How can I not love you?
How can I not love you?
Hey Guys, so I am thinking of publishing this on Fanfic but wanted some feedback first. Tell me what you think? I am open to suggestions, improvements and CONSTRUCTIVE critism.
How can I not love you?
It's Kurt's engagement party. His marrying Adam. He loves Adam. But then he hears a heart felt song that was not meant for his ears. Blaine always found learning easy. Blaine must learn how not love Kurt, so he can move on. Truth be told that's rather a more difficult thing to learn.
Kurt was happy. He was getting married to Adam. He and Adam had arranged the engagement party. They'd invited all their friends and it was a night of great celebration. Kurt was hurriedly running around, being a good host to all his guests when his eyes caught site of Blaine, arm in arm with Sebastian. Kurt still didn't trust Sebastian, but when Blaine asked is he could bring someone, Kurt hadn't the heart to turn him down, happy to see Blaine had moved on. Blaine was smiling genuinely while talking to his old friends from New Directions, and smiling at Sebastian. What Kurt hadn't realised was that Blaine had become a master at masking his emotions and the only person who truly knew him was Sebastian. Sebastian could see through Blaine's mask, and his arm tightened protectively round Blaine. He was here with Blaine, as his date but Sebastian knew they weren't forever and he'd accepted it. Kurt's eyes met Adam's from across the room and he smiled in greeting, before beckoning him over. Kurt made his way towards the New Directions
"Hey Guys. Thank you so much for coming" Kurt said smiling at everyone
"Oh please like we'd miss the Hummel engagement party of the century!" Mercedes said smiling.
"I know. It's great" Adam said coming up behind Kurt and snaking his arm around Kurt's waist.
"Sorry guy's I will be back" Kurt said with a small smile as he and Adam went to greet everyone else. Blaine also turned to Sebastian
"I'm just going to use the rest room" He said and excused himself failing to hear the start of a Santana's next line
"Only difference to what I expected Hummel would do for a party was change the groom" Santana said sadly and looked at Sebastian who met her gaze straight on and nodded his head once to agree with her
"But his happy? That's all that matters right?" Quinn said quietly
"He is." Tina agreed sadly watching Blaine's retreating form her heart breaking for her friend.
Kurt and Adam had been mingling, chatting to people before Kurt had to excuse himself to use the rest room. As he walked out, he walked past a small room and saw a lone figure sitting at the piano. He was about to go in to see if he was alright when he started playing and Kurt stopped to listen, forgetting how beautiful his voice sounded
Cannot touch, cannot hold
Cannot be together
Cannot love, cannot kiss,
Cannot have each other
Blaine took a breath and continued on, his voice still soft and gently with the melody of the piano. Kurt continued to watch, smiling softly as the familiar voice
Must be strong, and we must let go
Cannot say what our hearts must know
How can I not love you?
What do I tell my heart?
Kurt saw Blaine shiver slightly but he didn't falter and continued his voice still soft and gentle, full of yearning and hope
When do I not want you here in my arms?
How does one waltz away from all of the memories?
How do I not miss you when you are gone?
Kurt watched his from behind and saw the slight shudder of shoulders and the tremble in his voice. It broke his heart to hear such pain, coming from the man he loves, no wait loved?
Cannot dream, Cannot share,
Sweet and tender moments
Cannot feel how we feel,
Must pretend it's over
A part of Blaine had always hoped Kurt would find his way back to him. Find his way back into his arms. Forgive everything he'd done and love him again. He knew a part of Kurt still loved him. He wasn't blind to the looks he'd got when he'd arrived or the brief way Kurt eyes would linger over him a second longer than everyone else.
Must be brave, and we must go on
Must not say what we've known all along
How can I not love you?
What do I tell my heart?
When do I not want you here in my arms?
How does one waltz away from all of the memories?
How do I not miss you when you are gone?
How can I not love you?
Kurt continued to watch Blaine sing. He still loved Blaine. A part of him still did, even though he'd denied it when Blaine asked a year ago. He'd known all along, but was so determined to move on and find a new path for his heart. He really did wonder what Blaine told his heart every night. Kurt knew he had Sebastian but even Kurt could see that Blaine never looked at Sebastian the way her had looked at Kurt. His eyes lingering for a second. Blaine had always had trouble letting go, he'd been the one desperate to get back together, to win Kurt back.
Must be brave, and we must be strong
Cannot say what we've known all along
How can I not love you?
What do I tell my heart?
When do I not want you here in my arms?
How does one waltz away from all of the memories?
How do I not miss you when you are gone?
Blaine sighed as he drew to the end of song. He must be brave and move on with someone, if not Sebastian then someone else. He can not tell Kurt he still loves him and make things awkward between himself and his best friend. His heart refused to listen to his head though, his heart couldn't accept they were over. How could he leave those memories of love and trust, of pain and sorrow, of quiet nights in and duets. He would always miss Kurt, part of him wished he didn't and had been able to move on like Kurt. Then his mind grew sad, how could Kurt not see, they were meant to be.
How can I not love you when you are gone?
Kurt watched in awe. Blaine's emotions were laid bare. His heart broke as he heard the quiet sobbing. He was in two minds whether to stay or go, when another figure appeared from behind, who walked straight up to Blaine and pulled him into his arms, holding the gentle man. As Kurt was about to leave them to it, and offer the comfort, he felt a pair of hands snake around his waist and a quiet voice whispered in his ear
"You still love him don't you?"
Song by Joy Enriquez How can I not love you?
Please Read and Review xx
