I stared at my Paris France poster; I hated this poster but loved it at the same time. It was incredibly beautiful; who ever had taken this picture is very talented. Plus I love France. But this poster also represented memories, bad memories.
I had been awake for over 30 minutes but I hadn't stopped staring at this poster. Today was the day; I had gone through the procedures with the doctor yesterday I knew I would be fine; it was rare for anything to go wrong. But still what if something happened. What if this didn't work? I shook that thought from my mind it was impossible this had to work, then I would be done, then I could move on.
I got out from bed and headed for my shower compared to the poster the rest of my room - apartment was boring. This is what happens when you're on a budget, I had been saving up money to redecorate, but well this happened.
I let the hot water fall all over me, washing away dirt and the memories, it weird but every time I take a shower or bath, it just helps me to forget the world, everything that was bad, sad.
I wrapped a towel around me and headed back to my room. What do you were to something like this. Well people will be judging me anyway so I shouldn't be too worried, I wonder if any protectors will be there, well its Tuesday so probably not. I finally decided on white and gold tank top with some old worn in jeans and gold heels, one of my favorite outfits. I then quickly ran my hair through a brush and put on some lip gloss, well I guess I am ready I thought as I looked in the mirror, I grabbed my purse and headed out the door.
It only took me ten minutes to get to Planned Parenthood; I stared at the few protesters who were there. With picket signs and some gross pictures. It was a Tuesday and I was surprised any protesters were there. Don't these people have jobs? I thought or even a life, oh that's right there trying to save my "babies".
I rolled my eyes and parked my car I tired to concentrate on my annoyance with the protestors and not the fast beating of my heart. "Calm down" I whispered to myself as I took a slow deep breath. Everything will be fine and things will go well, all this will end. It just has too.
I glanced at my reflection worried blue eyes stared back at me and straight brown hair laid neatly to my waist. I took another deep breath as I grabbed a hair tie and put my hair up in a bun. I opened my purse and grabbed my sun glasses, the last thing I needed was for those people to see I was worried. I closed my purse and then left the comfort of my car.
I faked some confidence by walking with my head up and shoulders down. This would be the most annoying part of the whole thing. Walking to a building with people shoving pictures and signs in my face while screaming; "don't kill your baby". I swear I have heard the same people complain about how many people are on welfare.
I had almost managed to get by without a confrontation when some elder woman stepped in front of me concern and worry written all over her face.
"Please miss, don't kill your baby, you don't need to kill your baby."Trying to be Polite and respectful I replied with, "This is my business not yours." I then walked passed her. I was almost at the door when I heard her shout "MURDER!"walked back up to her and said "you don't know me nor my story, so don't judge me!" I didn't bother to wait for a response I turned my back and entered the building.
This was my second time being in this building. The first time they did a physical, pregnancy test, ultrasound, sign forms and fill out forms then schedule the time of my appointment; Tuesday 10:00 am. I checked glanced at my watch "9:55". Not too bad I thought as I continued to walk to the reception desk.
A nice looking lady in her mid twenties, she had straight shoulder length natural red hair and her eyes were a sparkly brown. She smiled when she saw me and asked.
"How can I help you?
"I have an appointment at 10:00."
"What is your name?"
"Katharine Lavirtcha."
"Okay Miss Lavirtcha. You're doctor is running late today but he will be here as soon as he can. The waiting room is on you're right."
"Thank you" I replied.
Great I thought I am on time, the doctor is not. I shook my head as I turned towards the waiting room. Which is a rectangle shaped with off white walls and standard grayish carpet. On each of the longer sides there were three windows with no curtains. On the other two walls there was each a painting; one was a landscape of mountains and the other was more of a poster that read "every child a wanted child, every choice her choice." Outlining the room was a whole bunch of cushy bluish-gray chairs. With small white dots scattered about, each corner of the room had either a table full of magazines and newspapers, or a plant.
There were three other girls in the room, One was on the right side of the room was a girl who looked around 14; she has curly blonde hair that was in a bun with bright green eyes. She had some headphones on, but seemed too worried to be really listening since she was also biting the nails of her left hand. To her right sat I presumed her mom she too had curly blonde hair but her eyes were a pale blue, she was reading a magazine but also holding the girl's right hand.
A couple sat directly across from where I was standing, the girl looked around 24 and the boy 26. Both the girl and the boy had thick black hair, but the girl had some light reddish blond highlights and dark brown eyes. She also looked a bit worried but tried to hide it. The boy had gorgeous green eyes; his were more of a deep emerald green unlike then blond girl, who's were a light grass green, I couldn't really tell what he was feeling he had an emotionless look.
Two girls, both looking around 19 and they sat on the left side of the room. One girl had a pixie hairstyle; the color was light blond with blue and green highlights, her eyes we a very light grey. Her friend had straight bright purple hair no longer then her chin which brought out her dark indigo eyes. They both seemed pretty calm so I couldn't tell which one was here for an appointment.
I debated were to sit. Each girl sat on each side of the room with whom ever they were with; finally I decided to sit in the corner of the two girls and the Hispanic couple. I grabbed an old Seventeen Magazine and quickly flipped through the pages, I tossed the magazine back on the table. I suddenly felt weird, realizing I was the only one here alone. I had no one here to talk to nor to comfort me, I had to do this all by myself.
