So this is my next project, heading on back to Animal Crossing. Haven't done anything for this section of the site before, so why not? Autumn seems to be coming to New Leaf soon, things are changing, should be fun to experience.

Anyhow, the idea for this story came about when I realized I've had this freaking game since day one and I've yet to get a request to build the Police Station, keep in mind I have every other building constructed in town, even the fucking Fortune Shop, do you know how hard it is to build that place? Very.

The premise should be simple, each week, our official elected represented down-in-the-dumps mayor receives a letter of social retardation from one of the town's villagers. For the most part, each letter will be regarding a suggestion for a new Public Works Project for the town. After performing a quick skim of each request, the mayor will decide whether to approve or deny said recommendation. If it passes, more power to the town, if not, well then shit, no tourism for you.

If you can, please review, even if it's not really your thing. It keeps me doing this until I keel over. Be it positive or not, I'll always respond back by the next chapter, it's just how I do these things. Anyways, this A/N is taking too much space, here we go.

Word Count: 675 words.


Misanthropic Mayoral Duties: Requests to a Pessimistic Front-Runner

Req .01: Punchy's Sonata


Dicktown is, for lack of better word, full of dicks. A town in the middle of nowhere where everyone is peaceful, but at the same time, not even aware of what they're doing half the time.

A mostly undeveloped town with tons of space to spare for generally anything, but with a lack of funding so low that the thought of actual progress was almost laughable by all means.

In fact, the only person in town with bells that exceed the amount of four digits is the mayor himself, and that was just by daily grinding alone. However, by no means is he a miracle worker. Everything comes at a price, a convincing reason for construction, and a justification on why he should spend his millions of dollary-doos funding said construction.

A vexatious wasp flies over Town Hall, his buzzing just oozing intentional harassment.

The insomniac mayor sits in his revolving chair, yet no amount of casual spinning can save him from the enigmatic hellhole that is running a town full of mindless animals who care only about stupid shit, like fishing or who can be the first to capture a stag beetle.

A group of ravaging cicadas cry outside as loud as they can, as the sunlight glistens into the darkened office.

His eyes, bloodshot and sullen, his shoulders can't sulk any lower. With black hair that is but a tiring chore to tame, it sits tangled and unruly atop his head.

Dust has settled on his desk, caking his farce-gold plate engraved with his name and political title, as well as the frame of his loving mother.

"I hate this fucking job."

Not even five seconds later, light shines into the office as a furbait paw opens the doorknob. The mayor covers his eyes from the blinding light, too adjusted from the darkness to adapt to such a sudden change.

It is Isabelle, his overly-bubbly and benevolent cohort who would want nothing more than to serve aside her boss until the end of time.

He just thinks she's an annoying cunt. Because she kindais, all things considered.

She isn't aware of any of this though, like every other unintelligent peon in town. With a stride and a wag of her bell-ringing tail that does nothing but scream burning bush, she makes her way to his desk.

"Hello, mayor! How are you today?"

He mumbles something, he doesn't even know what, like a mixture of the words 'fine' and 'okay'.

"That's great! I had a good morning, I drank my mocha and I'm ready to help you out! So, to do just that, I took in a request for a Public Works Project, and I need you to approve of it so we can start construction on it!" she notes in a beaming tone.

It's sad that he can't even jack off to that. It's just not his pudding.

After getting a half-assed response from a mayor who's too tired to even care anymore, the blissful dog retrieves an envelope from her inventory, and hands it to him.

"This suggestion came from Punchy, come back to me when you have a decision!" with that, Isabelle exits the office, leaving the mayor alone with a letter and an unwilling attitude.

But to get it over with, he opens the envelope and reads the request.

"Hey mayor, mrmpht! The other day I was knee-deep in a stromboli the size of a house, but I remembered that it was a Friday, mrmpht! See mayor, I have this thing where if I eat turnovers on a Friday, I get a horrible nightmare! But, I was also drinking orange juice at the time, and orange juice helps cleanse the soul, mrmpht! So that night, I had a good dream about pixies roaming about a delicate flower field, and that's why I think we should have a Fairy-Tale Streetlight in town, mrmpht!"

After giving the suggestion a quick, non-biased, and thorough review, the battered mayor doesn't even spend a minute on it before coming to a concrete conclusion.

Denied.