Present Tense
A/N: I had to write this because it's been interesting to me that Bryce & Nicole are on polar opposites with the whole Fate Date thing. He's living for his & she's sure she dies on hers, yet they've forged this deep bond. And from the moment Olivia reintroduced them the wistful looks each of them gives the other is just about maddening. I don't think Bryce is entirely clueless about the feelings he & Nicole share, I think he's in denial. Bryce is terminal (currently), Keiko's months off (probably) & Nicole's got a harsh date in the deep end (potentially), so I'm all about the present. I was inspired a lot by the song Say (All I Need) by OneRepublic. Just seems to fit Nyce & their whole Fate Date dilemma.
Disclaimer: I totally don't own FlashForward, I've simply free running plot bunnies inspired by some of the characters. This is just my toybox to have a little fun.
Chapter 1
Before the blackout, Nicole had looked forward to April 2010 as the end of her senior year of college. Her senior thesis would be complete and she'd have a few moments to breathe before graduation and obsess about her next step. She'd thought about possibly taking off a little time and then heading off to grad school along with a hundred other options. Every time she sat down to map out her next steps she foundered. She'd a notebook of seemingly endless possibilities that she was interested in pursuing to varying degrees. But when she looked through it, it didn't seem like the tines of a fork in a road. It was more like a box of spaghetti spilt on the floor. Pointing in different directions simultaneously from a center point, scattered and overlapping all at once. The only clear thing being, she was unsure of what she ultimately wanted to do with the rest of her life.
But after seeing her flash-forward, she wondered if the reason she'd been unable to figure out her next step was because she had no next step. There was no future to plan for. On April 29, 2010, she'd be dead. She wouldn't even make it to graduation. And while the realization that all her prior work would be for naught was mind-blowing, the dead part was what made her hide away for a few weeks. Paige had been relieved that she didn't have to come over for Mom-sitting and never asked Nicole why. Joel called her twice but she never returned his calls. She knew it was for the best. She'd been on a kind of impulsive binge the day of the flash. She couldn't think of what else she could call a spur of the moment hookup with the TA of her Ethics class. She hardly believed she'd invited him over to the Benfords while she was watching Charlie. She didn't even like him that much and she was pretty sure she wasn't his endgame either. It was reckless and stupid and she was determined not to do anything else in those two categories. So probably she was going to die, there was no point in courting more ways to find that end.
That end.
Even weeks later, the thought of her impending death stayed with her. With each day struck off the calendar, she knew she was one day closer. She'd thrown out all her calendars and found that for the most part, she didn't have to think about the days passing. Of course, the sun rose and set but in many ways it felt like replaying the day when she stuck to her routine. Even so, there were always exceptions that pulled her into the reality of the present and its rapid transition to becoming the past.
"Nicole, could you mark off the day?" one of the nurses at the station asked as she passed by.
Looking over her shoulder, she noticed she was closest to the calendar. She put the stack of patient files she held on the desk.
"Oh, sure." she replied, uncapping the nearest Sharpie and scoring a diagonal red line through the prior day's date.
This was the calendar that caught her sometimes. She started running through a quick calculation in her mind to ascertain how many days were left when her reverie was broken.
"There you are."
She smiled at the sound of Bryce's voice and turned to face him with an even brighter smile. That he'd been looking for her made the calendar thing sting less, even though he also was one of those exceptions. He was a major one actually.
"Here I am. Do you have something you need me to do?"
"Yeah, and it's really important."
He was smiling but sounded serious. She wondered again how he could make hospital scrubs look so good. Her latest theory was that it was probably the layered tee underneath thing.
"Sure, no problem. Let me just put these files away and I'll get right on it."
"Do those need to go to Records?"
"Yes."
"Bring them along. It's on the way."
Nicole grabbed her stack and the two of them walked down the corridor toward the elevator. She'd recently decided to temper her hopeful enthusiasm where Bryce was concerned. At least she'd resolved to try. But between his smile, extreme case of flash-forward induced romanticism and his ability to never tire of her company, she found herself on the losing end of another attempt.
The elevator was crowded. Nicole figured it was just as well two people were talking on their mobile phones as Bryce was busy reading some patient's paperwork and making notes, because she couldn't think of anything to say. He crashed shoulders with her playfully, still making notes. She crashed back. He did it again. She didn't take the bait and looked straight ahead, trying to ignore him. He did it again and she crashed back, unable to suppress a stream of giggles. Bryce's smile told her that was exactly the reaction he'd been going for as they continued to spar and parry. She gave up trying not to laugh out loud, she'd already pissed off the people on their phones, if their death glares were any indication.
"Bryce, what's wrong with you?!" she managed, still laughing as they got off on their floor.
"It had to be done. We had too many floors to go with those two on their phones."
"Oh my god. I'm so embarassed."
"Don't be. I'd choose your laugh any day but especially over that." he assured her with a smile.
They dropped off the files and quickly found themselves at their next destination. Nicole's expression went from surprise to confusion.
"This is the cafeteria. This is the important thing? The really important thing?"
"Oh, absolutely. Take a look." he pointed to the menu over the coffee bar.
"Volunteerista Nicolachino: a triple mocha mint frappucino" she read the week's theme featured drink from the chalkboard menu chuckled and blushed. "Really?"
"I think they heard it was popular with someone who's here a lot.
"You did this."
"A little bit." he admitted.
"Thank you. I think."
Cringeworthy name aside, she liked that she wouldn't have to go through the tedious process of explaining her particular coffee addiction again. The number of shots of mint needed to balance the mocha perfectly, the double whipped cream and shaved dark chocolate atop. It was a both art and science in a cup that equalled caffeinated divinity. And the best thing of all was that Bryce had thought about her enough to take note of it. As a friend he'd already outpaced any boyfriend she'd ever had.
"You want to thank me? Have coffee with me. My treat."
"Deal. I'll go claim a table." she agreed and began to walk off before stopping short and asking, "Nicolachino?"
"Hey, not my fault. You order a specialty coffee that's not on the menu twice a day for a month and this is the price you pay." he explained trying to maintain an innocent face.
She nodded and continued on her table search while he placed their order.
"Here ya go. One Nicolachino and to make up for the lame name, your favorite cupcake." he said as he set them on the table along with two 1989 pennies.
"Red velvet. Thanks, Bryce." She contemplated the oversized cupcake swathed in a cloud of whipped frosting. "How'd you know it was my favorite?"
"The Christmas party last year, at Dr. Benford's. We were standing by the table and there were cupcakes on that tree cakestand thing. You said you were glad you'd snagged the last red velvet because it was your all time favorite."
"And you remembered that?" she asked, surprised.
She'd remembered that moment too and that Bryce had seemed preoccupied and had hardly taken any notice of her having spoken in the first place, let alone committed to memory what she'd said to recall it many months later. She considered giving up her running count of reasons her heart continued in its freefall over him.
"Of course."
When she was around Bryce time seemed to slow down. Maybe it was that she wasn't preoccupied with it during those moments. Their conversations existed in these little bubbles outside of everything else that was going on. Moments sequestered from definite or possible futures. He was a good thing that happened to her as a result of the blackout. She was sure of it. She'd undertaken volunteering as a way to atone for some future unknown thing she'd do and attempt to avert it altogether. Maybe he was there for her to appreciate the time she'd had left and not be caught up in perpetual fear. Maybe he was supposed to be the love of her life, however short-lived. Her future was still one part questionmark and two parts dark. But her present? That was easy. Her feelings were unmistakable. She was absolutely in love with him. So when he asked her if she wanted to hang out with him that evening, she had to say yes.
