Send Me An Angel
By: Hitokiri Musei
Rated: K+
Summary: Dean never realized how much Castiel meant to him until he vanished. Destiel if you squint and tilt your head. Set after season 5 finale.
Warnings: First Supernatural fic; been a fan for a while, but never really thought about writing in the fandom. And then I was listening to "Send Me An Angel" by Zeromancer, and I just had to get this out. Pretty short one, but I'm hoping that I can get an idea for a chaptered fic before too long...
I don't own Supernatural, nor "Send Me An Angel" by Zeromancer.
Looking back on it now, it was hard to realize that it was really all over.
Staring out of the front window from where he was resting on the hotel bed, Dean Winchester shifted his arm further beneath the pillow, letting out a sigh before closing his hazel eyes. It was far too quiet in the room; Sam's soft, breathy snores were gone from his life, and he found it odd that he couldn't sleep without them there. He had never had trouble sleeping before, but now, missing that one, simple noise that let him know his brother was there, he could hardly fall asleep.
It had been a month since Lucifer had fallen back into the pit, taking Sam and what was left of Dean's life with him. Dean had no desire to continue; but he had made a promise, and he would attempt to continue to live, if nothing else. He had stayed with Lisa for a week, but had been unable to adjust to real life, and had left her following the lead of a poltergeist in a nearby town.
He hadn't been back since.
Hunting was his life, and there was nothing that would change that. In fact, it was really all that he had left now.
Dean huffed faintly, rolling onto his back before clasping his hands behind his head, resigned to the fact that he was going to spend another night sleepless. He wanted some sort of company, not used to being by himself, but he wasn't sure what he wanted. Usually it was simply a matter of finding a woman to stay with him, but he had no desire for a woman's touch.
It wasn't as simple as that, not this time. He needed someone who understood what had happened to him, someone that he could talk to without fear and reservations. Unfortunately he had lost that along with Sammy. He briefly considered Bobby, but while he loved the old hunter as a father, Bobby couldn't fill that void in his broken, beaten heart.
So he sat, alone, lonely, in the dark, wondering what was happening to him, and wondering where life could possibly go from here.
His mind wandered, and, surprisingly, moved to someone that he hadn't really thought about in some time.
Castiel.
The memory of the angel's intense blue eyes and ruffled black hair made him open his eyes, and Dean wondered briefly if Castiel would even look like that anymore. They hadn't spoken since that day, and he hadn't seen the serious angel either.
An ache shot through his chest, and with a frown the hunter rubbed at his sternum in an attempt to soothe the phantom pain. He missed Castiel, an intense feeling that he realized now he had been burying in his grief. Sam was gone, and so was Cas, and he had no one to be with him when he desperately needed someone to just be with him.
Sighing again, Dean raised himself out of the bed, resting his elbows on his knees and his forehead on his fists. His head ached faintly, and he pushed the pain out of his head before raising his eyes to the ceiling; to the sky.
"I don't know if you can hear me, Cas, but I..." he paused, his voice choked from him before he could even continue. "I need you." he forced out, pushing back the lump that had risen in his throat. "I need someone. God, I don't know if I can keep doing this on my own."
He faded off, suppressing the shaking that had overtaken his limbs and breathing out in order to stem the wetness that had pressed at his eyes. As he had expected, there was no answer to what he had said, and with a shuddering sort of sigh he ground his teeth. "Should have known... Feathered bastard wouldn't answer even if he had heard me..."
"What makes you believe that I would ignore you, Dean?"
The deep, gravelly voice made Dean start slightly, his head shooting up so hazel eyes met stormy blue, and Dean's mouth fell open slightly in surprise. "You... You heard me?"
Castiel nodded slightly, corner of his lips twitching in amusement. "Of course. I have kept an eye on you, Dean, even though I have been gone."
A moment of silence fell between the two of them, and then Dean allowed his eyes to move up and down Cas's body. "I didn't think you'd look the same, having gone back to Heaven and all."
"Jimmy Novak is dead and gone, however, I was able to keep his form after obtaining... special permission." Castiel replied, a faint hint of amusement coloring his tone.
Dean raised an eyebrow, and then a smirk tugged at his own lips despite his reluctance to smile. "I guess that's a good thing, having some random ass person appear in my room would be downright weird."
Cas huffed softly, but didn't speak for a long moment. He stood quietly near the window, and then moved forward, hesitating only a moment before sitting beside Dean on the bed. "I have been... concerned for you." he began, his voice hesitant in a way that Dean had rarely heard from him. "And your words earlier..."
"Don't bother with them." Dean said gruffly, turning away from Cas to look down at the bedsheets, toying absently with the spread. "I was just thinking out-loud."
"You said my name."
That simple sentence made Dean look back into those intense eyes, and he was surprised to see a softness in them that he had never noticed before. Silence reigned for a moment more between them, and then Dean flinched as he felt something touch his opposite shoulder, something warm and foreign.
Startled, the hunter flinched towards Castiel slightly, head whirling to catch sight of what was touching him, and then his eyes widened and his mouth dropped open in surprise.
White feathers brushed against his shoulder, extending down past his knees and nearly to the floor. His eyes traveled up the soft fluff, and then turned to look at Cas, who was watching him quietly. The glimmering wings somehow fit him perfectly, a smoky mix of grays and white, larger than Dean ever could have thought. They would easily touch the opposite walls of the room if Cas were to extend them all the way, and Dean had no doubt that they were impressive when fully unfurled.
Cas tilted his head in that infuriatingly adorable way of his, his right wing curling slightly around Dean's shoulders, casting a warm sort of fuzz over the hunter's thoughts. It was like being surrounded by an old, worn blanket; and it gave a feeling that you could only get from being loved unconditionally.
"No matter what you think, Dean, you are never alone." Cas said firmly, his voice sure and firm as he held Dean's gaze. "I am always listening, even though you don't think I am. And I'll always come when you call."
Dean snorted faintly. "Can you be sure of that?"
Cas nodded, that rare smile tugging at his lips once more. "I would not say it if I were not sure. You may tell me anything, I will listen."
And somehow, that hole inside Dean's heart shrank a little more, and a warm, feathered presence slipped inside and began to heal.
I do hope that I got their characters right, at least somewhat. Cas is fairly easy for me to write, but Dean is a little out of my reach... please review, and I hope that you enjoyed!
