I had a bit of a hiatus. I've gotten a lot of messages/emails regarding new content, and I loved hearing the various ideas from each message. I promise to eventually write a story that incorporates at least a few aspects of each idea. My newer stories will have a song inspired inspiration, much like "Side A". So, for the time being, I'm back. Hope you enjoy this.

-Maddy

"I'm tired and I felt it for a while now/In this sea of lonely/ The taste of ink is getting old/ It's four o' clock in the fucking morning/ Each day gets more and more like the last day/ Still I can see it coming/ While I'm standing in the river drowning/ This could be my chance to break out/ This could be my chance to say goodbye/ At last it's finally over/ Couldn't take this town much longer/ Being half dead wasn't what I planned to be/ Now I'm ready to be free." The Used- "The Taste of Ink"

Each morning is getting harder. I'm getting sick of waking up to black hair on the pillowcases and slipping on water left on the floor. Living with him was a spur-of-the-moment decision, and in hindsight, the worst decision of my life.

Living out of the tower and like a normal person was supposed to be a huge step up from my teenage years, but now I just want to run the entire way to the gigantic 'T' and take the elevator the entire way up to my old room and never turn back. I bet it still smells like sage and lavender, the way I like it. Not like fish and dirty ocean water.

The year lease is up in two days, and I have yet to decide if I'm finally going to stand up to Aqualad and tell him how I really feel about the half-assed nautical themed bathroom, or the mold that's grown seemingly everywhere due to the dampness in the apartment. I want to finally leave, tell him that I can't handle this anymore, and that none of this is my fault, but all his. He'll be livid, but he won't be heartbroken. His ego is too big to actually give a shit about me. He's only keeping me around as some sort of arm candy, and the entire act is getting old.

I've been secretly packing my things up when he's on "official underwater business", which is basically him and Aquaman swimming around Atlantis all day. I've been hiding boxes in the only closet that he doesn't have some sort of oceanic equipment in. At this point, I should be able to pack up all of my clothes and leave. Maybe that's what I should do.

After thinking it over, I've decided to write a letter.

Dear AL,

here's my last half of the rent. I know this is short notice, but I have to go. Not only will I be permanently leaving this residence, but I no longer wish to be in a relationship. For future reference, maybe you should learn how to be a better roommate/boyfriend.

Lose my number; don't try to get me back.

-Raven

Feeling liberated, I tuck the letter and my $400 half into an envelope and leave it on the dining room table, right next to the TV remote, where I know he'll see it. I bring all of my boxes into the dining room and place them next to the door. I know where I want to go, but I'm not exactly sure how I will get my stuff there. Or if they'll have me. I guess I need to make a few phone calls.

I punch the familiar numbers into my phone and he picks up on the first ring. "Cy? Hey, can you do me a favor?"

After we load all of the boxes into the T-Car, I shut the back hatch and sit on the ledge of the closed trunk. Cyborg sits beside me, lowering the back of the car significantly. "So, what made you finally leave?" he asks. Usually, no one would dare ask that personal of a question, but Cyborg is like a brother to me, and I know he actually cares about the answer I'm going to give him. "Nothing specifically. I was just getting fed up and something just pushed me over the edge. He's just too controlling, and it took awhile, but I know now that I don't deserve that." I've never admitted that to myself until now, but I needed to hear it said out loud. "I understand. I'm glad you're away from him. We didn't like the way he treated you. I'm glad you're coming back. BB hasn't actually had a real conversation with you in what, two years?" he said. I wonder what he would say to me when I got there.

I never forgot about the changeling. I thought about him probably once a week. Aquaman and I were together for a little over two years, and about a year ago I really started thinking about what it would be like if things were different. If I was with someone else. If I was with Beast Boy. When he'd flirt with me in our teenage years, he'd always claim that he would treat me well. I always believed that statement, but it wasn't what I wanted at the time. He was dorky and immature, and I wanted someone different and more mysterious, I guess. Aquaman fit the profile, and we started dating when I was 18, almost 19, and I was absolutely in love. I loved his I-don't-give-a-shit-about-anything attitude, and looking back, that attitude is exactly why I left.

I feel an arm's weight curl around my shoulder. "C'mon, Rae. Let's get going. I'm sure he'll be excited to see you." He hops off the ledge of the trunk and so do I while I try to mentally prepare for the next chapter in my already crazy day. "Yeah, let's get going." I agree. The truth is, I just want to get out of here before Aqualad gets back.

It's almost an hour drive to the Titans Tower from downtown Jump City, including all the traffic and back-ups, which is expected on a Friday afternoon. On the ride to my hopeful new home, Cyborg talks about all the changes since I've been gone, which has been almost 2 years. He talks about how when Batman came to check on how Beast Boy and Cyborg were doing on their own in the tower, he was disgusted by their bachelor-like cleaning habits and hired them a 3-times-a-week maid named Eleanor. He doesn't know, but that gives me hope in regards to how clean my new living arrangement could be. Since Dick and Kori (Nightwing and Starfire) moved out, I imagine that cleanliness wasn't high on the priority list for Cy and Gar. I wonder what else has changed. I wonder if they changed my room.

Multiple stories and about 5 different and unnecessary fits of road rage from Cyborg later, we arrive at the tower. Cyborg pulls into the garage, and nostalgia floods back into my brain.

I remember working with Cyborg on the T-Car in this garage while listening to grunge music from the 90's. I remember hiding Christmas presents in here so no one would find them, even though Starfire did one year while trying to find Silkie. I remember Dick's motorbike that everyone wanted to ride, but nobody was even allowed to touch it. The spot where his bike used to be parked isn't empty, but replaced by a green moped. Just by looking at it, I know it belongs to Gar. I'm glad he finally got one after years of looking.

Cyborg and I walk to the elevator together, and I think he notices that I'm nervous, because he gives me a look that is supposed to be reassuring, but I can't help form being anxious. The last time I was here, I was young and excited to be leaving, but now I'm coming back. I'm starting to see this as a failure, and I'm not surprised that this is happening. I always have a way of making things negative, and here I am, making a positive change into something sad.

My thoughts are thankfully interrupted by the stopping of the elevator, which sends my mind into a panic. Cyborg stands in front of me, which helps, actually. "Don't worry; I'm sure he won't have a problem with this. You're still family, Rae." He fumbles with the box he's carrying, but we eventually get into the living room without dropping anything. I put down my box and look around. No sight of the changeling, which I'm not sure is a good or bad thing. I stand up straight to stretch and lean against a doorway while I wait for Cy to find BB. The door I'm leaning on clicks open.

I move out of the way and spin around fast enough to not completely fall over into the doorway, but end up nose-to-chest with a boy. No, a man. I look up and my eyes are locked with emerald irises. I can't move, and I couldn't if I tried. The green boy that I grew up with and I were eye-to-eye in height when I left, and here I was facing a green man that was easily a good 8 inches taller than me and twice my width. If I saw this guy in a dark alley, I'd run the other way. His eyes open wider and his mouth begins to gape open as realization started to hit him. I start to say something, I'm not sure what, when he puts his hands on my shoulders and gently pushes me backward. "Raven?"

I nod my head yes, and he lets go of my shoulders. "Shit. Sorry. What are you doing here? I mean, I'm glad to see you, but what brings you here? Is everything okay?" He asks. He's nervous. Almost as nervous as I am. Cyborg swings in and saves the day before I can even say anything. "Hey Gar, she's actually planning on moving in, if that's okay with you?" he raises an eyebrow at the changeling. Beast Boy looks at me for a few seconds, and a wide smile spreads across his face, his signature tooth popping out and all. "Of course. Yeah. Welcome home, Rae."

We all go out to the car and unload all of my boxes. Beast Boy got to the car before we did, so he was a few steps ahead when Cyborg tapped my arm and motioned me to stay back a bit. "Hey, Raven. We still have your old room basically all set up, so is it okay if we just move you back into there? I know Dick and Kori's old room was bigger, but we kind of renovated, ya know?" he looked at me with a pleading glance. "Yeah, of course. So like, you guys didn't change my room at all? Why?" I figured they would make it into a game room or something, I don't know. "Actually, BB wouldn't let us change it. He said after a month we could, but when the month passed, he still wanted to leave it how it was, so we did. Honestly, I think he was hoping you would come back, but don't tell him I told you that, okay?" he looked at me with serious eyes, so I knew he meant it. I nod, but I wonder why Gar didn't want to change my room. Maybe he was more attached than I thought.

We take the elevator up and catch up to Gar, who has already moved most of the boxes into my room. He's standing in the middle of the room, looking around and spreading out boxes. The room is painted dark purple, just how I left it. Old candles line the furniture left over from when I couldn't move it into the new apartment, because Aqualad said it was "too creepy". The room smelled of lavender and dust, as well as whatever cologne Gar has on, which smells recently applied. Coincidence?

Everything is right where I left it, including my turntable and vinyl collection. I decide to put on some music, and choose my favorite album from The Smiths, which Gar immediately deems "too depressing". He responds by running to his room and grabbing an album by The Strokes, which I didn't know that he owns, and starts spinning Someday on the table. He starts dancing around as we put my old room back together. Everyone in the room is sporting a grin, and for the first time in a long time, I'm actually happy.

That's all for Chapter 1, folks! Hope you liked it, I'll have more on the way!

-Maddy