A/N: Right, basic disclaimer. Rated M of course xD isn't every one of my fanfics? Haha no wait...I think one isn't ;D go me. This fanfic starts at the very start of New Moon where Edward tells Bella he's leaving her, awww -shuns Edward- silly silly Eddy! I think I might make some of this Jake/Bella? Not sure how much, cuz honestly...this is as far as I've got with this fic / will write some more now : I think I might have on some of this Bella a bit rebellious lol, a lot more than just jumping of a cliff and riding a motorbike, oh yes. Haha, well thanks for reading darls, & review if you do pleasee , makes all the difference, and determines how fast I write & upload the next chapter : thankies my fellow twihard fanpires ; enjoy.

Prologue

My heart was breaking, it was official. It was...shattering to pieces. I was falling apart, I couldn't think straight, all I could think about was him, and he...left, just left me here, here in the middle of the woods. He just walked away...well, ran...wait, he ran. Why did he run? Did he think I'd come after him, pleading with him to stay? He actually thought I was that pathetic? I shook my head sharply, and grasped tightly with my left hand the thick branch that I was holding onto, I actually hadn't noticed I was holding onto it, but now I realised how big of a part it played in how I was still standing. I could feel a part of it digging roughly into my palm, but I didn't, couldn't, let go. The anger overcame me, and I shot my right fist out into the tree in front of me. I heard it before I felt it, and then there it was, the pain. It seared through my knuckles, and for one little tenth of a second, I forgot. I forgot all about him, I forgot why I was here, I forgot...everything, everything that had happened that night. And now, I...wait, how stupid will this sound? Well, I...I knew I was alive. I know I'm not making any sense but, it makes sense to me. Before, I didn't exist, not to him, not to me. I wasn't there. But now, now I was. I had proof I was, and...I liked that knowledge. I brought my hand up to inspect the damage, it was quite worse than I expected, guess I'm that weak huh? But really, I couldn't tell just how bad it was, because all my knuckles were covered in blood, and it dripped down the side of my closed fist, the droplets making their way to the ground. I removed my other hand from the branch I was holding onto, and for one small second I was sure I would fall to my knees, but, thankfully, I didn't. I looked at the palm of my left hand, there was a small gouge, but it was nothing compared to my other hand. I stared at both of my hands, and a cold laugh escaped my lips. I laughed, why did I laugh? I wasn't so sure myself. Maybe I was going crazy, hmm that could be it.

I don't want you... suddenly those words sounded in my mind, his words. They rang clearly in my head as if he was standing right beside me. How could this happen? It was all going so well. Was it because of the incident at my party? Or was it actually because--my breath caught in the back of my throat as the realisation of what he had said suddenly hit me like i had walked into oncoming traffic--he didn't want me...
I stood there for what felt like 2 minutes, but by looking at the watch on my wrist it had been just about 2 hours. I don't think I could have moved even if I wanted to...but now, now my legs seemed to move on their own, and I was running, running through the woods the way I came in. The wind was strong and holding me back, as if it wanted me to stay in there forever, maybe that would have been best, it's not like anybody wanted me... I ran faster through the woods, and pushed my way roughly--ignoring the shooting pain running through my hand--through some branches, and they scratched and scraped at my exposed arms... And then I was out, I was out of the woods, but I was still running, running in the direction of my house, although really I had no clue what I was doing, or where I was going, my legs seemed to have developed a mind of their own, and I was going along with it, it didn't matter what happened to me now, I didn't care.