A/N Ok, so this was supposed to be a quick oneshot but hahaha! (Sarcastic laughing) It didn't turn out that way. Yes, I was recently at the spa and like the homestuck dork I am I thought 'how would Karkat react to being here?' So, viola! Here's my answer.

There are lots of pairings and some of the characters are a little OOC. I can't do Dave. He's so hard guys, I know other people can but I can't! :(

The perspective constantly changes and I thought about putting in the 'be Karkat' 'be John' thing but with the way I write that wouldn't have worked. Oh and I know some parts are slow, I apologize in advance [humbly bows towards readers]. So, to whoever has read this ridiculously long authors note, thanks for reading! I hope you like it! :D

X~x~X

"NO"

"Oh, come ON!" John pouted, pulling at Karkats arms that were securely crossed, who just growled in response. He was trying to pull Karkat towards the warm, inviting hot tub. They were in a small secluded room that was misty from the heat of the warm water. It ran the length of the wall, ending with a peaceful waterfall that ran into it. Along the dark rooms floors were pebbled tiles that led to the dry and hot sauna, then into the next hallway.

A year after the game the humans and trolls settled on a new planet in the universe they had created, one that closely resembled earth. After Jane had reached the full extent of her maid of life aspect she revived the dead trolls. This couldn't have been done without Gamzees 'help' keeping the bodies preserved. Now all of the humans and trolls lived on the same planet, with the exception of Aradia and Sollux. Aradia felt like she found her place helping the dead, and Sollux wanted to be with Aradia, his matesprit.

When they began exploring the planet they discovered that it was extremely similar to earth, with restaurants, parks, buildings, and spas. It was Jades idea that the group go to a spa, after the game they all deserved to relax. None of the trolls knew what it was but all had agreed to go, except Nepeta, who didn't like being around water and Equius, who thought it would be too 'lewd' to go to a place where people wore bathing suits. The four alpha kids all stayed behind as well, for various reasons. That left everyone else, still a large group.

As soon as they got there they split off into groups, Karkat sticking around John. The same John who was currently trying to drag the small troll to the hot tub.

"AUGH! Why won't you just go in?!" John threw his hands up in the air to show his exasperation. Karkat glared acidly up at the slightly taller human. He enunciated clearly to get his point across.

"I. Don't. Like. Water. How many FUCKING times do I need to explain this to you?!" His throat erupted into a growl after the last statement. John rolled his eyes, now used to Karkats growling and snarls. He knew he would never act on it. Then he mustered up all his energy into his pout and widened his eyes looking sheepishly at Karkat.

"Please? Just this once?" As soon as Karkat realized what John was doing he tried to look away, but it was already too late. Those bright blue eyes caught him again and Karkat felt his shield breaking. Why does he have to be so fucking cute? He sighed heavily, knowing he couldn't resist John's puppy dog eyes.

"Fine. But just this once. I fucking hate it when you do that to me." John just smiled gleefully, pulling Karkat towards the hot tub. John stepped down into the stairs hesitating as his body adjusted to the heat. He finally got in all the way and sighed in relief as the hot water swirled around him, relaxing all of his tense muscles. He looked up at Karkat who was still making his way down the stairs, face grimacing.

"This is so fucking hot, how do you stand it?" John giggled, fully relaxed.

"You get used to it" Karkat slid into the water and sat next to John, leaning his head back on the side and closing his eyes. John watched as Karkat visibly relaxed and smiled, he hardly ever got to see Karkat like this. With Karkats eyes closed John looked at him. At his glistening wet gray skin, his soft eyelashes closed over what he knew as brilliant amber eyes. His gaze wandered under the water, to Karkats bare gray chest adorned with fit abs. Suddenly John realized what he was doing and looked away blushing profusely. He was checking Karkat out! Karkat glanced over at him confused by the sudden movement. John was looking away, his cheeks a burning red.

"John? Are you ok?"

"What? Oh, y...yeah." Karkat raised an eyebrow at his stuttering and was about to question more when Gamzee and Tavros sauntered over.

"Hey motherfucking best friends. Mind if ya get your share on with this hot ablution trap?" Gamzee smiled whimsically at them.

"Of course! Plenty of room to share!" John chirped out happily, grateful for the distraction. Gamzees smile grew wider, a response thought impossible. He turned behind him to the smaller troll.

"Come on Tavbro" with that he quickly swooped to pick up Tavros bridal style and began descending the stairs into the hot tub. Tavros was blushing a chocolate brown and stuttered.

"Gamzee! I, uh, can walk on my own now." He indeed could. When Jane revived him Equius made another pair of robo legs for him.

[Now, you might be thinking to yourself 'robo legs?! He'll get electrocuted!' ah ha, yes. However Alternian technology is much more advanced than human, and since their royalty lives underwater all of the electronics are water proof. Now after that little tidbit, back to the story. ]

"oh yeah, I motherfuckin got my forget on. I up and like it better this way anyway." He smiled warmly down at Tavros, who blushed a deeper brown and was silent as Gamzee brought them deeper into the hot tub. They settled at a corner of the hot tub and began their own quiet conversation, whispering sweet nothings into each other's ears, both blushing and smiling goofily at each other.

John watched them for a while, then began to feel uncomfortable, like he was invading their privacy. Karkat obviously didn't mind, as he went back to leaning against the side with his eyes closed.

"Um, Karkat?" Said troll opened one of his eyes to look at the nervous human.

"What"

"Do you want to go somewhere else?" Karkat could see the obvious discomfort that John had, and nodded. He slowly stood up in the hot tub and walked towards the stairs, with John close behind him. Gamzee and Tavros didn't even realize that they left. When they were out Karkat stretched his arms over his head, rippling his red tinted gray skin from the warmth.

"Where to now?" He asked John. The human pursed his lips looking around in the dark misty room, his eyes falling upon the closest door, the wet sauna.

"How bout in there?" Gesturing toward the door. Karkat just shrugged and made his way over.

"Um, Karkat?" The troll threw a glance over his shoulder.

"What, Egbert?" John looked down at his feet, unsure how to word his question.

"Um, well, is what Tavros and Gamzee are doing… normal?" Karkat stopped and turned to John, looking at the taller with confusion.

"You mean their matespritship? Yes, it is a normal relationship by Alternian standards." John ground his feet, pursing his lips at Karkats misunderstanding.

"No, I mean, it's great that they're in love and all that, anyone can see that, but what I mean is… they're both guys" Karkat wanted to immediately yell at Johns stupidity, but restrained himself realizing this was a serious topic, a conversation that might affect his future. He thought of his next words carefully, an action unusual for Karkat.

"John, I thought we've been over this. Troll relationships are not based off of gender. Technically, we are all the same gender, except for the mother grub. They only differences in 'gender' is a slightly different physique"

"Oh, ok…" John continued to look at the ground, and Karkat knew the conversation was over. He turned back towards the wet sauna.

When he opened the door a hot mist pooled around his feet welcoming him in. John followed closely behind, and Karkat shut the door. They couldn't see a thing. It was a wall of white mist, yet they could hear voices then a harsh giggle erupt through the mist. Karkat felt John take his hand as he blindly put his arm out in front of him and walked forward.

"Uff!" John grunted as his shin ran into a bench.

"Found the bench" John said, smirking with pain. Karkat just rolled his eyes at the doofus, a gesture lost as John couldn't see him. As they both sat down the steam machine turned off, leaving a deathly silence throughout the room. From across the room a person giggled and whispered, then the machine whined on again.

"Ok, who the fuck turned that on again?! I can barely see my own fucking hand!" A gasp sounded behind them as a disturbed stranger made their way through the mist, slamming the door on the way out. John looked over at him disapprovingly.

"You can't just say things like that in public! It's very rude." Karkat was about to start arguing when a loud cackle sounded. A figure walked towards them through the mist, and a Cheshire grin welcomed them.

"Yeah, Karkles, why do you have to be so mean?" She slid next to Karkat, so Karkat was in the middle of John and her. His muscles tensed up in anger.

"You turned that fucking machine back on, didn't you? I can hardly breathe through the steam but it's all fun and fucking games to you isn't it?" Terezi leaned closer and smiled devilishly.

"Isn't everything?"

"Someone needs to work on their temper" Dave appeared through the mist, walking to take a seat next to John. John grinned happily at seeing his best friend.

"Dave! Are you enjoying your time at the spa?" Dave grinned mysteriously.

"As a matter of fact, I am" He gave one of his rare real smiles, and John froze, staring at him. Dave didn't have his shades on, which was unusual but not surprising considering the steam. That wasn't why John suddenly grew quiet. Speckled across Dave's neck were small bruises, with the occasional fang mark. A smile awkwardly tugged at Johns lips as his face went red.

"I can see why" Throughout their whole conversation Karkat was arguing with Terezi who was just giggling in response. Karkat broke into a full on yell and John stood up. He took Karkats hand who immediately shut up to look at him questioningly.

"Come on, let's go"

"Uh, ok?" Karkat was obviously confused but let John led him through the steam towards the door.

"Bye Dave! Terezi!" John called behind him, trying to mask his embarrassment.

"Later, John" As John opened the door he was surprised to see Vriska, who immediately snarled at him.

"Outta my way" She roughly pushed past John and Karkat making her way through the door into the steamy mist. John sighed at her reaction. It had been three weeks since he rejected her confession, and she was not taking it well. He had hoped that they would remain friends, but obviously that wasn't going to happen any time soon. When he thought about it, he didn't know why he rejected her. She was the girl of his dreams. Strong, confident, beautiful, everything he wanted. But, something held him back. A part of him that said she wasn't right for him. Someone else was.

"So, where are we going? Or did you and your stupid thinkpan not think of that yet?" Karkat grumbled, crossing his arms. John shook his previous thoughts from his mind.

"Why don't we just walk around for a bit!" He grinned his usual dorky smile and started to walk through the hallway. They momentarily paused by the dry sauna door, and John peeked in. Feferi and Jade were laying on their stomachs facing eachother, talking up a storm. They were both very cheerful and expressive, complimenting each other well.

"Do you want to go in there? We could chat with them!" John reached for the door but Karkat stopped him. He gave John a grimace.

"No, it looks like they're getting into a pretty deep moirallegiance and we shouldn't disturb them" John retracted his hand, but bit his lip and looked at Karkat thoughtfully.

"Isn't that the quadrant with friendship? Like, better than best friends?" His eyes suddenly lit up.

"Superfriends?!" John had an overly enthusiastic grin and Karkat facepalmed.

"No, stupid Egbert! They're moirails; you can't relate a fucking human term to it!" Karkat sighed.

"Besides, I know Feferi really needs this. Ever since her old moirail, Sollux, left she's been really depressed." Johns grin fell.

"Oh. Well, should we continue?" Karkat nodded and led the way. As they were walking through the hallway they passed the manicure tables, where Rose and Kanaya were. As they breezed by John noticed the manicurist was looking at Kanayas claws with deep bewilderment.

Nothing interested either one yet, so they continued walking down the long hallway till they had to turn down another. This was where the massages were given, and as they passed one room Karkat recognized the wavy accent coming from one. He paused, and John ran into his back not noticing he had stopped.

"Karkat…?" The troll just shooshed him as he eavesdropped.

"This is soo relaxing. I feel like I could tell you anything. Do you know you're the most beautiful person I've met?" The sea dweller continued on, ignoring the masseuses hushes and 'please relax' code for 'shut up'.

"After this, do you want to go grab a cup of coffee? Or we could go back to my place, you have seen every part of me after all" John and Karkat looked at each other sharing a 'my Gog he's serious' look. A hushed nervous voice responded.

"No thank you… and you didn't have to strip to the nude. You really… didn't have to…"

They continued down the hallway, snickering to themselves at Eridans lack of shame. They came to a stop at a dead end. Karkats anger spiked.

"Did we fucking come all this way to nowhere?! You had no idea where we were going did you?!" John pouted.

"It's my first time here too, jeez." John looked to the side, debating.

"Uh, Karkat… since there's no one around… can I talk to you about something?" Karkat tilted his head.

"Fuck Egbert, what do you want to know now?" Karkat was tired of John's consistent questions about trolls and such, even though it secretly pleased him that John was curious about his culture.

"Well, um, how do I phrase this….?" Karkat rolled his eyes.

"Just spit it out!" John grimaced, scratching the back of his neck. He then proceeded to ramble, his pace quickening with his nervousness.

"Well, I was just thinking that we spend a lot of time together. I mean A LOT. More than friends do. And I know the whole quadrant thing is different so I began to think maybe you put me in one of your quadrants, subconsciously, you know? I thought it would have to be the moirail thing but after I've seen how the others act around each other in their relationships, well, you don't act like a moirail. You… you act like a matesprite. I mean you always listen to me, sure, but then you give me these looks. I know you try to hide them but they're really obvious. I didn't think anything would ever work like that. But Rose and Dave are dating trolls. And then I also thought that I couldn't, because I'm not a homosexual. But…but now I don't know. I've… caught myself doing it. Giving you those looks, the same you give to me. And, I mean my whole civilization is gone. I don't think it matters anymore, but I feel like I've just realized that. I mean it's weird, it's really really weird, but I feel like I'm ready to at least give it a shot. I want to give it a shot."

Throughout the whole rant Karkat was staring at John, unbelieving. Was this a dream? Was he imagining this? Ever since John came Karkat wanted a flushed relationship with him, but since John 'wasn't a homosexual' he tried to suppress those thoughts. But now, here John is, admitting that he felt the same way!

John was beet red. Karkat hadn't said a word. His face was unreadable, as smooth as a summer pond.

"Wait, that's what you wanted, right? Oh God, I hadn't even thought if you didn't feel that way! Was I wrong? I just assumed, if you don't then…" he was harshly cut off by the feeling of Karkats lips crashing to meet his own. The troll reached up and placed his hands on the side of Johns head, steadying the nervous human. A low purr rumbled from the depth of his throat. He broke the kiss and smiled into John's mouth. As he whispered John could feel the fluttering of his lips upon his own.

"Shut the fuck up, shit face, you talk too much" Karkat then hungrily kissed John again. This time John responded, relaxing and putting his own hands around Karkats waist, enjoying the moment. They broke again and just looked into the others eyes, holding each other.

"This feels right" John whispered, and Karkat leaned up for another kiss. This time John stopped him, and Karkat looked hurt. John just chuckled.

"Sorry, it's just weird, being in the middle of the hallway… where anyone can pop by…" Karkat sighed, releasing himself from Johns grip yet taking his hand in the process. As they walked down the hallway, Karkat started opening doors and peeking in.

"Karkat! What are you doing! You can't just peep like that!"

"You wanted privacy, this is the best…" He opened a door and a distinct giggle stopped him. In one of the massage rooms Vriska was sitting on a massage table, her hips straddling a giggling Terezi, clad in only her bright red underwear. Vriska had her hand on her check as if just breaking a kiss, and she swung her head towards the door.

"Get out!" she snarled. Karkat quickly shut the door, a burst of obnoxious giggling sounding through the door.

"Man, I knew they were each others kismesis, but that escalated fucking quickly" John just stood wide eyed, processing the information. Karkat pulled John along, who complied without really realizing.

"Oh! Hey man!" Dave ran up to them with an uncharacteristic distressed look on his face.

"Have you guys seen Terezi at all? She just sort a left. I thought she just got lost in the mist but, I can't find her." Karkat and John shared a look and turned towards Dave. Dave's eyes narrowed.

"No. she's with her again, isn't she?" Dave jogged past them, apparently their look the only thing he needed. They could hear him mumbling to himself.

"I thought Vriska was going to be a onetime black fling…" the two stood there, processing what just transpired. Then a grin slowly grew on Johns face.

"Guess what Karkat?"

"What?"

"The wet saunas empty" Karkat turned towards John with a mischievous grin. He pulled John into a quick kiss before leading his budding matesprit down the hall.

A/N Thanks for reading! Please review and tell me what you thought!