Christmas Carol for Piss Poor Potioneers

Ding dong terribly so high

The cauldrons they are smelling

Wafts the smell unto the sky

Throughout the magic dwelling

Ba-ahha ha haha hahaha ha hahhahaharfing gas

Is spreading through the castle

Ba[etc]-rfing gas

Through feast and tree and parcel

In the dungeon feeling low

Professor Snape is stalking

He is wanting for to know

Which culprit? No-one's talking

Chorus

In the great hall by the tree

The headmaster's not happy

He likes his feast and jollity

Someone has made it crappy

Chorus