Hello, Hello Guys! So hey I've always loved the Saints row series and always wanted to post a story on her but the feeling went away but guess what it came back after I played it again, I mean how could you not! (and after listening to Joel Compass' 'Back To Me") So here it is please enjoy and don't forget to R&R! (:
We have all been there, we all had the feeling of regret or lost that we never could do anything about, it leaves us feeling broken with a heart full of hearted either focused on someone or worst yourself.
She stood in front of the mirror pressing all her weight on the sink, her hands into fists frustrated at the woman looking back at her.
Her skin was as pallid as cream so white it would send the feeling of coldness when you see it. She accepted her blondness even enhanced it by excess bleaching. She looked like a walking talking doll not that she looked synthetic but she looked so different from the way she was before.
"You've changed."
She removed her black fingerless gloves and opened the tap, splashing water on her face trying to clear her mind. She then grabbed a paper towel to remove the dark purple cosmetic tint off her luscious lips and when that was done she moved onto the black Smokey powder on her eyelids.
She closed her eyes and signed again the nagging feeling tugging on her chest was being unbearable, she tried with all her might to fight it but how could anyone cope with losing one of your most closest and dearest friends.
Familiar pale icy blue eyes greeted her as her eyes fluttered open, she took a long hard look trying to recognize who she was staring at.
She could blame it on maturing everyone matures sure not everyone changes.
The boss looked down at her hands, the hands that ran the saints, the hands that killed and the hands that built.
She lay her yes on her clothing, her incredibly skin tight clothing not to mention her highest high heels that you wouldn't think would be appropriate for running and driving around after gang bangers.
The twenty year old something shook her head with a small laugh remembering want kind of footwear she used to sport; plat formed combat boots.
"That little Goth girl is no more."
That little spunky Goth girl would probably run things quite differently made the right choices that would probably mean she wouldn't be where she was standing right now.
She felt so bad, so guilty and overall depressed. She never thought about losing him this early not matter how many years she claimed to have known him it was still too early.
The show she put on everyday for her lieutenants was an Oscar worthy performance, The bright beaming smile the crazy antics one after another made it seem that she didn't even care about the lost of their oldest saint after herself of course.
She had to be strong that was what she was best at and she was never used to opening up, showing her feelings she was hard as a rock people often mistook it as cold heartedness.
She made her way back to her bedroom to be faced by a picture resting on her coffee table. She walked to it and took it in her hand. The picture was of her and Johnny all beaten and bruised up sporting guns in their hands and bright smiles on their faces even though they were stained with blood.
"It's all my fault." She said caressing the photo fighting back the feeling of hot tears forming in the corner of her eyes the unfamiliar feeling of crying crept through out her body, she hadn't cried for years and if she could had her way she would stick with her streak.
"I'm sorry." She sobbed feeling angry with herself tossing the picture frame onto the ground making it shatter into pieces soon broken glass covered the floor. Tears rolled down her face the tears she forced back for months but it slowly sink in that he wasn't going back he won't be knocking on her door and say hello telling her his fine, he wasn't his dead and she couldn't do anything about it.
The boss slammed her back against the wall muffling her underneath her palm.
She took the image of crying as a sign of weakness; a gang leader should never be caught crying she would rather be seen dead.
She slid down onto the floor sitting in the corner balling her eyes out. She surged her face in her hands pulling herself together. The boss pulled herself up to her feet as she spotted the pistol placed on the nightstand. She took it and left the room with her unstable emotional state.
As soon as she opened the door loud club music greeted her she was not in the mood to socialize specifically not in a partying mood.
A few of her crew where drinking and the usual getting high.
She extended her hand up and fired a couple of rounds making everyone turn and look in fear.
"GET THE FUCK OUT!" She yelled with veins popping out of her neck her eyes wide as the moon she was in no mood to messed with and everyone knew it.
And without missing a beat everyone dispersed in such a hurry that they left everything behind, the drink the drugs and thankfully none of the special entertainment.
She eyed the powdery substance on the glass coffee table. She shrugged her shoulders and took out something out of her back pocket; a wad of money neatly held together by a gold 14k money clip, she took out a dollar bill and rolled it effortlessly, she took a seat in front of the table dipping her head down and her nose on the rolled up bill snorting in what looked to be a cocaine mountain.
The boss stayed in that seat the whole not only leaving to get drinks from kitchen a bottle of beer, a glass of whiskey and a couple of bottles of vodka.
"Are you sure she's here Pierce?" A voice of female asked sound like it could be Shaundi.
"I think…"
A loud ding echoed in the penthouse as the elevator doors slid open letting Shaundi and Pierce step off.
"Boss?" Shaundi called but no answer.
She pressed forward with pierce following behind.
"Boss?" Pierce took his turn with calling The boss but still no answer.
Both stopped in their tracks as they saw her with her face shoved into the table with a bottle of booze in hand.
The two lieutenants gave each other a look communicating without saying a word, looking like no one wanted to ruin the boss's fun.
Pierce rolled his eyes at Shaundi and cleared his throat. "Yo boss…"
The boss sat up taking a swing of her chosen poison staring down the two who were just staring back not sure what to say. They've seen each other in weird situations before but The boss was the one who choose to stay away from all the drugs unless she was in her ever so rare problematic states.
She wiped her nose in an uncaring fashion and took another sip of her drink before attending to her friends.
"What?" She asked starkly.
"You haven't answered your phone in days boss." Pierce replied stepping closer and attempted to take a seat beside the boss but the expression on her face told him other wise.
"Shits over with and done don't I deserve a God damn break?" She snarled at him slamming the now empty bottle of vodka on the table.
"We were just worried about you after killbane escaping and all." Shaundi informed placing a hand on her hip looking at The boss's bare face a sight she hadn't seen in years.
The boss smirked letting out a small dry chuckle looking at Shaundi like she was being irrational. "Who'd you prefer to be under rubble right now, dead?" She said coldly shocking Shaundi and Pierce.
"No, but-" Shaundi began
"I thought so." She cut her off
Pierce sat on the table watching these two fully-grown women stare each other down and he knew havoc was going to break lose anytime soon.
The boss ran her eyes up and down Shaundi examining her clothing, her hairstyle and even how she stood.
"I liked you better when you were a care free junkie now look at you you're just a snobby little bitch."
"What did you say?" Shaundi snapped getting up close and person with The boss, Pierce getting in between the two.
"Now, now calm down." Pierce smiled trying to be the peacemaker like he always was.
"You think you're better with your blonde hair and fucking purple lipstick? You're not better than me in fact your worst!" Shaundi retorted harshly pointing at The boss trying her best to escape Pierce's grasp.
The boss seemed to be un-phased by all of this even though she was the one who started it. She took a cigarette off the table and grabbed a purple zippo out her pocket lighting the stick with ease.
She turned to the red faced Shaundi. "What you want to hit me? Come on." The boss called her out clearly the alcohol and drugs were talking. She was the type to call someone out if they truly and gravely offended her even though she's clearly the violent type.
"Shaundi… no don't listen to her, she's not herself." Pierce held Shaundi down giving words to help her let the moment pass.
She pushed him away in anger. "I think she's the one you should be talking sense into not me."
Pierce looked over his shoulder seeing The boss not having moved from her seat finishing her cigarette like lung cancer was the next big thing.
"I will… when she gets sober." He replied nodding not removing his eyes on his boss, the woman sitting on the leather couch busy looking at nothing silently enjoying her cigarette minding her own business but he knew her, she was deep in thought and he also knew it wasn't good for her.
The boss stood up putting out the cigarette on a fleur-de-lis shaped ashtray and headed back into the kitchen where she almost emptied out by now.
"What… where is she doing?" Shaundi pointed out as the two followed her half way seeing if she was getting food or a knife to stab someone with they never knew when it came to her.
The boss walked into the bar and rummaged the shelves in search of more alcohol and when she found one; a whiskey bottle probably as old as her. Her eyes popped open like a child seeing the newest toy on Christmas morning.
"Um… Boss don't you think you had enough?" Pierce watched her open the bottle with her bare teeth and gulp down half of the liquid.
"Piss off." She waved him off.
"Boss do having something against your kidneys or what?" Shaundi asked reaching for the bottle trying to pry it out of her hands but no luck The boss held onto that bottle for her dear life.
The boss paused and clasped her hand on her mouth making gagging sounds looking like she had her fair share of liquor for the night.
"So this is how fatherhood feels like." Pierce spoke out with a small laugh.
"Pierce could you not…" Shaundi darted him a glare gesturing to drag their boss out of the kitchen and into a cold shower or at least bed lock it throw away the key and take all of her weapons before she could pull something out of her sleeve.
"How does a cold bath and bed sound like?" Shaundi asked The boss in her nicest tone even patting her legs like she was some sort of pet.
"What is she your Dog?" Pierce gave her a look shaking his head.
"How about food?" She continued and right on queue The boss pushed the two out of the way running for the sink to blew up chunks.
Pierce made a face even though he couldn't see anything. "That's shits nasty."
Shaundi rolled her eyes yet again and slapped Pierce's arm getting his attention.
"Just get her to bed for Christ sake already."
The boss whipped her mouth with the back of her hand while grasping the counter top with her other hand with all her strength since in her mind everything was a blur and she felt that the floor was moving like every step she moved was on unknown step on a staircase.
She soon feel over knocking all of the glasses with her down to the floor making Pierce and Shaundi stop arguing for a minute to turn to check on their boss who was already sleeping on the floor with the dishes.
"Shit." They said in union begging they ascent towards The boss. Pierce reached down with ease scoping her into his arms.
Shaundi ran a hand through her hair sighing deeply. "Getting wasted once in a while fine but doing it everyday is different." She said looking over the Saints leader with worry in her voice.
"You're not the only one who's coping Shaundi, She knew him the longest and you ask why we never see her mourn… this is her way."
Pierce placed The boss into bed as she was and just pulled a blanket over her and closed the lights but as he was on his way out the door he noticed the floor covered in broken glass.
"You destroyed this room to boss?" He laughed silently walking deeper into the room stepping accidentally on a piece of paper. Pierce exhaled and kneeled down avoiding the shuttered glass and picked up the piece of paper where he saw in the dimmed light that it was a photo.
He looked back at the sleeping The boss and back at the picture while he pulled himself up to his feet.
"You still have us boss." He said pocketing the photo and then leaving silently making sure he did not wake her up.
TO BE CONTINUED...
