedicated to Patty who I feel really deserves a happy ending when it comes to this particular pairing.
Thanks a million to gimmexsomexJacksonxWalsh who beta'd this for me…And gave me some wonderful insight!:D
Please read and review
x
First Time Ever I Saw Your Face
You never realized how beautiful he was before.
(You must have been blind.)
Asking people out was never really your thing. It's not that you were nervous or that you didn't feel confident enough, you just hated the whole first date thing. You hated asking about their family and siblings, what their favourite food was, what school or college they went to, what they feared for in the uncertain economic future ahead of us.
Blah. Fucking. Blah.
But with him, it had been so different.
Having drank with him for nearly three months before you asked him out for a proper date meant that you already knew all about his background. Not that he revealed everything about his past, but a very loose lipped, tipsy Adam Barton had been more than happy to fill you in with all the mundane details.
And you were pretty sure that Aaron Livesy wasn't really one for caring about a persons past so he didn't really have need to ask you any silly questions either.
No, you had both dived right in and asked each other the things you really wanted to know.
(Would Rafa return to Liverpool? Was there a difference between Magners and Bulmers? Why were Walkers called Lays in Europe? If Wayne Rooney ruled the world, would things be better or worse?')
You know, the vital information, the questions that involved hypothetical life or death situations.
You hated first dates, but Aaron made you love them.
'I never really saw you and Aaron as a couple…' Adam mumbled, sipping his tea and watching you curiously.
You shrug and continue to munch on your bacon buttie.
'Why not? Because I'm so astoundingly handsome?'
Adam snorted.
'No, because he's so astoundingly boring!'
You raise an eyebrow and give Adam a sharp nudge with your elbow.
'Don't be mean. Anyone would think that you were jealous and that you secretly fancied me!' You tease.
Adam snorts with laughter again and rolls his eyes.
'Please mate, don't flatter yourself, because you're insulting me.'
Ugh… First kisses…. Definitely NOT your strong point…
It's not that you're a bad kisser, it's just your heart would start to beat too fast and your mouth would go all dry and you'd be absolutely terrified that your were swirling your tongue round and round like a washing machine…
But with Aaron it had kind of just happened naturally. There hadn't been that awkward moment where you both know what's coming but your both too scared to move in first and close the distance between you.
You had just been laughing on the sofa, watching a movie when your heads had bumped and before you knew what was coming he had gently and smoothly covered his mouth with yours. It had been a warm, wet kiss, your favourite! You could smell Aaron's aftershave and his hair gel and whatever shaving foam he had used to achieve such a soft, stubble free finish.
It wasn't over too soon but it hadn't been drawn out for too long. It was just perfect and when you pulled away there was no awkward laugh, no flushed cheeks and heaving chests, just the two of you looking into each other's eye intently, searching for some answer that you honestly believed you could find in him.
'I-I don't usually just latch myself onto blokes like that.' Aaron said quickly, his blue eyes searching yours frantically.
You nodded and went in for another kiss but Aaron moved away.
'I've got to get back to Smithy…'
'So…he's a good kisser then?' Adam asked, chewing his sandwich thoughtfully.
You nod and sip your coke shyly.
'He really is… It was so smooth and James-Bond-like.'
Adam rolls his eyes in that annoying way of his and smiles bemusedly.
'I don't know why but picturing Aaron being all smooth and nerve free when it comes to the lads just doesn't work for me… The whole running back to Smithy sounds more like our boy.'
You shake your head and take another mouthful of Coke.
'Yeah… But he knows what he's doing Adam, I can tell you that much.'
Adam grimaced and shook his head.
'Oh God, please don't, Jackson.'
Aaron wasn't the type for holding hands in public and you had to admit that you weren't really either. You hated it when couples were all over each other in front of the general public. You just couldn't understand how those people couldn't just smile at each other in a knowing way, mentally saying 'Oh just wait until I get you home!'
So when Aaron took your hand and caressed the back of it with his soft, skilled fingers, you looked at him in shock.
'What are you doing?' you hissed, your eyes scanning the street to see if anyone else noticed.
Aaron smiled bemusedly and shrugged his shoulders.
'I just want to hold your hand. What's the big deal?'
You frown for a second and then laugh.
'There isn't one! It's just…I thought we were going to keep it quiet with the PDA's, y'know?'
Aaron shakes his head and raises your hand to his lips, never taking his eyes off of yours.
'I really like you Jackson.'
You smile widely.
'You're alright…I suppose…'
'I really, really like him Adam! And he really likes me too! Ah! It's just too perfect, you know?' You exclaim, throwing yourself down on the bed beside Adam.
'Aw…' he says in a bored tone, never once taking his eyes off of the T.V. in front of him.
You hit him playfully and smile broadly at him.
'I actually think your jealous! You have no one to have sex with tonight and you know that Aaron and me do! It's driving you crazy!' You tease.
Something flashes in Adam's eyes dangerously, something you haven't seen before.
'I could sleep with someone tonight if I wanted to.' He snaps.
You pat his shoulder and smile at him, a softer, kinder smile.
'Delusion is an awful thing, mate.'
Adam rolls his eyes and offers you a tight smile.
'Isn't it just Jay? Nothing ever seems to be as perfect as one thinks it is.'
Sex.
Sex with Aaron was different to sex with anyone else. You felt like he could see right through to your soul, his intense blue eyes watching yours at all time, that inquisitive look on his face, as though he always had a question on the tip of his tongue.
He leant his forehead against yours, closing his eyes shut for a moment and you knew he was close.
'I love you.' You whisper, feeling brave, even though you were naked.
Aaron's eyes shoot open and he jaw drops slightly.
'Really?' he gasps.
You nod and give him a small smile.
'I love you too…' he promised, his eyes searching yours once again.
You crash your lips against his and finish together.
You can't believe how lucky you are.
'He loves me!' You chuckle, throwing an arm around Eames.
Adam stiffens beneath you and he slowly pushes you away, an ashen look on his face.
'What?' he choked.
You grin and nod happily, oblivious to his down heartedness.
'He loves me! He told me last night!'
Adam shakes his head and looks the other way.
'Congratulations mate.'
You bite your lip and frown a little.
'Wow. Your enthusiasm is nearly too much. What's up?'
Adam shakes his head and forces a wide smile.
'Nothing. I'm happy for you two, really.'
You sigh with relief and smile back at him.
'Thank God, for a second there I thought you were going to tell me that you love me too!'
Romance.
You never were one for roses and candles and all that jazz, but Aaron did it all so different from any other guy you'd ever been with.
You watched in shock as he got down on one knee, sacrificing his lovely Nike tracksuit, kneeling in the muck just for you. You clamp your hand over your mouth as you realize what's happening.
He looks into your eyes curiously, opening the small, black box slowly.
'Is this what you want?' he whispers.
You nod quickly, forgetting to ask if it's what he wanted as well.
'Yes! Yes!' You squeal, very nearly hopping up and down on the spot.
'Okay.' He muttered, his brown eyes still searching, still asking a question that he had never verbalized.
'Will you marry me?' he asked softly.
'YES! YES!' You shrieked, running over to him and throwing yourself into his arms, knocking him backwards onto the ground, the joy and the happiness nearly too much to bear.
'I LOVE YOU!' You yelled joyously.
'I love you too… he whispered.
'He asked me to marry him.' You whisper into Adam's ear as Aaron explains to Ryan why the engine of the van wont start.
Adam suddenly kicks over a tool box with one swift move of his boot.
'Oi! Clean it up!' Ryan orders.
But Eames isn't look at him; he's looking at Aaron, a look in his eyes that you couldn't recognize.
'Congratulations.' He muttered stiffly.
You look at him in surprise.
'Is everything okay?' you ask, looking between the two curiously.
'No.' Adam snaps, turning on his heel and marching out of the garage.
You, Ryan and Aaron all look at each other.
'Is there something I should know?' You ask.
'No.' They both answer, a little too quickly for your liking.
You made your way into the garage one Saturday morning, the newspaper under one arm, Aaron's breakfast in the other hand. You pulled open the door down to Cains tiny, little office when something caught your eye. The door to the other part of the garage was open. You slipped down the hall and peeped your head around the door to see Adam and Aaron standing in the middle of the room, glaring at each other.
'That's not fair mate! You promised!' Adam snapped, an angry look in his eyes.
Aaron shook his head and folded his arms across his chest.
'I don't know what you want me to say Adam. I can't give you everything you want!' he insisted.
Adam snorted.
'Oh, but you can give it all to your precious Jackson! Tell me, what happens in five years from now and you realize that you've made a mistake?' he demanded.
'I'm used to sacrifice.'
'So am I mate!' he hissed bitterly.
Aaron shrugged and looked down at the ground.
'I want to be with you, you know that as well as I do, but he can give me a normal relationship. You can't.' he explained.
Adam sighed heavily and rolled his eyes.
'Yes I can. I'll tell me parents. We can get married. We can buy a house together, we can do all the things you can do with him.' He argued.
Aaron shook his head again and looked at Adam pitifully.
'But what about Holly? And everyone here in Emmerdale? They'll stare…' He whispered.
'Let them.'
Aaron shook his head and took a step back.
'Adam… we couldn't.'
'Yes! We could!'
Aaron nodded uncomfortably and offered Adam a lopsided grin.
'But what if it doesn't work out? As awful as this sounds, I could lose Jackson, I couldn't ever lose you.'
You walk away, tears in your eyes. You'd heard more than enough.
You had always liked men.
But Aaron made you hate them.
