This is ...not crack, but perilously close to it. Okay, it actually is crack, but I like to think it's more like me having a ridiculously good time writing silliness. It's a birthday mathom, and in the hobbit-like fashion I offer it, I hope you enjoy. I am far from one hundred and eleventy. Maybe someday...

When You Wish Upon a Star


"There! See? It's a falling star. Make a wish!"

"It's falling quite slowly. Are you sure-"

"Quickly! It's almost out of sight!"

"All right, all right..."

"Did you-"

"Yes, Pippin. I did!"

"So did I." The crickets filled the night air with song, accompanied by the lower bass of frogs in a nearby pond. "Merry? Do you think it heard us?"

"I don't know, Pip. I reckon...maybe?"

"I hope so." The voices grew quiet as the pair continued up the path, towards the Last Homely House. "Frodo is going to need all the luck he can get."

For a long moment there was only the song of the pond inhabitants and the constant murmuring of the waterfalls. Then a disbelieving voice asked, "Were they wishing on Eärendil?"

Glorfindel, leaning against the railing of the bridge that crossed the pond, smiled as he turned to look at the elf joining him. "I believe so." He laughed at the look of consternation on Lindir's face.

"They do realize it is a ship captained by Master Elrond's father."

"I think not, but let's not ruin the illusion for them, hmm?" Straightening, Glorfindel looked to see where the pair of hobbits were ascending a staircase that led to the Hall of Fire. "They're not wrong. Frodo is going to need all the fortune he can get."

"But...Eärendil cannot possibly have heard them!"

The smile grew enigmatic. "Do you think not?" Looking up to where the star, now barely visible in the inky night sky, sailed majestically onward, Glorfindel shrugged. "Even the Wise cannot see all ends."

Lindir snorted and pushed away from the railing. "You truly don't know what to say, do you?"

"I truly don't know if Eärendil hears anything from here, that is true." Glorfindel chuckled. "But then again, I've never sailed on Vingilótë. Have you?"

"This is absurd!" Lindir rolled his eyes and left Glorfindel, still smiling, at the foot of the bridge.

"Yes, but a little absurdity is good for the soul." He looked up and winked at the speck of a star, disappearing into the void of night. "A little boy once told me that." Humming a song, Glorfindel strolled along the walkway, heading for the Hall of Fire and a lovely night of singing and tale-telling.


"My lord!" A harried looking elf ran up to the tall figure standing at the prow of the ship, a blazing gem bound upon his brow. He winced as the man turned to face him and held out the paper in his hand. "This just came in!"

"Ah, from the little people visiting my son." Eärendil took the papers and read them, a smile creasing his face. "I shall pass these on to Lord Manwë. Thank you, Saeldur." Seeing the poor elf's eyes were watering, he added, "Wear your eye protection. We don't want another lecture from Lady Estë about eye safety and Silmarils, do we?"

Raising an arm to shield his eyes, Saeldur offered a wan smile. "No, my lord. Definitely not."

As he was once again left alone on the prow, Eärendil looked at the note and smiled softly. "Help for Frodo, eh?" He nodded. "Aye. I think I have just the idea."


"Special Delivery for Lady Galadriel!" A weary looking elf, eye shades slightly askew, stumbled up the last bit of the talan staircase and leaned against a wall, panting for a moment. He was used to tossing and pitching boards, the crack of a sail when the solar wind caught at it, and the wide expanse of space. Land lubbing it was for his woods-loving cousins.

"Over here." Haldir gestured him forward, halting him to look him up and down. "Why do you shield your eyes?"

"It's bloody bright here after sailing the skies, friend!" Peering over the top of the wooden eye shades, he winced and shoved them back up. "I've been warned your lady glows near as bright as what I've brought."

"She is..." Haldir paused for drama, his chin lifting as he smiled besottedly. "The Lady of Light."

"Right." A shrug and the elf, looked around. "Is your light lady around? I do have a Special Delivery. Time sensitive."

"You can leave it with me-"

"No, no." He shook his head, dark hair lightened by constant exposure to a Very Bright Gem sliding over his shoulders. "This goes in your lady's hands and no others. I have express orders from my lord."

Looking entirely unimpressed, Haldir drawled, "And whom might that be?"

"Haldir." The voice seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere.

"Glory be," the elf in the eye shades breathed. "You are lit up like a -"

"The Lady Galadriel," Haldir cut him off quickly. "Lady of Light, White Lady of -"

"Yes, that will do, Haldir." Galadriel nodded, ignoring the crestfallen look on her march warden's face. "Thank you."

It was a clear dismissal, but Haldir gave the messenger a Look as he passed to leave, stomping a bit harder than necessary down the long staircase.

"He's very loyal."

"Yes." Galadriel smiled and studied the messenger. "You've come from very far away."

"Oh, yes, my lady, but-"

"I see a light..." Galadriel sighed. "Do take off those ridiculous eye shades."

"It's a bit bright." But he did as bid and shrugged as she winced. "Our eyes do change, my lady, due to the..." He looked around, as if expecting to see a Fëanorian lurking on the stairs behind him. Lowering his voice, he nodded conspiratorially. "The Gem."

Indeed, the messenger appeared to have tree-bright eyes, though from his Falathirm accent and his name, Galadriel supposed he had never laid eyes on the Two Trees. "Why make such a long journey?"

"Himself told me to put this in your hands only." Pulling a well-wrapped bundle from his cloak pocket, the messenger held it out to her. "Lady Galadriel, Lord Eärendil sends this to you as fulfillment of the Make A Wish Program, and bids you give it to a visitor who shall arrive in the not too distant future."

"Make A Wish Program?" Unwrapping the bundle, Galadriel eyes widened as she beheld the vial filled with brilliant luminescence. "The light of Eärendil."

Beaming, the messenger nodded then sobered. "The little hobbit will have need of it, my lady. That's why my lord bid me to tell you."

"I will do as bid." Galadriel met his gaze. "Tell your lord thank you." As the messenger bowed, she said, "Now tell me about this Make A Wish Program."


"The parcel is safely delivered, my lord!"

"Marvelous! Thank you, Saeldur, and do put your eye shades on."

"She was asking about the program."

"Was she." Eärendil laughed. "And what did you tell her?"

"The truth, my lord, of course!" He grinned. "She insisted you, we," he gestured to the ship, "Are not a star and thus the entire thing is ridiculous, but did thank you for the gift."

"It will be sorely needed," Eärendil agreed softly. "And perhaps it will give her a bit of hope as well." He nodded, staring out at the darkness. "She will be hard-pressed. Tested as never before."

"My lord?" Saeldur looked confused.

"Pay me no mind, Saeldur." Eärendil drew in a deep breath and took hold of a rope before leaping up on the starboard rail of the ship. "Unfurl the sails and let us see what mysteries the night offers us!"


After all, how did Galadriel get Eärendil's light? From her mirror, but this could have happened. ;) Thank you for reading!