A Part of Us

We are poles apart. If he is the cold winter, I am the bright summer. He is blue, I am pink, no stereotyping intended. He is the storm waiting to break and I am the soft wind. He is a morning person, I am a coffee person. He is the mystery guy and I am the open book.

How, then, are we together. Everyone wants to know the answer probably. To be honest, I don't know and I am pretty sure he doesn't either. We just click. He has broken many hearts just by being with me for so long and maybe I have too. Yes, I do give myself some amount of credit.

Anyways, as I just stand here and watch him, the rock star Yamato Ishida giving autographs, I cannot help but smile as he gently pushes off this crazy woman trying to touch him all over the place. The crowds are going crazy. They just want to touch him. I know he just wants to push them all away and run. He never enjoys attention that much, maybe because growing up he was never used to it.

He may seem like a cold wolf, in fact even the media refers to him as the ice star but I am proud to know that I am the only person who knew that the ice within him thaws pretty easily. They should just see him every time I make a puppy dog face at him. I know how to get things done my way. Or every time he gets the hang of a new tune. He behaves like a baby at that time. Or the childish tantrums he throws if you make him eat broccoli. Or the look when he attempts to be romantic and fails miserably. Or when he calls me Princess Mimi and I hate it because I don't like being reminded of certain embarrassing details of stuff I did when I was nine which Tai can't keep to himself.

Why do I think this right now, standing far away from the crowds and the eyes of the media? Because he asked me to. No, he is not self- obsessed. I am jealous. Yes, as sure about him as I am, I have my moments. Being a celebrity girlfriend is not easy.

He could be dating the hottest of the women, the smartest of them and the most amazing of them. But he stays with an ordinary girl with a regular job and who has an obsession with pink so much that she has half their house painted pink.

Every time I see women throw themselves at him, every time I see those marry me posters, every time crazy teenagers jump around him and ask him when he is going to be single, I feel insecure. I feel insecure when the media keeps firing questions at us about our relationship. I feel insecure when the neighbour tries to flirt with him. I feel insecure when people recognize me on the streets and excitedly ask me the most random questions about him. I feel insecure every time my colleagues just want one chance to talk him. Because all of this makes me feel like I am letting some part of him…. Some part of us…. Out to the world where it doesn't belong. A part which should solely be ours. I don't want us to. I want him to be mine.

I never let him know, but one attempted kiss by Jun and lots of arguments and crying later, I just had to let him know before we went into crumbles. And that is when he told me everything that I just thought about standing here and watching him handle a crowd of admirers. There were things that we shared, that nobody could ever know. There was a side to him the world would never see but I would because I am as special to him as he is to me. The world doesn't get to see his happiness, his laughter, his tantrums, his anger, his sorrow, his fears, his antics, his inner child and most important that special smile he saves only for me.

So, yes I do get insecure even though I say a blatant no to the media but I know that he is mine and always will be because even though a part of us is out in the world, a bigger more important part is still with us.

I feel his hands in mine and that smile I just talked about as he suddenly kisses me bringing me out of my thoughts. Apparently, he managed to get free of the post-concert crowd. I hear awwws in the background and certain wails of disappointment at the fact that we are still together.

And looking into his eyes once more, I know that those wails of disappointment will live on for a long long time.

Hey everyone, it has been quite a long time since I posted something and this time I tried my hand at a writing style which is completely new to me. I have never tried monologues before and I know I could do better but this is just a first timer to break out of the same style I have been using for the past four and a half years so yeah as always criticism(constructive) is welcome!

Do review! It makes my day!