Clara's Journal: Day one for twelve

Travelling with the Doctor has taught me one thing about the universe. When you look at it, all that seems to be there is the endless night, dotted with stars of a distant universe. But when you look a bit closer, everything changes. Today was the day when I looked a bit closer at the Doctor and everything changed. No, I mean everything, his eyes (ooh the eyes, what's with them?), the hair (I miss the quiff), and the accent-there's something really weird going on there. He could've picked any accent and he chose Scottish. Still, it gives me a challenge, trying to understand what the heck he's saying. Mind you, he could've been Welsh, and that would've been a whole oth-oh, I'm going off topic! Where was I? Oh yes, change. We're on the TARDIS, and there he is, massive chin, the bow tie (I may be crying a bit at this point) and then he just seems to sneeze, and then he's a fifty-something with scary eyes, and then we start crashing. After that, things entail like this:

'Ok, so we're crashing. You pulled a lever, and then, we're crashing. What sort of machine has a crash lever?' (This is me)

'Ooh, a little feisty are we? Well, I'll have you know, no-one speaks about my TARDIS like that! Who are you to talk like that-actually, just exactly who are you? Is it, Martha? No, that was Ten-Sarah-Jane? No, bless the girl, such a talent. No, you (pointing at me) are…um…'

'CLARA! How could you possibly forget? You always go on and on about the Impossible Girl, ME!'

'Um, no. Anyway, whoever you are, Clarence, I've having a few complications right now, and I could really do with some co-operation. See those clicky things? Tap those a few times. (whilst I'm clicking) Very good, now crank the clonky lever over there. Ok, now if I can still remember, if we can disrupt the power to the Spatial Geometer, uh, that one there (Pointing to lever), we should be able to disrupt our space flight, and let's give the DITO a great big whack (don't ask, I have no idea).'

I'll just stop there for a second. Right, the TARDIS makes a funny noise, and apparently we're now suspended in an instant of time, safe from danger, so we can 'have a nice chat'.

(Twelve) 'Well I have to say, not bad for a rookie. Perhaps you could come travelling with me some time.'

'Oh, you cannot be serious. I've been travelling with you for ages! How could you possibly forget me?'

'Hang on, let me jog the Voice Interface. (To TARDIS) show me information on Catherine-'

'Clara Oswald!'

'Yes, her.'

And, guess what? Up I pop, in full hologram splendour. And then…

'No, she's far better looking'

'Ok, that is it.'

Umm, I sort of slapped him cold at this point. Anyway, he woke up, did a sort of jig, and then he starts crying out in pain. This doesn't get any better.

(Twelve)'AARRGH! Caroline-no wait, of course not, you're Clara, The Impossible Girl, the one I-anyway, you don't need to know that. Yes Clara, Medicine room, NOW!'

'Where? And for what?'

'Quadrant B, past the room of staircases, and it's on your right. There's a huge jar labelled 'ZERO biotic-use carefully', bring that here, quickly!'

Well, off I go, and, I'll leave the journey for another log, but eventually I find my way to the console room with the jar.

(Twelve) 'You took your time! Now, I haven't used this one since I put it into tablet form. You see, these tablets contain the healing qualities of my now-defunct Zero Room, my rest and rehab after a tricky change. I've lost a few rooms in the past, and when the Zero Room began to pass, the TARDIS obtained what I needed from it, and then I did some incredibly clever things to get those tablets you hold in your hand! Yes, so because they are un-trialled, I may experience some issues.'

So there I am, watching him take the whole bottle and throwing the contents down his throat, and then, well, how do I put this-there was a rather bright flash, a big bang and lots of TARDISy whirring, and then he's gone. And just to top it all off, the TARDIS starts to glow a deep red, and a loud bell starts ringing. Searching the data records for the funny Scot, he seemed to had relocated to an inaccessible area of the TARDIS to settle down and recuperate, and it also showed a message for me. It read 'CLARA, MY FUTURE IS IN YOUR HANDS. I NEED YOU TO PILOT THE TARDIS SOMEWHERE SAFE, THE DITO IS BEGINNING TO FOLD THIS INSTANT OF TIME IN ON ITSELF. I AM COUNTING ON YOU CLARA, YOU'RE MY ONLY HOPE.'

I know what you're thinking, pretty scary, eh? Thankfully 'The Old Girl' was very understanding. She dropped the DITO, restored the Spatial Geometer and then it was a bumpy ride from then, sparks and crashes and plenty of whirring noises, and now we're on, well, it appears to be Earth, Victorian times? The Doctor has some friends in this time-hopefully I can find them to help me. But until then, I'm stuck on my own in the TARDIS. Now, where's the kitchen?