I know that there's some intra-fandom controversy in regards to whether or not Loki was under Chitauri staff!mind control - "His eyes were really blue there, but not in Thor!" "That's just how his eyes work! It's a genetic thing; they change from blue to green to grey to gold to whatever whenever there's a change in his mood or the light or the clothes he wears!" "Dummy!" "No, you're a dummy!" - but, for me, he was. This is because Thorki needs implicit trust and love and blahblahblah; but Thor, as much as he loves Loki and as much as Loki loves him, couldn't be with someone who knowingly and with intent set out to hurt his friends - basically, new family members, because Thor loves like a puppy: instantly, all-encompassingly. He's beyond devoted. So Loki needs to be either deeply remorseful or to have been under someone else's control, and I wanted to work on the emotional similarities between all the people he tried to zombify.
In The Darkness
He could recall only the dark - the heft of it, cool and smooth, and the pressure it exerted on his mind, locking him back and back and back.
Darkness had been his companion by blinding, muted day and his bedfellow by comforting night. It had blinded him from the truth, from any hint of a hindering moral compass, and cleared his eyes so that he could see the glory in the vicious plans of his Master.
Existence, the Universe, the cosmos, life - all sectile, easily cleft to atoms and reformed without so much as a scar. It was a brilliant vision, one he wished, coolly detached, to share with others.
The darkness had blotted out the turmoil and tumult within him, durm undt strang over a sharply-lit brother in whose shadow he had once dwelled and a family who did not love him as it ought have; it healed his heart by suffocating his pain, his identity.
The Chitauri gave him a scepter upon which a wickedly curved blade was mounted, more scimitar than staff, and bid him share with others whose hearts troubled them - those whose hearts were stained with betrayals and ache.
The eyes of a Trickster are made to see through the vestigial body and into the spirit; it was all too simple for Loki to glean pain and suffering's burning brightness glinting through flesh and blood and bone
"You have heart," he said.
He did not say, Let me heal the pain there.
He did not say, Let me help you.
So. That was fun.
Please read and review.
For sad!little!Loki. He needs huggles via review.
