NO CHALLENGE
** NOTICE! SEVERAL PEOPLE HAVE TRIED TO TELL ME THAT THIS IS A RIP-OFF OF THE OTHER FIC WRITTEN ON THE SAME SUBJECT KNOWN AS 'The Unworthy Challenger.' FOR THOSE WHO WILL REVIEW, REALIZE THAT 'The Unworthy Challenger' WAS POSTED A DAY BEFORE THE ORIGINAL VERSION OF THIS ONE. THX. AND FOR THOSE WHO REVIEWED LIKE THIS WAS A RIP-OFF, YOU PEOPLE ARE SUCH DUMB-ASSES. **
** First off, each next paragraph is a different person (their are only two people in this one) and it's two friends arguing about who'll win the next fight. Also, the opinions in the below rap are not necessarily meant to be taken literally and are, in fact, fictional (to me, anyway). **
I bet I beat your ass easy today
you just got no skills in Smash Bros. Melee
but this time, which character to play?
Who should I beat your ass with, whadya say?
I don't know who your gonna use
but I already know who I'm gonna choose
Cuz with Link I'm about to make you pay your dues
with a forward A Smash I give you a slash
and a bash with a bomb and you walk away gashed
your 'tude'll be dashed, and who ever you picked thrashed
you'll be trashed and I'll rack another victory to my stash.
Stupid fool
Link is nothin' but a tool
even if you think he's cool
he's nothin' in a duel
I'll school you a rule
and charge you face first like a bull.
Dude, that's just crazy
your skills are gettin' hazy
I know you'll be using Peach
lookin' like Daisy.
Why would I continue to use that ho?
She has no decent moves, you know?
You think you've got the skills to show
but your moves have gotta go
and your strategy, it really blows
you'll never bust my fighting flow
with blow after blow I'll hoe you to the ground
and beat you faster than the speed of sound
don't mess with these rounds of ground bustin' bounds
because a victory here, you've never first found.
So, you think the king you're crowned?
I'm going to beat your ass in the first round
I'll grab you with Mario and swing your ass around.
You can't joke this through
Mewtwo will kill you.
Don't think that you can kick my ass
I'll finish you off with one quick Skull Bash
your foolish stunts will never pass
forget it, against me you'll never last.
Mario's too much of a fatty to fight
Psychic type will beat him down with all their might
it's quite a sight to see with this two eyed fright
and believe it, no bark can be worse than Mewtwo's bite.
You think that'll help win this fight
Captain Falcon will punch him dead with all of his might
with a Falcon Punch you'll not last the night
and the sight of that fright will be your last sigh.
Not another breath the Mewtwo will breath
if you think you'll win with that, just leave
because you're skills are beneath me
just try it and see, a winner this time, you'll never be.
We'll just have to see
but Falco's Forward Smash B
will knock Captain Falcon falling into the sea
So get offa me, you'll lose, clearly.
To hell with that, G
I'll bust out Shiek
and bash Falco's beak,
put an end to that freak,
you need to know, I'm at my peak
I'm flawless, there is no leak
is it truly a win you seek?
You're future is startin' to look bleak
but beatin' your ass, what a treat
I'll land right on toppa ur head with my feet
while I'm upside down in the air, what a feat
and then your humiliation'll be complete
when soon then, you and your maker will meet
you thinkin' your fighting style is neat
but you'll be stuck six feat under the peat.
Wait until I show you Bowsa
it's gonna wow ya.
With spikes on his back
more painful than thumbtacks
I'll pack your rack to the Mute City race track.
Breathin' fire with all my power
Just call me sire, you damn coward.
Your style's goin' sour, you got no cream
and get your ass beat down when I let off steam
even slow moves can beat your ass, it seems
you couldn't beat me right now, not even in your dreams.
Bowser's way too big even for his power
he could be too easily beat with an Unown shower
he'd even get stuck in a Hyrule Castle tower
and how dare you call me a damn coward!?
Now I see how it is
now you're gettin' me pissed
how many ways I could beat you I'd list
but I'd rather do the talking with my fist!
Ha, you gotta feel dissed
cuz all your attacks missed
I'll cut your fist right offa yo wrist.
Let's slam your ass with Luigi's Green Missile
you gettin' stuck in a pickle, oh shit, sit still.
Tell me how much pain you feel
while you watch the PokŠball peel
but what else got you stuck?
Is it that flipper wheel?
Why you gotta take my style and steal?
Is that all you got, to earn a meal?
Your moves are mild
while my style is wild.
When it comes down to the end
I know who is my friend
I'll pick Marth and then
it's time to beat your tail end.
Marth is a damn toy
compared to Roy boy
you can't catch me with this ploy
quit playin' coy
you actin' gay
this shit can't stay
the same every day
you haven't got skill to play
like a bad-ass in Smash Bros. Melee
though fight you may
you won't last the day.
Roy's air moves are gay as hell
you won't get the priviledge of jail
you going to end up straight in hell
punch your carcass down, you fell
will you survive? Only the fire will tell
Come back at me with that? It just won't sell
Dr. Mario'll put you in the hospital
Calm down dude, you need to chill
take another Megavitamin pill
don't feel any better? What's the deal?
Maybe that's how you're supposed to feel
after takin' a bash to your green hat bill
this is the type of clash that's meant to kill!
In terms of skill
your at the bottom of the hill
I'll kill you with an iron will.
Confident enough to use Jigglypuff
normal humiliation just isn't enough
you'll be beaten by this ball of fluff
when it comes to fightin' you don't got the stuff
even TRYING to win like that is rough
and to beat me, you'll need to be more tough.
I'll beat that bitch with a crazy laze
and this low skill gimmick's just a phase
so watch me let loose with a Ganondorf blaze
a Warlock Punch will leave you dazed
and you'll be feeling this hit for days.
Won't even leave you standing, I don't need to complain
the thought that you challenge me is totally insane
you can just watch your hopes slip down the drain
this cocky attitude just can't be maintained
and every move you do is utterly in vain
every item you throw I dodge and sustain
and let me get near and I'll raise cain
your insults make me mad I've gotta refrain
from gettin' to angry to play this game
your style with everyone is just the same
remember when I told you Jigglypuff was lame?
Your mockings are simple and plain
you need to remember to remain sane
in terms of skill, I'm on the next plain
with muscles so strong, you see my neck vein
so do you see my skill? Ya what's my name?
Send you to your death in a ball of flame
in Snapshot mode you get beat every frame
in every picture I've got taken from the game
so I'll beat you with this fine lookin' dame
and let Zelda get you screaming in pain
bowl your round ass down the 13th lane
for bad luck to get you down and rattle your brain
notice how your powers are tame
and see how my moves got me fame
don't challenge me, I put you to shame
I even won after your homies came
remember, the result remains the same
do another bullshit move, you call that game?
Yoshi will make your chances slim
even though your future is grim
you see me crack a grin, such a sin
I could be drunk off my ass since din'
since I got addicted to the red gin
still beat you back into the bin
I smack you up like Eminem does Kim
remember when you came first to the den?
I've beaten you every time since then
think you can change it since way back when
but I guess that's the way it's been
you're shit's corny you layin' eggs like a hen
you have no skills and you try to hang with real men.
** To be continued and/or editted. **
** NOTICE! SEVERAL PEOPLE HAVE TRIED TO TELL ME THAT THIS IS A RIP-OFF OF THE OTHER FIC WRITTEN ON THE SAME SUBJECT KNOWN AS 'The Unworthy Challenger.' FOR THOSE WHO WILL REVIEW, REALIZE THAT 'The Unworthy Challenger' WAS POSTED A DAY BEFORE THE ORIGINAL VERSION OF THIS ONE. THX. AND FOR THOSE WHO REVIEWED LIKE THIS WAS A RIP-OFF, YOU PEOPLE ARE SUCH DUMB-ASSES. **
** First off, each next paragraph is a different person (their are only two people in this one) and it's two friends arguing about who'll win the next fight. Also, the opinions in the below rap are not necessarily meant to be taken literally and are, in fact, fictional (to me, anyway). **
I bet I beat your ass easy today
you just got no skills in Smash Bros. Melee
but this time, which character to play?
Who should I beat your ass with, whadya say?
I don't know who your gonna use
but I already know who I'm gonna choose
Cuz with Link I'm about to make you pay your dues
with a forward A Smash I give you a slash
and a bash with a bomb and you walk away gashed
your 'tude'll be dashed, and who ever you picked thrashed
you'll be trashed and I'll rack another victory to my stash.
Stupid fool
Link is nothin' but a tool
even if you think he's cool
he's nothin' in a duel
I'll school you a rule
and charge you face first like a bull.
Dude, that's just crazy
your skills are gettin' hazy
I know you'll be using Peach
lookin' like Daisy.
Why would I continue to use that ho?
She has no decent moves, you know?
You think you've got the skills to show
but your moves have gotta go
and your strategy, it really blows
you'll never bust my fighting flow
with blow after blow I'll hoe you to the ground
and beat you faster than the speed of sound
don't mess with these rounds of ground bustin' bounds
because a victory here, you've never first found.
So, you think the king you're crowned?
I'm going to beat your ass in the first round
I'll grab you with Mario and swing your ass around.
You can't joke this through
Mewtwo will kill you.
Don't think that you can kick my ass
I'll finish you off with one quick Skull Bash
your foolish stunts will never pass
forget it, against me you'll never last.
Mario's too much of a fatty to fight
Psychic type will beat him down with all their might
it's quite a sight to see with this two eyed fright
and believe it, no bark can be worse than Mewtwo's bite.
You think that'll help win this fight
Captain Falcon will punch him dead with all of his might
with a Falcon Punch you'll not last the night
and the sight of that fright will be your last sigh.
Not another breath the Mewtwo will breath
if you think you'll win with that, just leave
because you're skills are beneath me
just try it and see, a winner this time, you'll never be.
We'll just have to see
but Falco's Forward Smash B
will knock Captain Falcon falling into the sea
So get offa me, you'll lose, clearly.
To hell with that, G
I'll bust out Shiek
and bash Falco's beak,
put an end to that freak,
you need to know, I'm at my peak
I'm flawless, there is no leak
is it truly a win you seek?
You're future is startin' to look bleak
but beatin' your ass, what a treat
I'll land right on toppa ur head with my feet
while I'm upside down in the air, what a feat
and then your humiliation'll be complete
when soon then, you and your maker will meet
you thinkin' your fighting style is neat
but you'll be stuck six feat under the peat.
Wait until I show you Bowsa
it's gonna wow ya.
With spikes on his back
more painful than thumbtacks
I'll pack your rack to the Mute City race track.
Breathin' fire with all my power
Just call me sire, you damn coward.
Your style's goin' sour, you got no cream
and get your ass beat down when I let off steam
even slow moves can beat your ass, it seems
you couldn't beat me right now, not even in your dreams.
Bowser's way too big even for his power
he could be too easily beat with an Unown shower
he'd even get stuck in a Hyrule Castle tower
and how dare you call me a damn coward!?
Now I see how it is
now you're gettin' me pissed
how many ways I could beat you I'd list
but I'd rather do the talking with my fist!
Ha, you gotta feel dissed
cuz all your attacks missed
I'll cut your fist right offa yo wrist.
Let's slam your ass with Luigi's Green Missile
you gettin' stuck in a pickle, oh shit, sit still.
Tell me how much pain you feel
while you watch the PokŠball peel
but what else got you stuck?
Is it that flipper wheel?
Why you gotta take my style and steal?
Is that all you got, to earn a meal?
Your moves are mild
while my style is wild.
When it comes down to the end
I know who is my friend
I'll pick Marth and then
it's time to beat your tail end.
Marth is a damn toy
compared to Roy boy
you can't catch me with this ploy
quit playin' coy
you actin' gay
this shit can't stay
the same every day
you haven't got skill to play
like a bad-ass in Smash Bros. Melee
though fight you may
you won't last the day.
Roy's air moves are gay as hell
you won't get the priviledge of jail
you going to end up straight in hell
punch your carcass down, you fell
will you survive? Only the fire will tell
Come back at me with that? It just won't sell
Dr. Mario'll put you in the hospital
Calm down dude, you need to chill
take another Megavitamin pill
don't feel any better? What's the deal?
Maybe that's how you're supposed to feel
after takin' a bash to your green hat bill
this is the type of clash that's meant to kill!
In terms of skill
your at the bottom of the hill
I'll kill you with an iron will.
Confident enough to use Jigglypuff
normal humiliation just isn't enough
you'll be beaten by this ball of fluff
when it comes to fightin' you don't got the stuff
even TRYING to win like that is rough
and to beat me, you'll need to be more tough.
I'll beat that bitch with a crazy laze
and this low skill gimmick's just a phase
so watch me let loose with a Ganondorf blaze
a Warlock Punch will leave you dazed
and you'll be feeling this hit for days.
Won't even leave you standing, I don't need to complain
the thought that you challenge me is totally insane
you can just watch your hopes slip down the drain
this cocky attitude just can't be maintained
and every move you do is utterly in vain
every item you throw I dodge and sustain
and let me get near and I'll raise cain
your insults make me mad I've gotta refrain
from gettin' to angry to play this game
your style with everyone is just the same
remember when I told you Jigglypuff was lame?
Your mockings are simple and plain
you need to remember to remain sane
in terms of skill, I'm on the next plain
with muscles so strong, you see my neck vein
so do you see my skill? Ya what's my name?
Send you to your death in a ball of flame
in Snapshot mode you get beat every frame
in every picture I've got taken from the game
so I'll beat you with this fine lookin' dame
and let Zelda get you screaming in pain
bowl your round ass down the 13th lane
for bad luck to get you down and rattle your brain
notice how your powers are tame
and see how my moves got me fame
don't challenge me, I put you to shame
I even won after your homies came
remember, the result remains the same
do another bullshit move, you call that game?
Yoshi will make your chances slim
even though your future is grim
you see me crack a grin, such a sin
I could be drunk off my ass since din'
since I got addicted to the red gin
still beat you back into the bin
I smack you up like Eminem does Kim
remember when you came first to the den?
I've beaten you every time since then
think you can change it since way back when
but I guess that's the way it's been
you're shit's corny you layin' eggs like a hen
you have no skills and you try to hang with real men.
** To be continued and/or editted. **
