Tokoyami suddenly felt a presence in the common room of U.A.'s dormitory building. Turning to the side, his body relaxed as he identified the face of his fellow classmate Todoroki Shoto. Both of them traded nods of acknowledgement before the half-half boy spoke up. "Ah. Tokoyami."
"Hello there, Todoroki." Tokoyami was currently leaning against the wall, besides the perfectly comfortable couch that the common room had to offer. Go figure. "It is certainly surprising to see someone else awake this late in the night."
"I can't sleep, so I thought moving around for a moment might help. It gives me time to think too, I guess." Todoroki commented, walking besides Tokoyami and analyzing his casual attire: a simple black hoodie, black jeans and (unsurprisingly) black shoes. He didn't need to ask what his favorite color was.
"I see that we have similar motives, but different contexts." Tokoyami nodded. "It takes a long time to put Dark Shadow to sleep, and it is dangerous if it remains awake when I doze off. It has been particularly stubborn as of recently, for reasons unknown to me."
Todoroki raised an eyebrow. Tokoyami and his quirk were a source of wonder to him. He was always curious to learn more about the creature that delved inside Tokoyami – although sometimes it was difficult to distinguish whether the boy was being dramatic or if raising Dark Shadow was really that intense. He didn't have that many reasons to believe Tokoyami would lie about his quirk, so he always trusted him whenever he'd say something like that.
"But what are you thinking about, if I may ask?"
Todoroki paused to think a bit more about the question. The relaxed atmosphere that had formed between them combined with the exhaustion made Todoroki decide to open up. "A lot of things, but mostly the future. The thought comes and goes every so often, especially in the middle of the night."
Tokoyami gave an understanding nod. "A common subject of doubt for everyone, I believe. I personally try not to think much about it. I find it best not to create expectations, as I might get hurt by them if anything doesn't go as planned."
Todoroki hummed in response, raising his shoulders and then dropping them in a lax shrug. "I don't like the obscurity. I try to push my thoughts away, but they sometimes end up catching to me. Like tonight. I usually try to move outside, but being by a window helps as well. The night is calming."
Tokoyami simply nodded in agreement, and soon enough they both fell in silence. It was a comfortable silence – both of them simply enjoying the night for a moment – but after a while Tokoyami simply felt like he had to say something.
"These dormitories sure are convenient. Cementoss did a mostly excellent job. Except with the soundproofing."
Todoroki looked confused, and Tokoyami quickly followed up with an explanation before he could start thinking he was the source of the loud noises in question. "It is a bit indecent to speak of such a subject out loud, but… Ojiro and Tooru's rooms are next to mine, and sometimes during the night they sneak into each other's rooms. Mostly not for training."
"Ah." Todoroki raised his eyebrows once again. He wasn't the most engaged when it came to social activities, so he wasn't aware of such a relationship. "I'd imagine it's exhausting. I don't have any issues with it most of the time, aside from when Bakugou yells."
"Yes, that too. It's a miracle Iida isn't patrolling the halls anymore with that many students disturbing the order at night. He caught me here a few times and spent thirty minutes explaining to me why a good night of sleep was important." Tokoyami groaned at the memory. "At least he means well."
"Yeah, he caught me once too. I'm surprised he hasn't become strained from his lectures." Todoroki paused, deciding to change the subject once he noticed Tokoyami had ran out of words. "I'm surprised I haven't seen you around here before, I guess I haven't been that observant. How long does it take for you to finally rest?"
"A decent amount of time, usually well past midnight. I usually stay in my own room in the meantime, but sometimes I climb up to the roof as well. I'm around here today because I needed a glass of water."
"I'd imagine it's exhausting."
"It's annoying, but it's a fair price to pay for such a versatile quirk like mine. Besides, I'm getting used to it, I don't need nearly as much sleep as I used to anymore."
Todoroki nodded and both boys fell in comfortable silence once again. He wasn't going to bed anytime soon, and by the sound of it Tokoyami wasn't either, so he settled on another route. "If you aren't going already, would you like to head to the roof? It sounded like a good idea… After your water, of course."
"I already had it, so we can go now."
Both students then proceeded to the roof. It wasn't a particularly exciting place by itself, containing only a few clotheslines and flower pots. They both sat by the guard rails, appreciating the cool night air. There were no clouds in the sky, so it was possible to observe a multitude of stars and planets – even though Musutafu was a particularly bright city. Tokoyami looked at them for a while before pulling out his phone.
"There are more people still awake than I originally thought." He commented, scrolling through his contact list. "Mostly people with low grades. Unsurprisingly."
Todoroki was peering at the sky, feeling the gentle breeze against his form and enjoying the brief silence before Tokoyami spoke up. He looked over at the bird-boy and gently arched his eyebrows. "Ah, they tend to be. Sero isn't quiet when leaving his room at night."
He scoffed, looking back up at the sky. It was amusing. "So much energy."
"I still don't get Sero. He is a relatively good student in theory, yet he still chooses to harm his grades by doing things like that." Tokoyami shook his head. "But I guess this is U.A., after all. He'll get to his senses soon enough."
Todoroki agreed with a nod and took out his own phone. The light fights his eye once it's turned on, but soon enough he is scrolling too. He leaned back, arching and eyebrow. "I never realized so many people were up this late. No wonder everyone's worn out during class."
"Those are just the consequences of putting unrestricted Wi-Fi on campus, I suppose. Gives students an opportunity to hinder their own learning process." Tokoyami let out a small chuckle. "I saw Iida's status flashing just now. I guess someone doesn't stick to the rules as much as he claims to."
They both fell in silence again, alternating in between looking at the sky and commenting about whichever 1-A students were awake at the moment. It wasn't much in terms of entertainment – but for the two boys that were known to be some of the quietest in their classes, it was a comfortable bonding experience.
Tokoyami suddenly frowned – as well as he could for someone who had a bird head, that is. "Koda is online as well. I wonder if there is something bothering him or if he's just taking care of another stray animal."
Todoroki let out a simple hum. There wasn't much to comment on Koda, really. Statistically speaking, his animal voice quirk wasn't very useful in combat. But as a student, Koda was caring and trustworthy. He'd always be taking care of injured animals he'd find, even if that sometimes meant he'd have to bend school regulations in doing that. He was also very good at keeping secrets, which is why nobody had ever reported him to the staff or Iida.
Tokoyami paused for a long while after that. In his mind, he was debating whether or not to trust Todoroki with a particular piece of information about him – one that could be considered a secret. Besides the fact that the two hadn't spoken with each other a lot until that point, there was no real reason not to tell. Todoroki also had his fair share of touchy subjects and knew how to keep quiet about the right things at the right times.
As the gentle night breeze ruffled their hairs (or feathers), Tokoyami took a deep breath and finally spoke up.
"I like him."
"Ah." Although Todoroki didn't expect something like that from Tokoyami, he appreciated the trust that the shorter boy felt with him. He looks nearly awkward as he debates in his mind what exactly to respond with, as he wasn't particularly the most graceful with interpersonal relationships. But he still wanted to be there for him.
Finally, he tilted his head back towards Tokoyami, hoping the time that passed while he was pondering hadn't been too awkward. "Are you going to tell him?"
"Eventually, I guess." Tokoyami looked away. "I'm… Not ready yet. For what might happen if the feelings aren't mutual."
"I don't think you should worry about it." Todoroki turned forward to face the sky once again. "Weigh the options in your head. What's the worst that could happen?"
"He could stop talking to me, if things get particularly awkward. It's already hard enough to make friends being like this," Tokoyami said, gesturing towards his bird head, "I don't want to lose my best one."
Todoroki remained quiet, understanding the seriousness of the situation. It was not something he had gone through himself – at least not in the same way as the other had – so he felt like he couldn't give much input on the situation. Only help reassure him about the future.
Tokoyami let out a heavy sigh, as if he had finally let out something he had been bottling up for his whole stay at U.A. "You're the second person I'm telling about this, the first one being Shoji. Although I'm afraid someone else might have caught onto this without my permission. I've caught Mina following me and Koda a few times, but I didn't press her about it in any of them because I was afraid of what she might know."
Todoroki is silent for a moment, thinking. "Do you think she'll bring it up?"
"I don't know." Tokoyami shrugged. "I don't think she means harm, but she isn't very good at keeping secrets. Or noticing when something is one."
Todoroki hesitated briefly, nodding once more. "I hope she doesn't mention anything. She does have a tendency to gossip a lot, though."
Tokoyami agreed wordlessly, turned to face Todoroki once again. "Do you think it's childish to be worried about things like this?"
Todoroki paused to think about the answer, searching within himself for the best words to use. "No. I think no matter who you are, you're going to have to concern over things like this. Once you start doubting, it spreads and becomes hard to shake off."
Tokoyami remained silent for the time being, so he decided to continue with his little motivational speech. "But it isn't impossible to beat, I think. Think of your worst case scenario for a moment. Does it really seem like him to cut ties so quickly?"
He shifts his position, bringing his knees up and leaning back for a moment. "No less with a good friend. A best friend."
Tokoyami listened to the whole thing in silence, trying to make sense of it by himself. He let out a small sigh, copying Todoroki's new position. "I guess you might be right. Shoji said something similar when I talked to him about this. Logically speaking, there is no harm in simply talking to Koda about it. If things do not work out romantically, we can still keep being friends. And that is perfectly fine by me."
A pause. "But there are a lot of things out of my control that can go wrong. My family has always been particularly finicky about my reputation and relationships in general. I don't think they're going to be very pleased when they find out I'm gay. And if we're being honest, it's likely that Mina has already shared the information with her close group of friends. Most of them are polite enough not to bring it up when I'm present, I guess, but this could get out of control pretty quickly."
Todoroki was silent once again, as he was nothing if not a good listener. Plus, the concerns with Tokoyami were all but easy to talk about. "I don't think you need to feel pressured telling your family if you can anticipate something wrong happening. However… Family should care for you no matter the circumstances or their own ideologies."
"You of all people know that what a family should do isn't always what they end up doing, Todoroki." He paused. "I'm sorry about my tone. I meant no harm."
Todoroki's eyes closed as the boy mentioned family again. There was a sigh that never escaped his nostrils. He holds back from reacting much, resorting to a simple response. "It's okay. I understand why you'd be hesitant. At any rate, it's better than going off impulse."
Tokoyami simply nodded. While they were speaking, he had picked up his phone and opened his text conversations again, hovering his finger over Koda's chat box. With Todoroki at his side, he felt like it would be so much easier if he just… Spilled his feelings right there and now, with not a single care in the world. But he knew he shouldn't be careless like that, and that there would be some consequences he'd have to face if he did it at such a time. He closed the chat and instead opened his empty conversation with Mina Ashido instead.
"I'm going to talk to Mina about it." He affirmed, picking up his phone from his pocket once again. "What about you, Todoroki? Is there anyone you are interested in?"
Todoroki paused at the question, opening his eyes once more to briefly ponder over the answer. He wondered if it was worth telling, but he supposed he might as well since Tokoyami had already opened to him. "Yes."
Tokoyami remained silent at the answer. He was curious to know who that person might be, but he didn't want to press his friend any further about the subject. Just knowing their situations might be similar made him feel a little more comfortable in talking to him about these kinds of subject. For the next five minutes he typed his message to Mina, stating that he didn't mind her knowledge of his crush as long as she didn't do anything "irresponsible" with it. He'd delete and rewrite the sentences until the long wall of text looked acceptable enough for him, and finally sent it to Mina.
"I feel like Dark Shadow has just fallen asleep." He paused. "But I don't want to go back to my room just yet. I have a lot in my mind. I want to know what her answer will be."
Todoroki appreciated the silence. It was better than him practically shutting down at the thought of his crush. He gets antsy and flustered around the subject, and that was a feeling he always disliked.
"I'm sure she'll reply soon." He paused. He didn't want to sound like he knew it all – because he certainly didn't – but he could step back and analyze Tokoyami's situation as best as he could. "I think you're doing the right thing. Mina is reasonable."
The results came quicker than Tokoyami expected, but not how he expected. Mina herself hadn't replied to him, but every other person of her close friend group started sending him messages. He was too flustered to read them in depth, simply locking his phone and resting his face in between his hands. "I feel like I just made a very poor choice. I'm glad we don't have classes tomorrow, it's going to take a while before I can face any of them again."
Todoroki noticed the change in demeanor, figuring whatever response wasn't ideal. His lips curve downward slightly. "What did she… Ah, they. I see now."
He's quiet for a moment, letting out a soft sigh. Interfering wasn't ideal in a situation like this. Tokoyami would just have to push on his own, and hopefully he could advise him decently. He gently patted the boy's shoulder. "I don't understand why it's treated like this, it's disrespectful. It may not seem ideal right now but I'm sure things will turn out as they should, Tokoyami. You're doing what you can."
"I don't want to go back to my room. They're probably waiting for me there."Tokoyami groaned in response. "It's probably because of the stupid "matchup game" I've overheard Mina and Tooru talking about one of these days. Something about whoever guesses right on who a person ends up with has to pay a meal for someone else who betted on a different pairing with the same person."
After a while, he decided to check his phone again. Most of the messages were of support, with a few unfortunate invasive questions sprinkled in between. "This… Could have been a lot worse actually. Although Mina has been awfully quiet, even though she did read the message."
Todoroki relaxed once the boy started reading his texts. He wouldn't advise Tokoyami to stay out of his room for the whole night, he wasn't resilient about it. What could have gone wrong was particularly unsettling; the thought of that happening to him in regards to his own crush was less than ideal.
"Maybe she's just thinking carefully about her answer. I wouldn't jump to conclusions just yet." Todoroki's shoulders relax, allowing the cool night breeze to hit them. "It's nice of them, even if it seems a bit overwhelming."
"I guess. I could always use some helpful advice, they seem to possess far more experience in regards to romantic relationships than we do. She might be discussing in her "squad" group chat or whatever, I'm sure I can take something out of it regardless of how cheesy it–"
Tokoyami suddenly stopped dead in his tracks. A single notification popped up on his phone. It was from Koda.
"Hey, are you up? I want to talk about something."
Well, that was a coincidence. Or it would have been, if a text from Mina didn't arrive soon after and confirm all of Tokoyami's worst suspicions.
"You're welcome ;)"
Todoroki had been stargazing peacefully until he noticed Tokoyami suddenly change his facial expression to a rather upset one. He shifted a bit to face him in a more direct manner, deciding to go through the cautious route. "Is something wrong, Tokoyami?"
Tokoyami was paralyzed, not being sure of what to feel or think about the matter until he started feeling sick. Negative emotions like this fortunately weren't enough to make Dark Shadow go into a murderous rampage like the ones felt at the training camp, but they'd still wake the entity up and make it metaphorically bite his insides.
"I can't… She…" He clutched his phone close to his chest, letting out a sort of nervous chuckle. "She really did do it. I… I don't feel well here anymore. I need some water."
Todoroki felt his stomach flip. A sense of uneasiness and anxiety for his friend was simmering in his gut – dull, but undoubtedly there. At this point, he was simply there to be of support. He decided not to press about the details, but instead nod and stand up slowly. He extends a hand, offering to help him up. Tokoyami hesitantly took it and got up as well. He nervously looked around the roof, deciding to go down through the security ladder that clung to the edge of the building instead of using the main stairs, as it was his best chance of not being seen.
Once they reached the ground, the full impact of the situation seemed to had hit Tokoyami hard. He removed the battery from his phone with shaky hands, and stuffed both parts back in his pocket. Todoroki followed quietly behind him him, shifting his gaze and tilting his head towards the cafeteria not too far across campus from the dormitory building they were on. He hesitated briefly before speaking up once again.
"Try to keep yourself as stable as you can, breathe in and out slowly. Are you sure you don't need to sit down for a moment?"
Tokoyami, however, wasn't really listening to anything he was saying. He knew the other was speaking but he couldn't distinguish any of the words that came out of his mouth. His inner monologue and anxieties were taking full control of his mind. He simply walked along and nodded to everything the other was saying, even if it didn't really make sense to. Eventually, the pressure proved to be too much for him to handle. He stopped near a building hallway through their trajectory to the cafeteria, using his arms to support him as he faced the wall. He was starting to hyperventilate.
"She… She told him, Todoroki. I don't know exactly what, but he… He knows now, he…" Tokoyami was struggling to pour a coherent explanation out. "I can't talk to him right now, I can't… I'm not… not…"
Tokoyami's voice started to crack. He lost control of his wobbly legs and fell to the ground, curling into a ball. Quiet sobs could be heard coming out of the shaking form that used to be Tokoyami. He was covering his face with his arms and knees, but it was still possible to see the small barrage of tears hitting the ground.
There was an increased worry from the sight of Tokoyami so shaken, usually such a levelheaded peer – Todoroki would have nearly scoffed if someone mentioned his classmate reacted like this to him mere hours ago. But that was hardly the case right now. His eyebrows raised as Tokoyami collapsed and curled up. His voice got caught in his throat before he bent down – keeping a slight distance as to not overwhelm him. His eyes shift with concern, feeling both disdain towards Mina and sympathy towards Tokoyami. How could a person be so careless of others' feelings?
"Tokoyami. I'm sorry." He was thinking of a way to fix this, but he can only see the route of confronting Mina about it – and Tokoyami wasn't really in a good enough condition for that at the moment. Instead, he gently reached out and touched his shoulder, allowing a gently-cooled hand to softly knead against it. "You don't have to speak to him right now. It's okay."
Tokoyami took a long time to get out of that state. Even when he thought he was done letting out his frustrations, another simple thought disrupted his composure and sent him back to square zero. He was a mess at that point, not being able to say anything coherent or leave that vulnerable position. It was a really surreal experience for Todoroki to see the usually calm boy break down so hard like that.
Todoroki was comforting the boy as best as he could in a situation like that. Slowly rubbing his back, he allowed Tokoyami to cry it out. He thought that would be the best thing to do in this situation. He needed to get his emotions out somehow, and anything would do better than rash decisions.
Eventually, his sobs stop and his breathing slows down. He dried off his face with the back of his hand. He still can't make himself look at Todoroki in the eye just yet after having just exposed such a personal side of himself so suddenly. He stared forward blankly, trying to collect his thoughts before he slowly got up and practically limped towards a nearby water fountain. The cool liquid helped him clear his mind and gave him enough courage to make eye contact with Todoroki once again as he tried his best not to devolve into his previous messy state.
"Todoroki. Can you lend me your phone for a moment?"
"My phone?" He watched as the other regained his composure and got back in front of him to make the simple request. It would be best not to counsel him just yet; Still, the inquiry for his phone threw him off-guard just a bit. He hesitated before pulling it out and handing it over. He didn't want Tokoyami to do anything he would regret. "What do you need it for?"
"I want to call Koda. Before things get worse." Tokoyami sighed. He was slowly going back to his usual stoic demeanor, but there was no use in trying to look tough in front of Todoroki anymore as he had seen it all. "I am not in a good enough condition right now to look at my phone. Please. I just want to make a call."
Todoroki studied him for a moment, pressing his lips together briefly in thought. He seemed to have been calming down by now, and the impulsivity of his decisions were more likely than not lowered. He trusted him.
"Alright." He unlocked his phone and offered it to his friend, peering down at him with gentle eyes. Hopefully this would help. It may be hard, but addressing the situation directly may prove to be the most efficient route. He just hoped that this wouldn't get any messier for the poor boy. "I understand, go on."
Tokoyami muttered a quick thank you before picking up the phone. Not wanting to increase Todoroki's phone bill, he chose to call Koda through the messaging app they were using earlier. In the five or so seconds before his friend picked up the phone, it felt like his heart was going to stop. Then finally, the familiar voice came.
"Hello? Yes, I am sorry for calling this late. I… I would like to talk to you in person. Tomorrow afternoon. We can discuss the time later, I'm… Yes, my phone is malfunctioning right now. See you soon."
He quietly ended the call and handed the phone back to Todoroki. It was difficult to tell the specifics of his facial expression because of his bird features, but he at least looked more relaxed now. "Thank you for everything, Todoroki. I'm sorry for involving you in this mess. I'm grateful for everything you've done for me."
The apology surprised Todoroki as he took his phone and deposited it into his pocket. "It's okay, you don't need to apologize. I will do my best to help you."
"I don't think there's anything else that can be done right now. I just have to think of what to say when I meet with Koda, and… Probably scold Mina later as well." Tokoyami dusted the dirt off his clothes. "I don't know what to do about her friends, though. Tooru won't keep the secret for long – if I can even call it that at this point."
"Do you think it's this difficult for her to keep quiet?" He raised an eyebrow, an honest tone in his voice even though he doubted of such a thing himself.
"Yes. No… I don't know. I'm tired." He sighed, scolding himself for having overreacted like that.
Todoroki figured the night atmosphere could help; the air was fresh and the breeze gentle – but not cold. He turned to search for one of the many benches across campus, figuring the cafeteria might not be the best choice anymore. "Why don't we sit somewhere more convenient?"
Tokoyami nodded and followed him quietly across campus, sitting besides him on the chosen bench.
"It's pretty late already." He thought staying awake would make time pass slower, but it seemed to be working against him. Had it really been that long since he first left his dorm? Not like he could go to sleep anytime soon anyways. Dark Shadow was awake and ready to burst out at the slightest feeling of negative emotions. "I wonder if everyone has already gone to sleep."
"It's getting quieter." Todoroki leaned his back against the bench, having pulled out his phone at the other's comment. "Everyone must have worn themselves out."
Finally, his faze shifted towards Tokoyami, locking with the other's red hues. "I think things should be okay. I doubt Tooru will say something, at least for tonight." He paused. "I'm sorry this isn't going as smoothly as you'd like."
Tokoyami simply stares at the stars for a while before turning to face Todoroki once again. He thinks about to say for a while, quietly shaking his head at the comment in the meantime. "It's not your fault." He looked down. "I'm sure everything is going to be fixed tomorrow. Either that, or… No, it will get fixed."
He let out a soft sigh. "It's best if we don't talk about this anymore, at least for tonight. I've had enough of being the center of attention for a day."
Todoroki opened his mouth to speak, but shut it briefly once Tokoyami insisted on the change of topic. He nodded understandingly, agreeing that a change of pace would certainly help. "That's fine."
He went quiet, looking up at the sky for some time. He isn't sure what else to say, and doesn't speak for a while until he recognizes what he had been wanting to mention since his suggestion to sit down. "Do you mind if I tell you something private?"
"Hm?" Tokoyami turned to face him. "Go ahead. I'm listening."
"When I said I also liked someone, back at the roof. It's Yaoyorozu." Todoroki's eyes dropped to the ground briefly, and although he didn't look too different, his lips were subtly twisted into an expression of fluster. An eye for an eye; they'd share each other's secrets – or in Tokoyami's case, half-secret. He is unsure of what else to say for a moment, but he figured an explanation as needed. "She's nice."
Tokoyami simply nodded, connecting the pieces in his mind. It was pretty obvious that Yaoyorozu was interested in Todoroki, both platonically and romantically. Her change of behavior near him after the finals against Aizawa was noticeable, and Tokoyami had caught her talking about the boy's qualities a few times as he walked through the halls at night. But the other way around? He wouldn't have guessed. Todoroki's feelings felt like they were sealed inside a bulletproof safe sometimes – or inside a glacier, if you will.
On the other hand, Todoroki was nothing if not oblivious at the fact, and despite everything it was hard for him to connect the dots between him and Yaoyorozu. It was one of the many side effects of his poor socialization as a child.
"She is." Tokoyami finally replied. Would it be rude to tell him that his feeling were obviously mutual? He didn't want to accidentally offend Todoroki – or put him in a state similar to his own – so he simply brushed that thought aside. "I think you two are good for each other."
Despite his obliviousness, Todoroki appreciated the other's supportiveness, no less because it got Koda off Tokoyami's mind even if just for a moment. He tilted his head to peer at Tokoyami completely, heterochromic eyes studying the other gently. "Thanks."
He looked back at the sky and closed his eyes, letting the night air fill his lungs and put him in a more relaxed state. "I appreciate your company."
