Post Catching Fire

Katniss/Peeta

Lyrics from Avril Lavinge's "When Your Gone"

DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Hunger Games, It belongs to the lovely Suzanne Collins.

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you

"PEEETTTTTAAAAAA!" I'm screaming, drenched in my own sweat, trying to shake myself out of the nightmares that have become reality. The people aboard the hovercraft quit running to my aid a while ago…Many scream echo through the corridors these days. Between Finnick and I though…I think we drown out most of the others. Gale used to try and comfort me, until I cruelly yelled at him one night, saying how he could never be Peeta, could never be as good. Would never know what I went through in the games, would never know how to make the nightmares stop. Would never know how to break me from this stupor.

I lay here now, my hand clutched tight around the last thing I have of Peeta. The pearl. I hold it to my heart now, eyes clenched tight, seeing only the clear blue pools that belong to the one I miss so much.

When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too

I miss his words, his ability to lie so convincingly. I desire the warmth of his embrace. I remember every moment we spent together. Every lie we lived. Every part of it that stirred something in the pit of my stomach.

When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through
The day and make it ok
I miss you

The rebellion needs me, or so Haymitch says. He comes to see me everyday. Although are conversations usually end in arguments about heading to the Capitol to rescue Peeta…he still comes back. Even when he says he won't. Sometimes I think he's trying to convince himself to put the rebellion first. He drinks away his emotions most of the time though, so I'm stuck to deal with the snarky, arrogant, sarcastic Haymitch Abernathy that hates me.

But how am I supposed to help the country when I can't even deal with the fact that the Capitol has Peeta? I walk around with a giant hole gapping in my chest. How am I supposed to place hope in other peoples hearts when there is not a drop of it in mine? Who knows? Peeta could already be dead. The thought makes me blanch. No, not Peeta. Regardless of the consequences, I know I am going to have to get to him soon… or it'll be the death of both of us.

So when Haymitch walks through that door today, I will have the answer he has been so obviously seeking. I was the spark that lit the rebellion, and I will stand and fan the fire until it fully engulfs the Capitol. And everything they stand for. The idea's they enforce will not exist. And I will fight until there is not a breath left in my body.

But first, I will get the boy that gave me hope, when the situation was hopeless. And to this day, is still doing that. He's being helping me through the rough spots since he received the beating to give me the burnt bread that saved my family. He's been hurt so many time's because of me. This will be the end of that. A compromise is in order. And I know Haymitch will accept, because I am the girl on fire. The girl who if she was lost, hope would be also. The girl that the capitol never intended on existing and tried to exterminate to many times to count. Because I am the mockingjay.


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