Heart pounding, I walked through the familiar Chicago tavern. Over the years, this building had become the place where most of the ER staff had come to eat, unwind and relax after a hard day's work. Now it was the place they all reconnected after separating in different directions.
They were the reason that I was alive today, and the reason I had my husband and two beautiful children. If you would have asked me how my life would have been fifteen years from now, I would have probably told you that I didn't know. All I could think of the time was how much my life had gone wrong, so I attempted to take my life away by popping pills that I stole from the hospital.
It was the most heartbreaking decision that I had ever made, and I would always regret making that decision. However, I would never regret living, because I was here. I had been able to help a lot of people along the way. With everyone sitting at that table, I had been able to experience joy, sorrow, anger, love. It was a beautiful thing. Something that I grew to cherish as time went on.
Walking across the room, I watched as Carter's eyes lit up with surprise, a pleasant smile on his lips. He had been the only one to notice as he leaned back in his seat and cleared his throat.
"Got room for one more?"
"Nooo!" Susan paused mid-sentence in the conversation, a smile plastered to her face as she turned around in her seat. "Carol Hathaway. How the heck are you?" Still in a bit of shock, she stood up slowly and wrapped her hands around me in a tight hug.
"I'm really good, thanks for asking."
When she finally let go, she had tears glistening in her eyes. "And the girls?"
"They're almost ten and growing like weeds.
"Ten. . . really?" Carter inquired as he shook his head with disbelief as he rounded the table and hugged me.
"On Thanksgiving."
"That's right. Not sure how I could have forgotten that." He went to go sit back down as Kerry stood up and scooped me into a hug, right after Carter let go and stood off to the side.
"Carol. It's so good to see you again."
"Hi Kerry." Was all I could think to say. As we continued to stand there in in a tight hug, I couldn't help but notice the lack of a crutch that I had always seen her use around the hospital.
"What have you done to your hair?" She pulled away and started played with my straightened black hair.
"After I moved back with Doug, I decided to start straightening it. Where's the crutch?"
"I had surgery on my hip about three years ago, so I'm happy to say that I am done with the crutch. Heaven knows it made me both look and feel like a scrooge."
"Not possible." I laughed, clearly joking with her.
"Honestly, I never thought I would see you again." Elizabeth mentioned giving me a longer hug than any of the other two.
"Well, I'm here."
"Yes you are." Elizabeth's voice was full of emotion. "And clearly more beautiful than ever. You said the twins were almost ten now?"
"Mhmm." I couldn't resist pulling out my phone. "Kate has my dark hair, while Tess' hair is straight as can be." I handed her my phone, so that I could say hello to Peter, then a seat in the middle of him and Carter. Speaking of carbon copies, hello Rachel."
"Hi. . . Carol. It's so good to see you again."
"It's good to see you too."
"What have you been up to?"
"I actually just applied for medical school."
"Oh yeah, where?"
"Duke. Elizabeth is on faculty there, so we kind of get to stay together."
"Well, I'm sure your father would be proud with the direction you're heading."
"Thanks." Rachel blushed slightly. "And what about you, what are you up to these days?"
"I'm-"
"Sorry to interrupt your conversations, but my name is Kami. What can I get you all to drink this evening?" The waitress inquired, standing at the front of the table.
"I would like a margarita, no salt." Rachel piped in without missing a beat.
"White wine, please." I told her quickly, turning back to Rachel. "So, Doug and I live in Seattle now, and I am a transplant coordinator."
"That's neat. So do you get to do transplants for anyone you know?"
"We don't always know where the organs go to."
"Red wine for me." Kerry's voice carried over the growing noise of the tavern.
"I'll have the same as her." Susan pointed to Kerry. The waitress nodded and scribbled their orders down, then looked over at Carter.
"Water is just fine for me." Carter chimed in.
"Well if he's having water, I'll have a beer for him." Peter joked, wrapping his arm around his neck, with a gentle head rubbing.
"Okay. I will get that right out for you."
"Thank you." Elizabeth said in appreciation and the conversation went back to how it had been a few minutes ago.
"No beer for Carter. Now that's one I've never heard before." Susan teased with a laugh.
"Oh you know, I promised I would stop drinking so much after I had a kidney transplant." Carter admitted with a subtle laugh. Our eyes met, although just briefly as I thought about the organ that had been transferred to County. Had he been here for that? Was he the doctor that her coworkers had been referring to?
"A kidney transplant from-"
"Yeah."
"Sorry." Susan winced. Although almost nine years had passed since Carter had been stabbed by a schizophrenic patient, the subject still felt like it should still be a touchy one. He had barely survived that day, but med student Lucy Knight had actually died from her injuries.
"No, it's okay. I just decided that after that happened that I would working on taking care of myself better than I have. I occasionally have a drink, but today is not one of those days."
"You're a brave man, John Carter." Susan said with a smile, her chin resting against her hand.
He gave her a quiet nod of appreciation as he sat back and observed, letting the happy chatter of friends wash over him. As he did, the question still remained: was Dr. John Carter the doctor who her colleagues had been referring to?
"So does anyone want to see what a real doctor does for a living?" Carter inquired as they finally stepped out of the tavern around one AM.
"Ah yes, a doctor in a underfunded, over-utilized insane asylum that passes for a urban medical center." Susan pitched in skeptically with a laugh.
"I'm in!" Rachel chimed in without missing a beat.
"Oh no, it's very late." Elizabeth protested with a shake of her head.
"Don't start."
"Well, how are you going to get back to the hotel?"
"I'll call a cab."
"Come on, she's not a baby anymore. We'll make sure she gets back safe." Susan promised, waving off Elizabeth's concern.
"You coming Kerry?" Carter inquired to their former boss.
"No, I've got an early flight." Kerry mentioned, her short hair blowing in the cool breeze.
"Peter?"
"Eh, 7 AM rounds."
"Carol? For good times sake?"
"Why not? My flight isn't until tomorrow afternoon."
"There's my cab." Kerry gestured over to the blue and white taxi cab that had just pulled up to the curb. "Susan." Pulling Susan in for a cheek kiss, they hugged tightly. She made her way over to Carter and hugged him just as tightly, then crossed over to me. "Carol. I'm so glad you made it."
"I'm glad I did too. It was a lot of fun catching up with all of you."
Kerry smiled, brushing her hand with my cheek before quickly kissing Rachel and Elizabeth goodbye, while giving Peter's hand a tight squeeze before saying goodbye. "Alright, bye guys!" Carter and Peter hugged, before turning back to me, Susan and Rachel.
"Well, ready?"
As Susan wrapped her hand through Carter's, Peter chuckled and Elizabeth worriedly called out to Rachel "Hey! Our flight leaves at nine. Car is coming to pick us up at the hotel at seven." They all giggled as they rounded the corner towards the hospital.
"Has she always been like that?" Carter inquired, pointing in the direction where they had come from.
"After Dad died, let's say she became a bit protective."
"Yeah, I'd say." Susan brushed a few stray hairs, then shoved her hand back into her coat pocket. "Have any of you been back to County recently?"
"I was here earlier for an interview, but other than that I haven't been back here since I was a little girl." Rachel chimed in, drawing her coat in tighter.
"I can't say I've been back since I left to Washington." I pitched in, trying to carefully avoid all patches of ice that had formed on the asphalt.
"Not for many years." Susan added. "But I heard there was a shoot out in the ER about three years ago."
"Really?" Rachel raised her eyebrows in surprise.
"Yeah, I heard about that as well." Carter sighed deeply, rubbing just above his eyebrow. "A nurse's ex-husband decided to shoot up the place."
"Who?" Susan asked, her tone now filled with curiosity.
"Samantha Taggart, I believe was her name."
"Samantha Taggart." I repeated, trying to pinpoint where I had heard that name before. "I think I've met her before. I remember she had dark brown hair just past her shoulders, and she came with another doctor—oh who was possibly Indian decent with short black hair.
"That almost sounds like Dr. Neela Ragostra." Susan pointed out. "I worked with her for awhile before leaving County."
"Then that's probably where we met. She was picking up a kidney with Dr. Ragostra." I recalled as we stopped just beside the sliding door of the
"For who? A patient?"
"When the hospital was shot up, was everyone okay?" Rachel inquired with slight concern.
Carter took in a sharp breath, then nodded in agreement. "Some people were hurt, but ultimately everyone was okay in the end." He looked towards the doors where a young couple was headed into the ER. The woman looked heavily pregnant and looked highly uncomfortable, which probably meant she would be giving birth very soon.
"Perhaps we should go in before we freeze." Susan suggested as it began snowing. They all laughed and quickly walked inside where a familiar face was standing behind the desk.
"Jerry!" Carter greeted the tall and scruffy looking receptionist. "You remember, Rachel."
"Hey, I heard you were around."
"Hi you remember me?" Susan inquired to Jerry as he held out his arms to hug her. "Jerry, you remember Carol?"
"Hi Jerry."
"Of course I remember you." Jerry gave me a grizzly hug. "How are you?"
"I'm good."
"Good. And the girls?"
"They're doing good. Tess and Kate are both love school and living in Washington. My mom moved to be closer to us about two years ago."
"Can you believe that?" Susan exclaimed with a smirk, to which Jerry shook his head. "What I really can't believe is Cosmo started kindergarten this year. Makes me this tempted to have another one." Susan held her fingers up a little more more than two inches away from each other.
"I brought pictures just in case." Grabbing my wallet out of my purse, I had a whole string of small photos of the girls from when they were a baby, to their age now. Susan happily brought out some pictures of Cosmo and together we reminisced into the night.
