First up, this story is a work of comedy so please don't take it too seriously. Any and all feedback is welcome.

Chapter 1: The Inefficient Owl Postal Service and a Chance Encounter of the Romantic Kind

This is the story of when Aragorn got his acceptance letter to Hogwarts. I mean, yeah. He was 80 something when he got it, but it takes a long time for an owl to fly from Scotland to Gondor. Anyway he got this letter and it said "Well done Aragorn, you are a wizard! Come to Hogwarts and don't forget to go to Diagon Alley to get a wand and things." Aragorn was like "Whaaaa?! Isn't Gandalf the wizardy one?" But Gandalf said "You are a wizard too, Oh Kingly One." And then he used his magic to get Aragorn to Diagon Alley. But not diagonally because he's not an idiot.

First things first, Aragorn needs a wand. He goes to Olivander's Magical Stick Shop and Olivander finds him a wand. Oli's like "Curious... It's the same wand as the legendary witch Willow from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. That'll be 400 galleons and 16 and a half knuts." But Aragorn's like "What a rip-off." And he steals Gandalf's staff and runs to Hogwarts on the train.

Gandalf follows on Shadowfax because he wants his staff back. But when Gandalf gets to Hogwarts he can't find Aragorn. But he does find his way into the great hall, where the sorting feast has just finished. The room is empty, but the desert leftovers are still on the tables. He starts happily stuffing his face with delicious éclairs and doughnuts and chocolate frogs when he hears a munching sound coming from behind a large devil's food cake. "Aragorn? Is that you?" He asks, spooning the cake into his mouth. But when he'd eaten enough to see to the other side, he saw that it wasn't Aragorn. It was...

Dumbledore!

They just kind of gaze at each other for a little bit. Chocolate sauce dripping from their mouths. Then Dumbledore breaks the silence with "I don't know who you are, but would you like to come up to my office to watch some Netflix and chill?"

Gandalf and Dumbledore head up to Dumbledore's office and settled down to watch Mean Girls. It as the wizard version of Mean Girls where Lindsey Lohan's character is played by a hippogriff. D-dude and the Gandi-man Netflix'd and chilled, but neither of them made any move on the other until the early hours of the morning.

"I should probably go to bed." Dumbledore muttered, yawning. "Tell Hagrid I said you could bunk with him."

"Thank you, Dumbledore. I'll head down there now." Gandalf replied. "Will I see you again tomorrow?"

Dumbledore rubbed his beard thoughtfully. "I think I have a meeting with Professor Trelawney tomorrow evening that I don't fancy going to. If you're not doing anything , do you want to meet me in Hogsmede? We could um..." He trailed off.

"Make a date out of it?" Gandalf finished his sentence for him. "If you give me directions, I'll be there at 8." So Dumbledore drew out a map for Gandalf and they both went off to bed.