Don't know what inspired this little one shot, but here it is! I took some artistic license, of course, so just pretend Lily's parents die the next day. Morbid, I know, but that should stop people from fussing over how Harry's grandparents have died.
I really don't recommend fussing over any factual errors, I've already admitted they're there and I don't really plan on fixing them. Hope you enjoy the story.
"No, Mum, I'm telling you, he really does! He already sleeps through the night! He sleeps as if he's already a teenager!" Lily laughed as her mother tried to tell her she was wrong about her own son. "He really and truly does!"
Lily paced around her kitchen, tangling herself up in the chord of the only phone her husband allowed in the house. Every time it rang, he jumped about three feet, and whenever his wife was out of the house, he took it off the hook.
"Actually, Harry's in clothes for his own age, why would he need 18-month-old outfits?" Lily paused to listen, "You're joking! Dudley's that big already?! He and Harry are practically the same age, how can he be so big?" Lily choked on a laugh as she listened to the response, "Vernon's how big?! You're joking! Poor, poor Tunie!"
Lily watched as her dishes washed themselves, thinking of all the times she'd washed them by hand growing up.
"No, James still hasn't talked his friends into taking the plunge, too, as they like to put it. I wish someone would, though. It'd be nice to have easy access friends for Harry to grow up with. I don't think Sirius will ever settle down, he's really the wildest of them all. Remus would be an excellent father, though! If only someone could convince him to settle down…"
"The other friend? Oh, Peter? I doubt he'll ever get married. He makes me a bit nervous, to be honest. Don't tell James, though! They've been friends for so long, he'd be hurt if I secretly didn't like him."
Lily caught herself as she tripped over Harry's unicorn doll, or action figure as her husband insisted on referring to it, for the millionth time.
"Actually, we don't talk anymore…Relieved! Oh, Mother, you are awful…Well, I know Tunie never liked him, but she never liked anyone I went to school with…No, we haven't talked for awhile…
"I've thought about it, I guess I will start working once Harry gets a bit older. Unless we have more kids…Mum! My eardrum! Please! I'm not pregnant right now! James and I are just talking about it. The possibility of it. I think three is a good number, but you know James, he wants six."
Lily stopped walking and set herself down in a kitchen chair and listened with some outrage.
"What do you mean I need to make sure Harry's normal before thinking about more kids?! Of course he's normal!
"Most boys aren't talking at this age, two is normal, and he already says Da-da and I swear he said Mum yesterday, but James doesn't believe me.
"You haven't mentioned Dudley talking at all…Well he's the size of an eight-year-old from the sound of it, so he should probably talk like one."
"Oh come on, Mum, it was a little bit funny!"
"Yes, yes, I'm very sorry, I know you love BOTH your grandsons. No, no, Harry loves the toy you sent him…"
Lily rolled her eyes as she thought of the doll Harry had promptly ripped apart last week.
"Oh, got to go, Mum! I hear Harry and James coming in the door, and Harry is undoubtedly fussy, James took him out through his nap,
"Of course I'll call you after Halloween! We're thinking of dressing Harry up like a quidditch player, it'll be darling!
"Oh, sorry, it's a sport. Forgot you didn't know…I need to get his costume ready, Halloween's only a week away! Just think, Harry's first Halloween…soon it'll be his first Christmas! Oh, I'm so excited, I love the holidays! I don't want to miss a thing for Harry's first holidays!
"I promise, I'll send nice, still pictures you can show your friends, but I really must go now! Love you too, Mum. Bye- bye."
Lily walked in to her living room, not surprised to see that Harry was making sure his father was not having an easy time getting Harry's jacked off.
"Mumeeeee!" Harry yelled, running to her with his arms open and his jacket half on.
"Harry! Did you have fun with Daddy?"
Harry nodded, looking over at his exasperated father.
"You know what happens next week? Halloween!" Lily told the excited little boy, "It's going to be a very exciting night, I promise!"
