(Disclaimer: I own my character, AvistA. Zorak however is not mine. He belongs to Cartoon Network or something XD)
To see the poster I drew for this fanfic go here: silvolf.deviant art. com/art/Road-Trip-85348366 (remove spaces)
Road Trip
They'd set out that morning intending to just go for a drive for the day. Zorak's truck was speeding down the highway, mostly at speeds that were considered illegal in most areas. The pickup was covered in dents from the amount of...things he'd hit in the time he'd owned the truck, whether it was mailboxes for fun, peoples' pets for fun or pedestrians...for fun. He just liked hitting stuff. Any stuff, preferably stuff that made an interesting crunch noise on impact. The truck was green, it would have looked real nice if only it hadn't been covered in dents and sported an oversized rear spoiler because at the time he'd thought it would look cool. Now it was just scruffy. He didn't give a damn though and threatened to punch anyone who did. He loved his truck. It had a storage trunk on the back for putting bodies in.
AvistA sat next to him, gazing out the window. She had no idea where he was going and didn't care either. She just loved road trips. She loved the wind in her mane and the sound of the CD player blaring thrash metal. Zorak had a convertible too, it was a neat car, in pearl green but he rarely drove it. That one he just used to show off with and he'd bought it with the money he'd had left over from doing The Brak Show. He still had a lot of money...mostly cos he nicked it. He had a lot of money in fact, enough to buy a new truck but as I mentioned before, he loved his old green pickup truck.
Zorak screeched in a black metal voice; that was his speciality given the scratchiness of his vocal chords. It went well with the music, which was currently Metallica. AvistA's ears flattened and she grimaced. She loved his singing but Zorak screeching at such close quarters was particularly unpleasant. It tore through her ear drums like a rusty knife. He was oblivious. As usual.
They passed a gas station and he pulled in.
"Runnin' low babe...gotta refuel" growled Zorak and turned off the engine, hopping out. AvistA rested her head on her hand and gazed at the sky. It was bright and sunny and boiling hot. She'd bought some water along just in case. Zorak usually kept beverages in the back. A keg of beer was usually in there. Right now it was empty. He needed a keg, since it took him ages to get drunk. Because his body was more tolerant than most others, it took a lot of alcohol to get him drunk. An awful lot. Of course, after drinking so much he'd be constantly needing to take a piss. He never cared where he pissed. Cept on his truck. Never on his truck. His truck which he'd lovingly crashed about 13 times in the time he'd owned it. His trucks never lasted long. This one he'd had for just over a year, which was a good age. He usually smashed them up driving into walls, pits or shopping malls way before then.
AvistA took a swig of her water. Zorak got back in and started the engine. He wasn't paying for the gas. As usual. They sped off down the road. Zorak didn't have a license and his truck wasn't registered. It always amazed AvistA how he managed to stay out of the way of the law even though he was constantly violating it. He was savvy with the laws of the universe though, being on earth over 14 years he'd had plenty of time to find every loophole and put them all into practise. Especially where firearms were concerned, although his weapon of choice was his Matter Intensifier. He kept that with him most of the time and had it now in the back of the truck. It was a space laser gun he'd smuggled to earth after being held in the Omegan Prison when Space Ghost had bought him and Moltar to help him with his talk show as part of their probation, along with Zorak's band The Original Way Outs. It had always been his weapon of choice and he'd purchased it back on his home planet of Dokar just before he went out with a convoy of war ships and henchmen to conquer the galaxy. Matter Intensifiers were made only on Dokar and he valued his immensely since if he lost it, he wouldn't be able to get another. It had unlimited ammo and could fire through solid surfaces without breaking them, great for sniping through walls, windows and such. He was merciless with it and enjoyed toying with his victims.
He was experienced with most firearms though.
The music was still blaring, the windows all the way down and Zorak was still singing along, one elbow resting on the window sill and the other hand on the wheel, driving casually as they moved out onto the highway. AvistA knew what was coming next. Racing! Zorak always drove in the fastest lane, overtaking as many others as he could. He did his trademark evil laugh and was lost to the world, looking for someone who dared race him (which was unwise since he usually caused the other person to crash or veer off into the curb somehow). AvistA merely rolled her eyes, used to her boyfriend's "hobbies" and always eager to go along for the ride too. She knew she was safe so long as she was inside the truck, with Zorak and not in another person's car with them.
He found a victim. Sports car driver. They were always schmoes for racing. They could never resist showing off their speed. And against a truck? Well that's a breeze, right? Heheh, wrong.
"Hey you, the loser in the red Porsche!" yelled Zorak out the window at the guy in the other car.
"Who you callin' a loser? Especially in a hunk of crap like that!" the Porsche guy yelled back.
"Wanna race?" Zorak smirked, his voice oozing with pent up excitement and glee.
"Ha!! You gotta be kidding! In that pile of shit? Are you crazy?"
"You'd be crazy not to race me"
"Wait...what?? What the hell? Fine man, you're on!" The Porsche guy sped up.
"HAHA!! SUCKER!!" screeched Zorak and sped up too. He was lagging pretty badly at first and AvistA knew he was giving the other guy a chance. A chance to be shown up really badly that is. Zorak had installed boosters to the bottom of the truck. He did this with all his vehicles. Basically for the simple reason that the faster you went, the less likely the cops were to chase you. You went too fast for speed cameras to pick you up easily and by the time the cops realised that streak of blur that just passed them was a car, you'd be long gone and they'd never catch up so there was no point giving chase. Oh, and it was also good for beating people in a race.
The Porsche guy was laughing...till he saw Zorak's truck fly past, the roar of the boosters making the roar of his sport car sound like a squeak.
"What the fu..." was all he had time to say before the truck was lost in the traffic ahead.
Zorak laughed. "Ah, it never gets old heheh. I love makin' people feel inadequate" he glanced at AvistA. "Hey babe, yer pretty quiet, you awright?"
"Yeah I'm good. Just enjoying the ride" she grinned.
"Heheh ya know I love makin' these trips entertaining!"
AvistA smirked. "Oh it's always that, Sex Muffin, always that."
Zorak's eye twitched and his antennae flicked. This was him cringing at her using his pet name in public...as in outside the bedroom. He had a rep to keep and even though of course no one could hear her calling him that since they were speeding down the highway in a green pickup truck at 80 miles an hour, he still mentally groaned.
AvistA noticed and grinned. She knew how he felt about it and liked to try her luck with teasing. He hated being teased but he tolerated it if it was done only occasionally. And by her. And he always gave away how he felt with small antennae movements. She knew what they were since she had been with him a few years but others wouldn't even notice except maybe he had itchy antennaes or something. Right now he was staring straight ahead out the window, concentrating on driving for once. He was wearing some kind of pearlescent purple sleeveless shirt and jeans. The shirt was open at the front, showing off his chest and the segments of exoskeleton down his front. Breaking the Law by Judas Priest was now blaring out the CD player and they both started singing at the top of their voices to it, Zorak swerving the truck around in time to the music and causing all the other poor drivers around them to beep their horns in agitation and annoyance.
"Wooo yeah!" yelled Zorak, donning his shades and laughing.
AvistA still had no idea where he was taking her.
They carried on down the highway and turned down a small and dusty road. AvistA leaned her arm on her window and took another swig of water. Zorak was no longer singing.
"We'll get there soon" he suddenly said.
"Get where?" she looked at him, one ear down in puzzlement.
"To where it crashed."
"Where what crashed?"
"You'll see"
She sat in silence. What could have crashed? Oh man...a ship! Zorak had been looking for a way off the planet for years. Well ever since his Brak Show job had finished and he was a free mantis. He wanted to get off Earth and back to ruling the universe...or something like that. He'd planned to either hitchhike or find a crashed ship and repair it, take her with him and return to Dokar to recruit more soldiers. She'd always been scared the other Dokarians would devour her but he assured her that they wouldn't, because if they so much as tried, he'd tear their beaks off. She saw the eagerness in his eyes as he drove now, the excitement boiling up inside him. His antennaes flicked and twitched with anticipation. They hadn't found a crashed ship before. His phone must have picked it up. He had a device in his cell phone that allowed him to pick up space craft flying nearby and contact them and also pick up any that landed in the outlying area. Sadly none had flown near enough to contact. They'd talked often about what they would do if they contacted one and it answered and picked them up. Most likely they'd hitch a lift to the nearest transportation planet and pick up a cheap ship for the rest of the journey. Or, and this was Zorak's idea of course, hijack the ship that picked them up, kill the crew and fly home in that. And the bigger and more advanced the ship, the better. However two of them against the whole crew and they wouldn't have much of a chance even with Zorak's regeneration abilities.
AvistA spoke up. "So uh, where is it? How far away?"
"Are we nearly there yet?" Zorak whined in a moany childlike voice. "Zat what you were gonna say?"
AvistA sniggered. "Oh yeah...cos I really need the bathroom!"
"Yeah? Well piss in a bush."
AvistA looked out. "There aren't any, we appear to be in the...desert?"
"Bingo! The ship crashed out here, I picked it up on the scanner this morning." Zorak's voice was full of excitement. No longer would he be stuck on a ball of dirt planet he liked to call "The Ball of Dirt"
AvistA looked out over the rolling sandy plains that stretched for miles, marked only here and there with cacti and the odd lizard. She suddenly giggled and started to sing "We're on the road to nowhere!"
This was met by a glare from Zorak. "Ehh, I know where I'm goin' ya know."
"I know I know...I just like that song, its fun to sing." AvistA sweatdropped and grinned sheepishly.
Zorak merely rolled his eyes, grumbled and carried on driving.
AvistA rifled around in the glove compartment and found a chocolate bar. "Hey hun, want some of this?"
Zorak's head spun round so fast she heard his neck click. "Oh babe I...oh...uh, no. I'm not hungry fer that kinda thing right now"
AvistA rolled her eyes and grinned, all too obvious the fact that he thought she was offering something much naughtier than a mere chocolate bar. His eagerness made her mentally smile, she loved that he was crazy for her. Crazy in that obsessive, sex crazed, violent Zorak way of his. She also wondered why his neck didn't hurt right now. She guessed the regeneration had kicked in. It was hard constantly having to remember he could regenerate. Like when he picked fights, she stressed when he got badly hurt but in a few moments he was better and tearing into his opponent. He could be killed though, if one knew the right way of doing it. Hence why females of his species devoured the males heads. If the part of the brain that controlled regeneration was destroyed, Zorak was dead. For good. And AvistA feared that day, she feared one day his habit of picking fights would make him pick the wrong fight and get himself killed.
They carried on driving. Turbo Lover by Judas Priest came on and AvistA sang it to him. Zorak loved it when she sang; her voice was like heaven to him. She was a great singer. What was even better was when she sang songs that they were both fond of. The words of Turbo Lover for instance, reminded her of how Zorak was like with her. Usually he sang it though. It was more the kind of song that fitted him singing to her as opposed to the other way round.
After some driving later, she started to wonder how much longer it would be. She could see he was getting agitated too. He murmured under his breath in Dokarian. Most likely curse words.
"Do you know exactly where it crashed?" she asked.
"Not exactly. It's so far out, the co-ordinates aren't precise. I only know the approximate location."
"And where's that?"
"Round here somewhere"
"Oh"
"Aww come on it's a massive ass mother fucker of a ship, it aint gonna be hard to spot. The scanner said it was big. It hasn't been found by anyone cos it's so far out."
"What if it's away from the road?"
"You can SEE it from the road!" She could see he was getting aggravated now.
"Err, what if it's further out then?" she asked.
He nodded. "I'm thinkin' so."
AvistA sat back and took a deep breath, gazing at the road ahead. It was hazy from the heat and she flicked on the AC. Zorak was no longer laid back, cruising mode, he was half hunched over the wheel, getting frustrated at not finding the ship anywhere near. His large eyes gazed out and scanned around constantly, searching for anything ship shaped lying in the sand.
A half hour later and still nothing. Zorak's good mood had completely vanished. He was in the usual grumpy mood he was commonly seen in when he was on Space Ghost Coast to Coast.
"Where the frak is it??" he snarled, glaring out the window and seething. "The fucking scanner said it was out here!"
"Hmm, well I suggest we stop for a bite to eat" AvistA pointed to a roadside cafe. "There won't be another one of those for miles, we should have a break or you're gunna go postal on the truck"
"I was thinkin' more of offroading"
"This isn't your SUV, I don't think the truck could handle offroading." This last remark was met by a glare from Zorak that could melt the face off stone. He had had an SUV. He'd driven it off a cliff by accident.
"Awright awright, we'll stop. Geez, ya ever not thinkin' about that belly of yours?" Zorak pulled in to the car park by the little cafe.
AvistA, being a Demidragon, had a huge appetite and a fast metabolism, one she was very proud of. She felt hungry a lot.
They parked up and got out, heading into the cafe. Zorak's 7 feet of height was imposing and although he normally slouched, when in a strange place, he displayed his dominance by standing tall. His antennaes curved over in a threatening manner too.
They walked up to the counter. The woman behind resembled the desert; scruffy and dusty.
"What'll it be?" she asked.
AvistA looked at the menu while Zorak ordered his.
"Two large burgers and a sub" he paused for thought "And a large root beer" The woman behind the counter nodded and waited for AvistA.
"Can I have a sausage sandwich and a strawberry milkshake please?" The woman nodded and gave them a table number. They went and sat down to wait for the food.
Zorak got his cell phone out and fiddled about with it grumbling to himself.
"Can you find the ship?" asked AvistA.
"Yes, it says its right here! So where the hell is it?" replied a disgruntled Zorak lighting a cigarette in his annoyance and taking a long drag. AvistA sighed and thought he'd better not smash that phone in his anger. He was known for doing things like that.
"We'll find it, don't worry" AvistA ventured, smiling.
Zorak merely frowned and the food arrived.
"Hey, check the sign, no smoking mister!" the woman glared at Zorak.
"Bite me" was his only reply and he ignored her.
"Put it out, now."
Zorak turned his head towards her, glared her straight in the eyes and said slowly "ya wanna make me?"
The woman just sighed and walked off, there were other customers to serve and she didn't have time to argue.
"Geez, I don't light up often and they don't normally make a fuss about it" grumbled Zorak. Had to be today. AvistA just shrugged and tucked into her sandwich.
Zorak finished his cig before he started on his sub. The whole time, his fingers were busily pressing the buttons on the phone as he confirmed the co-ordinates over and over.
"Hey, just chill. We'll find it, no probs" said AvistA, taking a long drink of her shake thirstily.
"Yeah, yer right. It's nearby, it aint that far out. But I just hate drivin' round in circles. Its fuckin' stressful." He put the phone down on the table, sat back, stretched out his legs, sighed and relaxed enough to eat his food properly. AvistA had nearly finished her sandwich, she added some more ketchup to it and sat back too. Their legs touched under the table and Zorak ran one long toe down AvistA's leg. She mentally grinned and her tail slid up his thigh. Then she noticed he was looking at her. She winked at him and saw an antennae flick and he cocked an eyebrow at her.
"Heheheh" she chuckled and finished her sub. He was on his second burger. He was a fast eater with a large appetite and he swigged his root beer. He ate and drank pretty much anything. This included raw meat, toner fluid and industrial strength cleaner. He told her it helped get the crap out of his internal system.
Soon they were both finished and he glanced at the counter, seeing if he could work out a way to sneak out.
"Hey, I'd better use the bathroom before we leave" AvistA said. Zorak nodded. He never used the bathroom anyway. He waited for her to return, still keeping an eye on the counter. The woman was busy. It was only a small roadside cafe and only she and a waitress were working.
Soon AvistA returned, refreshed and ready to go. She saw Zorak's eyes flick at the door. The woman hadn't seen her return from the bathroom and she left the cafe, soon followed by him. The woman never asked where Zorak was off to; she assumed AvistA would pay when she got back from the bathroom. No chance.
When Zorak got outside, he found AvistA looking bewildered.
"Um...where's the truck?"
"Huh? What the frak?? Where the fuck is MY FUCKIN' TRUCK??" screeched Zorak, looking around the car park. His wings sprang out in anger and he snarled as he looked around.
"Ok, this had better be a fuckin' trick, cos if it's not..." he was pretty much seething now.
"Some bastard's hotwired it and nicked it!" growled AvistA. She was pissed now. No one stole from either of them and remained in her good books. All that was in the car park was an old coupe, a small car of uncertain branding, a RV and a Ford.
"Yer right. Zorak's mad as hell now and some bastard's gonna get it big time." Snarled Zorak
"So what do we do? Hotwire one of these and go after the thief?"
"You read my mind. We'll take the RV, c'mon"
They went over to the RV and AvistA stood watch while Zorak broke in. Luckily it was parked a fair way away from the cafe, most likely so it didn't get in the way of the other cars. It was also parked in the shade, it seemed like the owner made a point of being sure it wasn't in the sun. The door Zorak was working on swung open and he got in, unlocking AvistA's door.
She looked around while he worked the wires. It was a nice sized vehicle. It had a little sink, walk in shower, toilet and a large bed at the back. There was a funny smell about the place but AvistA ignored it. Someone may have left some meat in the fridge that had gone off.
She heard Zorak grumbling and the RV sprang into life.
"Awright! We got powerrr!!" Zorak pulled out of the car park while AvistA put her seatbelt on. He never bothered with a seatbelt.
They sped down the road.
"So, uh...how the hell are we gunna find the truck? We dunno which way the thief went."
"Oh we'll find it. My gun is in the back of it. It's got a tracking device on. It's useful to track weaponry ya know. That's why I'm so pissed over this, the fucker's got my gun!" Zorak's gun was his most valued possession.
AvistA growled low and her tail twitched angrily. "When we find him, can I hurt him? Preferably in some horrible torturous way that will demand some thinking about?"
Zorak chuckled. "Sure, go fer it. I like ta see you kick butt. One thing though, I get his head...and the bones afterwards. I haven't made a bone stew for a long while."
"Yeah sure. So, are we headed in the right direction for the truck now?" asked AvistA. When they started off, Zorak had seemed confused with his bearings.
"Yep, it's this way. Man I hate drivin' something so slow. We shoulda taken that Ford." Murmured Zorak.
"Yeah but this is heavy too, just think of all the stuff we can run over! It might make a better sound when we crush it you know..." AvistA attempted to cheer him and lighten his mood.
Zorak glanced at her and smirked. "Heheh you always know how ta get me goin' babe"
"That's what I'm here for! Well, that and the sex" AvistA laughed. Zorak laughed too. For that brief moment they forgot the truck, the Matter Intensifier and the thief and laughed.
Then a car flew past, beeping at them. Zorak had forgotten this vehicle was bigger than his usual one and was driving too far near the middle of the road, upsetting the cars on the other side. Actually, he could just have been doing it to piss them off and knew fully well, only he knows for sure.
AvistA rifled through the glove box, looking for any CDs. They were missing their music.
"Found any?" asked Zorak.
"No...well, only crap ones. Oh, wait...they have Tenacious D!"
"That'll do, ram it in."
AvistA sniggered and inserted the CD. Soon they were singing again.
"This is not the greatest song in the world!! This is just a tribute!!" they sang in unison a while later when Tribute came on.
A while later and it had gotten to what they were going to do when they got the truck back.
"I'm gunna ram my Matter Intensifier down his throat and fire! He'll explode then heheh" murmured Zorak with considerable glee.
"Aww, can't we hang him upside down for a half hour till the blood rushes to his head and then shoot his head and see if it explodes? I've wanted to try that for ages." AvistA moaned.
"Well...where would ya hang him out here? There aint no trees around, only cacti"
AvistA suddenly grinned. "Hmm...how about cacti related torture?"
"I'm listenin'" replied Zorak.
" Well we could tie him to a really prickly one and then kick him or shove him so the spines stick into him"
"Na, that's not evil enough. I reckon we should find a small cactus and make him eat it. A really prickly one with poison tipped spines or something."
"No, no, I got it!! We tie him to a cactus, make him eat one, then hang him upside down for a half hour and shove the gun in his mouth, point it upwards towards his neck and shoot him."
"It amazes me how you managed to combine all of those"
AvistA laughed. "Guess I just got the imagination for it"
"Or you watch too many horror movies. Hey look a lizard!" The last part of Zorak's sentence was followed by a bump, crunch and squeak as the lizard passed under the tires of the RV.
"2 POINTS!" yelled Zorak.
"Only 2?"
"It was a small lizard"
They carried on for a while, running over the odd bit of wildlife and singing to the CD which they'd put on repeat.
"Ya know, I can do cock pushups" remarked Zorak just after the dialogue track with Jack and Kyle talking about the latter.
"Really?"
"Yeah, and I can do more than one" Zorak looked proud of himself.
"Heheh well its easier when your cock is telescopic" replied AvistA with a smirk.
"True, guess I cheat then heheh"
"As with most things"
"As with EVERYTHING! When have I ever played fair? Come on babe, where's the fun in that?"
AvistA laughed. Zorak was a liar, cheater, stealer, murderer and sadistic but he was her guy and she loved him nonetheless.
It was starting to get dark.
"Why haven't they stopped the truck fer the night? The signal's still moving" Zorak said as the sun set.
"Maybe they will soon" suggested AvistA. But they didn't. The truck was still moving. They carried on in silence. The CD had stopped a while ago after its third repeat and they'd gotten tired of the same songs over and over.
AvistA yawned. "Just a suggestion but maybe we should pull in. You're gunna be shattered if you carry on driving all night. The signal appears to have stopped now but let's catch up in the morning."
Zorak agreed with a sigh. "Yeah, yer right." He pulled in the RV and turned off the engine. They were bathed in pitch black darkness. AvistA found a light cord and pulled it. A tube light in the ceiling came on.
"So, let's see if they've got any food back here!" grinned AvistA.
"Again with the food...honestly" Zorak shook his head and mock sighed. AvistA just laughed and had a look round. Zorak joined her although he hated having to duck down so low.
"Why don't they make these things in my size?" he grumbled.
"Cos they don't make anything in your size...you're big...everywhere..." she trailed off as he stepped up to her and nuzzled her briefly.
"Hell yeah I am" he smirked. She laid her ears back and murred at him in a flirty way. Zorak chuckled and kissed her slowly. He pulled away after and growled in her ear.
"Imagine this, we're all alone out here...in the wilderness. I wonder what we'll get up to heheheheh..."
AvistA's tail wagged excitedly. "Oooh I'm sure I'll find out!"
"Oh, you will...you will...but first let's see what we can find ta eat. I'm pretty hungry."
AvistA moved up against him growling. "How about eating me?"
"Oh I save the best till last..." Zorak trailed his long fingers down her body as he spoke, ending with a small teasing grope between her legs. She nearly melted.
"Ooh Zorak! Why wait?"
"Heheh, to keep you eager. Plus I'm just mean like that. Hey look I found some potato chips!"
They foraged around looking and found quite a bit of food, which included cans. AvistA looked for the can opener and opened a cupboard high up.
"Hey Zorak!! I found a shotgun!" she yelled excitedly.
He came up beside her and had a look. "Hmm, that'll do nicely fer takin' out my truck."
"Taking it out? Err, don't you just wanna take out the guy?"
"I gotta shoot out one of the tires to slow it down. I gotta spare in the back of it anyway but with those boosters it'll easily outrun us in this crap pile. So if I take out a tire, it'll slow it down enough fer me to fly out and catch up" explained Zorak.
"Ah I get it! Well save some of the guy for me when you managed to wrestle the truck off him!"
"Oh I will, don't you worry about that. Then we can hang him upside down from a cactus and shoot him in the head."
AvistA giggled and tucked into some more of the food they found. Soon they'd eaten their fill and they settled down on the bed. Zorak sat on the edge of it taking his boots off as AvistA sidled up behind him and put her arms around him. She kissed his cheek and he blinked loudly as he turned his head to look at her. He soon had her clothes off as well as his own and she lay on her back with him leaning over her, gazing into her eyes. He nuzzled her neck up and down and licked her soft fur, ending with a hot passionate kiss. Their tongues wrestled and their hands groped, eyes closed, their growls mixing together. Finally Zorak drew back and smirked.
"So, what about my little "dessert" treat?" His eyes wandered down to her crotch and he licked his beak. AvistA spread out, invitingly and grinned, her tail flicking to and fro. Zorak moved down her body lower and lower and she was soon moaning in pleasure.
A while later the RV was rocking, accompanied by carnal screeches and groans, long into the night.
The sunlight shone in full blast on the sleeping AvistA the following morning. She snarled a little and rolled over into a less blinded by the sun position and nuzzled her head under Zorak's arm. He stirred a little and stroked her head in his sleep. He was on his back, beak open, drooling a little and his antennaes twitched. He was most likely in the middle of some violent dream. AvistA sleepily took possession of his hand and placed it over her face. It was bigger than her hands and served as better shade. Her hand was rested on Zorak's chest and the other had found an antenna to grip. They lay like this for a while until Zorak jolted in his sleep and grabbed her face, causing her to squeal and shove his hand off. Now she was awake. She gazed at him and yanked his antenna to get him back for grabbing her face. He merely grumbled in his sleep and the antenna in question spazzed and twitched violently in protest, asking to be let go.
AvistA got her bearings slowly and rested her head on Zorak's chest, snuggling up to him. She wrapped her tail round him and one of his long tri-digit toes twitched. He was now sniggering in his sleep and mumbling in his native language. He usually talked in Dokarian when he was asleep. She rubbed her leg against his and he returned the affection by groping her chest unceremoniously.
AvistA took a deep breath as she sighed, then stopped. She could smell something. Something odd and not right. She sniffed the air and screwed her nose at it. Something smelled...dead. She recalled she'd smelled it a bit the previous day but paid no attention to it. Now it was worse. She made to get up but Zorak's arm was around her possessively and he wouldn't let go.
"Hey, Sex Muffin?"
"Hmmhhmmmeerrrmmm what is it...Sweetcake..."
"I can smell something odd, I'm gunna check it out, ok?"
Zorak opened one eye very slightly. "S'probably only me, ya tend to have that effect on me babe..."
AvistA shook her head "No it's not your pheromones, this smell isn't chemically, its dead. It smells of death"
Zorak's antennaes moved around. He was smelling and sensing now. "Yeah yer right, it does smell like somethin' died in here."
AvistA pulled on her t-shirt and jeans, neglecting her underwear for now. "I'll go check it out"
"S'probably only one of those things we hit yesterday..." Zorak wasn't properly awake yet.
"I smelled it before we hit those. I'll be back in a minute. It was coming from the compartment at the back of the RV" AvistA went out and round to the back of the vehicle, popping open the door to the trunk or storage place. The smell hit her full on, ten times worse. She held her nose and grimaced. Peering in, she saw a whole bunch of black plastic. Three body shaped things. Her eyes widened and she slit one with a claw. A dead white face with sightless eyes gazed back at her. A few maggots squirmed from one of the cheeks. AvistA slammed the door shut and rushed back inside, diving on the bed next to Zorak who had been drifting off to sleep again until the impact of her landing woke him completely up.
"Hey, what's up, you look like you saw a ghost or somethin'" he said sleepily, yawning and sitting up. His antennaes drooped down behind his head.
"I...I...oh my God Zorak...I did."
"Yeah right, come on babe, pull the other one" Zorak lifted one long finger and fondled her under the chin. Then he saw she was shivering. "Hey, you awright?"
AvistA suddenly flung herself on him and clung there. Zorak, a little surprised at this just put his arms round her and stroked her mane. He was never any good at comforting and never would be so he just tended to let her calm down in her own time and explain after. He didn't like feeling her soft fur shivering against him though, it unsettled him. He didn't like things that upset her. When something upset her, he tore it apart. His antennaes moved over her head and felt her fear. She wasn't crying, just terrified, she'd never found dead bodies before. It's not scary if you're the one doing the killing, she was used to that since Zorak was always doing that. But she'd never actually found dead bodies before. The smell was the worst thing she'd ever smelled. Zorak's hold comforted her and she slowly calmed down enough to speak.
"There...there are three dead bodies in the back of this RV" she whimpered.
"Really? Cool! So uh...why are you scared? Dead people can't hurt you."
"I know, but it's a shock when you find three in the back of a vehicle you've just stolen...or any vehicle for that matter." AvistA looked up at him, the colour slowly returning to her fuzzy cheeks.
Zorak ran his fingers under her chin and kissed her. "I bet whoever owns this RV was glad to be rid of it if they were gonna ditch the evidence. We'll be doin' them a favour!"
"What are we gunna do with them?" asked AvistA, still clung against him.
"Ya feelin' hungry? Let's eat 'em!" There goes Zorak's freaky gross evil appetite again.
"Err, you can if you want."
"I'll cook 'em for ya! Plus, think of all those bones for my stew. Even you like my bone stew" he spoke with tantalisation in his voice.
AvistA sat on his lap, snuggled up to him. "Skin and gut them then" she replied.
"Or we could buurn 'em hehehheheh" continued Zorak. "How 'bout showin' me a little of that firepower of yours, Sweetcake?" He stroked her cheek. AvistA rested her head on him and smiled a little. "Well, ok." Zorak brightened immediately.
AvistA, being only a Demidragon, couldn't breathe fire without some kind of ignition. So she carried a lighter with her at all times. She often hated being what she was, she was incapable of flight too.
She hopped off his lap and put her underwear on while Zorak watched with immense interest. He got dressed too and they went outside. Luckily where they'd pulled in, it was quiet and no one came past so they could dispose of the bodies easily without being seen. Of course, it would cause a lot of smoke but they planned to set them alight and leave them. Zorak slung one over each shoulder and AvistA dragged the remaining one out into the desert a little way. They set them down and Zorak insisted on getting them out to look at. There were two men and a woman, each in varying states of decay, which suggested they had all been killed at various different times. The stink burned into AvistA's nostrils. If you've ever smelled a dead thing, you'll know that smell stays with you for life. And the bigger the dead thing, the worse the smell.
Zorak piled them up and slung the bags with them.
"Awright babe, do yer stuff!" he said, standing back.
AvistA took out her lighter from her back pocket. It had a purple symbol on and was silver with a gold lid, she flicked the lid back and flicked the lighter on, inhaling the flame. Then she placed it back in her pocket, took a deep breath and blew on the bodies. A large blast of flames engulfed them, setting them alight nicely.
Zorak watched, antennaes wiggling gleefully. "There, now the only smell is the smell of barbecued human! Mmm, smells goooood!" Zorak loved burning human smell. Especially the hair. Burning hair was one of his hobbies, particularly when the hair was still attached.
AvistA felt a bit better and they headed back to the RV.
They got back in and Zorak checked on the location of his truck. "Hmm, seems like it hasn't started moving yet. We might even catch it before it starts up again...but then where's the fun in that? I wanna good chase! Heheh!"
Still, they started out for it again anyway, mostly cos AvistA wanted them to be away from the funeral pyre so they weren't connected to it. She watched the smoke move into the distance as they drove further and further away. They were a mile away from the truck now and Zorak was getting more excited.
"Go check that the shotgun's loaded" he told AvistA and she headed into the RV's "kitchen" to the cupboard with the gun and checked. It had two bullets in it. She made sure the safety was down on it and laid it down on the floor as opposed to putting it back in the cupboard. This way it could be grabbed more easily when the time came to use it. AvistA wasn't much good at aiming except at close quarters so Zorak was the firearms master. She could drive but only cos Zorak had taught her. He didn't make the best driving teacher and most of the stuff she knew was illegal in most states. Such as the speed limits. He'd lied about all of those and she thought there weren't speed limits in most places. When they saw maximum speed signs, he'd told her that was actually the minimum speed required and that she had to be doing above that or she'd get pulled over by the cops. She had suspected him of lying about it but didn't really care. He bought out her rebellious side.
"Ooh it's on the move again, but we've nearly caught up now!" observed Zorak.
"How far are we away from it?" asked AvistA.
"About half a mile" he replied. "Where's the gun?"
"On the floor back there, you want it?"
"Not yet, I'll tell you when I do."
She nodded and stared out the window, expecting to see the truck soon. Sure enough, there it was in the distance, the massive rear spoilers giving it away.
"Awright, I'm gonna drive up nice and easy. You take over when I say and I'll lean out the window and take out one of the back tires. We won't give the guy a chance to think of using the boosters. Then I'll open the door and fly out, catch up to the truck and stop it. When you see it stop, pull in the RV. I'll knock the guy out and bring the truck up to the RV. We'll tow the truck to a more private place and deal with the guy then. You got that?"
AvistA nodded. "Yes! Got it!"
"Awright, let's roll!" yelled Zorak, erupted into a wonderfully evil laugh and motioned for AvistA to give him the gun, which she did. He'd rolled down the window as she was getting the gun and he pressed himself against the door, leaning out with the gun after she gave it to him, keeping flush with the side of the RV and aiming at the back tire of the truck.
The driver had seen him though and started to speed up. Zorak swore and let his lightning reflexes take control. He aimed and fired, skimming the tire badly but still enough to burst it. The truck wobbled and slowed. AvistA had been leaning across Zorak and trying to steer while this was going on. He dropped the gun, opened the door and his wings shot out of their carapace. At the same time he jumped and took flight, catching up to his truck and landing on the top. The driver had his window open and as AvistA pulled the RV into the side of the road (its door swinging dangerously out as she did), she saw Zorak reach an arm in through the guy's window and claw at him, causing him to swerve into the oncoming traffic. Zorak managed to punch the guy and hurt him enough that he lost control of the truck. Zorak leaned down, most of his body through the window and he steered the truck into the side of the road out of the way of the traffic. There weren't many cars on the road but there were enough to cause an accident if the truck swerved into the other lane.
The guy yelled as Zorak pulled himself out of the window, fell off the roof of the truck and opened the door.
"What the fuck are you doing?" yelled the guy.
"Claiming what's mine" replied Zorak, grabbing the guy by the scruff and pulling him out the truck.
"Oh so this heap of junk is yours? I didn't think anyone would care if I stole this, or even notice" remarked the guy, surprisingly bold for someone who was being lifted into the air singlehandedly by a 7 foot tall mantis alien.
"Yeah, well I did notice and I'm takin' it back" remarked Zorak.
"Fine, but can you give me a lift?"
"Sure, I'll give you a lift. To hell! Mwahahahahahaaa!" and with that, Zorak punched him and knocked him out. He slung him in the trunk on the back of the pickup and got in behind the wheel.
"Ah, 's good ta be back!" he sighed and checked the back seat. His Matter Intensifier was still there and he smirked, feeling achievement.
Zorak turned the truck around and took it back to the RV. The flat tire caused it to be slow and unsteady but it made it in the end.
AvistA was outside the RV, leaning against it waiting for him.
She perked up when she saw him arrive and went over when he got out. "You get the bad guy?"
"Heheh, of course!" he gave her a small kiss and dragged the guy out of the trunk. "Let's tie him up and stuff him in the RV's storage where those bodies were. He can suffocate with what's left of that stench while we take him somewhere more...private." Zorak ended with a chuckle and AvistA found some rope in the truck. They tied his hands and feet and shoved him in the storage compartment. Then they attached the truck to the back of the RV and towed it with them, not replacing the tire just yet.
AvistA got back in the RV, followed by Zorak and they debated where to take the guy.
"Well, you wanted to tie him to a cactus, so let's find a big one so we can tie him upside down to it and try that theory of yours heheh."
AvistA grinned with excitement. "Yes! We'll do that!"
So they drove out until they found a large cactus, big enough for a man to be tied to. On the way, AvistA had picked up a small prickly cactus. They were either gunna make the guy eat it or he's face the consequences...it would be shoved down his pants.
Zorak pulled up the RV and they got out. He went to get the guy who was now conscious due to the awful smell he'd been forced to endure.
"Awright then, let the fun begin heheheh" he sniggered, dragging the guy over to the cactus.
"W..what are you gonna do? I only stole your crummy truck, can't we sort something out?"
"We are sortin' something out. I'm gonna kill you in a horrible, painful way. Scream if you like, that only excites me more" replied Zorak, holding the guy by the feet and shoving him against the cactus. The guy screamed and pleaded with AvistA instead.
"Argh!! Hey you! You aren't gonna just stand there and let him do this are you? Please help me!"
AvistA was normally pretty caring but not with those she bore a grudge against and she merely smirked at him.
"Aaagh! Oh come ON!" the guy pleaded.
"Err, no, I think this will be more entertaining. We've chased you halfway across this bloody desert and we aint gunna let you go this easily. Besides, he wants your bones."
Zorak nodded.
"My...bones? You're crazy! Both of you!"
"Need 'em fer my stew. Now shut the fuck up!" he growled, his beak close to the guy's ear.
"No I won't! Let me go!"
The guy's scream echoed across the empty desert plains as Zorak cleanly bit off his ear. "I said shut up." He threatened. The guy fell silent, whimpering occasionally.
"Gimmee the cactus, Avi" said Zorak, reaching out his hand for the cactus she was carefully holding. She put it gently on his palm and stepped back.
Zorak turned to the guy who by now was shaking and bleeding.
"Awright, Sparky, yer gonna eat this" Zorak offered the cactus to the guy. The guy shook his head. "No! I'm not eating that, please let me go...I'll do anything, I'll beg!"
"I don't want you to beg. If you'll do anything, eat this" he shoved it towards the guy again.
The guy shook his head furiously.
"I'll shove it down your pants if you don't" threatened Zorak. The guy just whimpered. So Zorak pinched his nose closed, forcing him to open his mouth in order to breathe and shoved the little prickly cactus in it. Then he forced the guy's mouth shut. The guy cried out in pain.
AvistA stepped up beside Zorak. "Ok, enough torture, he's been upside down long enough, let's just shoot him and get it over with."
"Yeah, I'm bored with playin' around." Zorak got his Matter Intensifier from the truck and aimed it at the guy's head. Bleeding and unable to speak, the guy just looked pathetically into the barrel of the gun.
"Ya might wanna stand back, babe...he's gonna blow"
AvistA stepped back as Zorak sneered at the guy and squeezed the trigger. The bullet seared through the guy's head, shattering his skull in an explosion of blood and brains, more violent since the blood had rushed to his head from being upside down. It soaked the sand around the large cactus in red and the guy's body became limp. Zorak untied it and set it on the ground.
"I'm gonna gut him here for the bones, aint no way I'm haulin' this thing back home" growled Zorak. AvistA ran a claw down the guy's front in a clean slice, through his clothes and skin, which allowed Zorak to sink his fingers in and tear open the body, pulling out his ribs, spine and working out any other bones he wanted. When he was done, AvistA got a bag for the bones and they headed back to the RV.
"Well, that was pretty good. Let's go back home and make this stew!" grinned Zorak.
"What about the space ship?" asked AvistA.
He looked at her, suddenly remembering. "Oh yeah...well we could carry on but I wanna keep this RV so I think we should tow the truck home, drop off the RV, change the tire and carry on the search then. Sound good?"
"Yeah, that sounds like a plan!"
"Awright babe! Then get in and let's get rolling!" Zorak kissed her deeply before winking and jumping in the RV. AvistA followed, waving her tail happily.
It had been one hell of a road trip. But then things usually were like that when Zorak was around. Zorak switched on the metal and they sped down the road, engine roaring, metal blasting and their singing carrying out over the desert.
END
