Tomorrow was the day, it was the first day of school and oh how i dreaded it. It wasnt the stinky yellow bus, it wasnt the nasty cafeteria food, it was the fact that i didnt belong. I was a senior at Forks High School. I was 17 and i had never been kissed. I didnt belong anywhere in this world.

I have never had it easy. I was raised on a policemans salary, until my father got kicked out of the force. And now we live on just what my mother makes down at the grocery store. Not that i see much of her. My father spent most of his time on the couch, drinking his favorite kind of beer. I tried to hide from him as often as i could. My family and i never see eye to eye.

I had always been different. I wasnt like the other girls my age. I never was all gushy over the boys. I preferred to read instead of party. I was a little socially awkward, but i was nice when you got to know me. Though no one ever did.

I have lived in Forks, Washington my whole life. It used to be a wonderful place. All green and soft from the constant rains. Now it was my own personal nightmare. When i was a child i think i was happy. I had toys and some of the kids let me play with them. But that all changes when you grow up. People expect different things from you when your older.

My family was happy too. My mom and dad were madly in love. I was proud of the amazing work at the station he did. I thought his cruiser lights were fascinating as i grew up. But all good things come to an end. My father messed up on a case and they fired him. It didnt matter that he had twenty years on the force, they sent him packing.

After that it only got worse. My father started drinking heavily, my mother avoided him. In doing so, she started to avoid me too. I wondered all the time why my mother didnt just pack up and leave. She was a beautiful woman and she could make her life elsewhere. My father and i were without any hope, or so i thought.

Life went on. I started to grow up, started to learn what growing up even means. I always tried to be nice and polite but that never got me anywhere. The other kids were mean, they resented the way i acted. They wanted someone just like them, cruel. I couldnt be that way. So i ended up with barely any friends. It only got worse from there.

Because theres a living nightmare, and its called High School. I think that High School should just not exist at all. I couldnt imagine a place more evil and twisted. All the girls were nothing but snakes. It was almost like a zoo. You had the jocks who were nothing but souped up gorillas. The teachers were scared zebras. And here i was, a bunny rabbit in the very middle. I didnt fit in, if you hadnt noticed.

I tried my best. Bought designer clothes with the money i earned over the summer. Dyed and cut my hair to match the celebrities on tv. Nothing ever seemed to work. Maybe it had something to do with my weight. I'v always been a heavy kid. Due to most of my meals being processed foods and not having anyone to play with didnt really help. I also was from a poor family. People didnt want to be friends with a poor kid. I didnt have a fancy pool or a brand new car on my 16th birthday. I was normal. I was average. Or so i thought.

I tried my hardest to fit in, but after awhile i realized it was pointless. Nothing i did ever seemed to matter. While other girls my age were at the mall buying shoes, i was sitting at home watching the television. I didnt get any calls, receive no mail, i was literally and utterly alone.

But i dreamed. I dreamed of bigger and better things. I dreamed of being accepted and wanted. I hoped that one day i would fit in. That boys would notice me and that i would have a place in Forks. I hoped that with all my heart.

It was a new year and that opened up many new possibilities. Forks High School was small but there were bound to be some new faces. There were bound to be somebody there that would like a new friend. I was not weird or anything, it just seemed like nobody liked me. But this was a new year, it could mean a new beginning.

This was my last year before i moved away. I had my eyes on a writing program up in Tucson. That was what i had planned to do for a long time. I got good enough grades but the money was going to be a problem. My father wouldnt give me a dime to go to some dorky writing school. He said i needed to focus on something worthwhile. I didnt say a word back and just went to my room.

Nobody believed in me. Nobody believed that i could be much more than what i was. I was Bella Swan, i was someone special. Even if it was only to myself. I pulled my pants up and dealt with everything the best i could. I was a strong girl. I didnt know where i got it from because it certainly wasnt my father.

I was sitting in my room looking out my window. I could see the trees glowing from the backyard. I ran my fingers through my hair in exasperation. I was nervous. I had everything laid out for tomorrow. I had my book bag and everything i would need. Alls i needed now was my courage.

I hated the first day. All the kids who knew each other were friendly and sociable. I just walked around by myself. All the people would know where to go and who to go to. I would just be wandering around like a lost puppy. I wish i was just a new student than i would have an excuse. New students were not expected to know anyone. I had lived here all my life and barely knew anyone.

I wished i was different. But nothing can change who we are. I would just have to do the best i could do. I heard my father call my name. I jumped off the bed and went to see what he wanted. He was sitting in the living room. A beer already in his hand.

"What are you making for supper?" he demanded. I guessed correctly that my mother wasnt back yet. She was hardly ever around.

"I can make spaghetti?" i asked, he didnt say a word. He just turned his attention back to the tv. I took that as he was okay with spaghetti. I put a pot on to boil and tried to keep my mind occupied. When the food was done i made him a plate and took it to him. He took it from me without a thanks. I didnt need one anyway.

I made myself a plate and ate silently. We never had family dinners like normal people. My mother was never around. My father was always drunk by 7 o'clock. I was the only one in this family who was normal. But to everyone else, i wasnt.

I put my plate in the sink and went upstairs. I was going to get in an early night. I wanted to be up early for tomorrow. I needed to think of a new strategy. I would find the first new kid i seen and just go up and introduce myself. I could show them around and become friends. That way i wouldnt be so lonely anymore.

All i wanted was just one friend. Not a talk for hours kinda friend, more a school friend. Someone who could sit with me at lunch and just talk about homework. I doubted anyone would want to come over to my house. I doubted anyone would want to meet my family. I just needed someone to help escape this house.

I could go over to there house and spend the day in a normal household. I could spend the night and we could share stories. I could open up and tell them my dreams and they do the same. I wanted a best friend more than anything. Someone who was there for me when i was down. I hadnt had someone like that ever in my life.

I got into my jammies and hopped into bed. I was not looking forward to this day but i had to do it. If i ever wanted to be an editor, this was my last year before i could. I had to make it through this. It couldnt be all bad. Last year was a bust, and the year before that. But things have to change sometime, right? I hoped so.

I closed my eyes and tried to drift off into sleep. My restless thoughts kept bouncing around in my head. I didnt want to change myself for anyone but thoughts always came into my head. Maybe if i was funny people would like me. Maybe if i had money, people would like me. Maybe if i was thin and beautiful, people would like me. But isnt that wrong? Werent people supposed to like you for who you truly were? Rather than something superficial like your looks and clothes?

I finally managed to drift off into sleep. Never knowing that tomorrow i would meet the definition of vain. That i would meet someone who had it all, looks, money, you name it. This boy went by the name Edward Cullen. Edward was everything that i despised. But that was after i was struck by his beautiful face. Edward Cullen was the definition of hot. Edward Cullen was the new kid.