Title: Ser Pounce
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters/Pairings: DA2 crew: Hawke, Anders, Fenris; hints of Merribela & Fenders
Rating: K
Warnings: OOC-ness (well, this is AU, some OOC is to be expected)
Summary: Anders wants to smuggle a cat into his dorm. / modern college AU
Disclaimer: Dragon Age is not mine, although the writing certainly is.
A/N: request for a friend, based on the prompt "can u help me sneak my cat into my dorm" au found on tumblr.
Let's assume it's a modern AU with elves, mages and all that, don't think too much about how this setting works, it is supposed to be a silly little fic to celebrate Januanders.
There are two 'main' Hawkes because I couldn't decide which one I wanted to include in this story, so there are four Hawkes in total; more Hawkes = more fun (I hope).
Published also on AO3 and my tumblr.
It was a nice sunny day, at least for most people. Standing near the entrance to his dorm, Anders eyed the PETS NOT ALLOWED sign with a big dose of animosity. This rule, of all rules here, was like a thorn in his heart as he was a true animal lover (some called him a 'cat lady' instead, he chose to ignore them, though there was a lot of truth in this nickname). From time to time he anxiously glanced at the bag that hung on his shoulder. Hearing footsteps, he turned around with a smile on his face. And instantly his expression changed to a frown when he saw who else was approaching him.
"What is he doing here? I texted you, not him!" Anders glared at Fenris who was, among other things, the closest thing he got to a true rival.
Marian Hawke, charming as always, raised her hands. "We were training when I got your text. The more the merrier, as they say!"
Fenris looked even more hostile than usually, perhaps because Anders interrupted his quality training time with Hawke. The mage chose to ignore him, for his own good.
"Ok, Blondie, explain what's going on, because I don't think I understood your can u help me sneak my cat into my dorm text."
Anders gave her an apologetic smile. "It's exactly what it says. I want to..." he toned his voice down to a whisper, "sneak a cat into my dorm."
"You do realise when Meredith finds out she'll have your head, and skin the animal," Fenris pointed out.
"This kind of attitude is the reason I asked my good friend Hawke for help, not you," Anders snapped. "According to Orsino, I have a big chance to get hired next year, and I don't want to ruin everything because I didn't follow some stupid, completely unreasonable rule made to oppress good people like me."
The elf snorted. "Aren't you too young to be a college professor?"
"I don't know, aren't you too young to be so dumb?"
"Ah, you two and your eloquent insults," Marian sighed. "Listen, boys, I know you love bickering, but let's talk like adults for a change."
They both rolled their eyes. Hawke couldn't help but smile; these two never realised how much they were alike.
"Anders, I have nothing against animals, in fact I've always wanted to get one of those Mabari dogs, Garett loves them, too. My point is, even if I want a dog, I'm not getting one because pets are forbidden here. You just have to obey this small rule, no matter what your little rebel heart tells you."
"The thing is," Anders blushed slightly, his pale face turning pink. "I already have a cat with me."
"You... what?" Hawke gritted her teeth. She looked at him as if expecting the animal to materialize on his head.
He glanced around suspiciously, and when no enemies of cats were detected, he slowly opened his bag revealing a tiny orange cat sleeping on his herbology book.
"You are impossible," Fenris said, giving the mage a judging look.
"I couldn't just leave Ser Pounce–a–lot out there! He was clearly lost– "
"Ser Pounce–a–lot?" Hawke laughed.
Anders frowned, blush on his cheeks deepening. "Forget it. I shouldn't have asked you, I'll do it myself."
He was ready to turn around and walk away but Hawke put her hand on his shoulder.
"Wait, you grumpy mage, we'll help you."
"We?!" It was Fenris' turn to make an ugly frown. "I'm not taking part in this silliness!"
"That's even better," Anders growled.
"I'm afraid you have to, Fenris," said Hawke and explained her hastily made plan, much to Anders' amazement and Fenris' disapproval.
"Meredith will expel us all if she finds out..." Fenris shook his head. This battle was lost, it was obvious he'd do anything for the Hawkes, no matter how ridiculous it was. And this was probably the most ridiculous plan he'd heard since he met Marian and Garett.
Fenris glared at the creature. The creature glared back. And, oh for Maker's sake!, it started purring, its eyes narrowed as if it was smiling. For the tenth time, he cursed Hawke and her 'wonderful plan'.
"I can't take him with me," Marian explained. "Merrill is a sweet thing but sooner or later she'll forget that keeping a cat in our room is supposed to be a secret, and she'll tell someone. That someone may be, incidentally, Meredith."
Anders nodded, agreeing with Hawke's every word. Merrill was too gullible for her own sake.
"Or Carver will find out, because he's been following her like a creep lately, I think he has a crush on her. He doesn't know about Isabela, Maker save us. My idiot brother will tell Cullen since he wants to be a good little templar." She gritted her teeth.
"And Garett... Well, his situation is even worse. He shares a room with Mr. Holy Spirit of the Maker. Sebastian wouldn't hesitate one second to tell on you."
"That is true, he's not exactly my friend..." Anders added; they knew each other only because of Garett who was unlucky enough to get the student from Starkhaven as his roommate. Hawke didn't mind him as much as others, it seemed, even trying to be 'friends' with Vael while everyone else, Anders especially, disliked the guy with passion.
"Isabela's room is always full of people," she continued. "And booze. Now that I think about it, I can't believe she wasn't expelled already... She got a bit better once she started meeting with Merrill more often but still."
Then Hawke's hypnotizing eyes looked straight at Fenris who felt like he was drowning when he realised what was expected of him. Anders understood where this was going, and had a half angry, half embarrassed expression on his face.
"No," was the elf's only answer.
"Come on, Fen, be a friend!" Marian pleaded. "Forget it's you sworn enemy's cat, do it for me."
"I can't..." the elf said, his resolve weakening every second. Damn these Hawkes and the effect they had on people! And both Marian and Garett knew exactly how loyal Fenris was, they never hesitated to use his emotions for their advantage.
But it wasn't Marian's pleading that earned the elf's 'yes', though he would have said he agrees sooner or later if she kept that up. It was known Marian Hawke had special privileges.
"I'll shut up about mage rights," Anders said, his face painted with a faint red blush, his eyes cold but Fenris could see determination in them quite clearly. "At least in your presence, that is. I'll also pay what you lost last Friday to Isabela when we played at the Hanged Man. Just... keep him for a day before I figure something out."
Hawke, for once, didn't know what to say. She surely didn't plan this to happen. Fenris eyed the mage suspiciously, trying to determine if he was honest. He was; the elf could already tell Anders loved that furry little creature, and was desperate to keep it safe.
Stupid mage.
When Fenris nodded, Marian cheered.
Getting the cat into Fenris' room was easy. Not a single person stopped them as they walked through the dorm. Getting the mage to leave for classes, however, proved difficult.
"Do you want to be late?" Marian pulled his hand once again. "It's like you do everything to get in trouble!"
"Keep him safe!" Anders whispered in a tender voice, staring at Pounce with loving eyes. "I'll be back soon!"
Fenris rolled his eyes. The cat was sitting on his bed, completely oblivious to the chaos around him. Hawke finally managed to push Anders through the door, and the elf found himself alone with the pet.
He wasn't certain what he is supposed to do. The cat just stared. Then the creature moved towards Fenris, and before the elf knew, the kitten was on his lap. He froze, observing Pounce making himself comfortable and curling into a tiny orange furball. And he was purring.
Fenris cursed under his breath. This... this was outrageous, and... and...
His hand hesitantly touched the cat. Having him on his lap wasn't that bad, yet he couldn't believe he allowed this creature to do it. He wasn't some cat–obsessed freak like Anders!
His elven ears twitched.
Seconds before the door opened wide, Fenris grabbed a blanked and covered himself from the waist down. Just like that, Garett Hawke barged into his room. He never knocked, Fenris got used to that long time ago, but now he found it particularly annoying. Marian's brother was like a hurricane with a nicely kept beard, he was always in the centre of attention, much like his sister. It appeared that all available charisma in the Hawke family was passed down to Marian and Garett, leaving two other siblings, Bethany and Carver, in the shadow of the older twins.
He had a laptop in one hand, and a big smile on his face. "Listen, friend, I got– "
"Close the door, Hawke..!" Fenris barked.
"Huh?" Garett blinked in confusion. His eyes travelled down, looking at the blanked and a visible bulge under it.
"Close. The damn. Door."
"OH!" he gasped, quickly closing the door.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your– alone time..." Hawke chuckled, his eyes sparkling, awakening in Fenris a sudden urge to throw something sharp and deadly at him, preferably an axe.
"I'm not alone," he hissed, and put the blanket aside, so his guest would see what was the reason of this commotion.
"It's a... kitten," Garett stated the obvious, staring at the pet with wide eyes and eyebrows raised, somewhat disappointed. "I always thought you're more of a dog person. Or, a no animals in my presence person."
"This... creature isn't mine. Anders found it. I'm– uh" Fenris sighed, not in a mood for explanations. "Ask your sister, it was her idea."
"You're keeping a cat for Anders?" Hawke asked carefully.
"Yes. Why do you sound so surprised?" Fenris didn't like where this conversation was going. He would rather listen to yet another silly thing Garett found on the internet and was currently obsessed with, no matter how stupid it was.
"Hm, from my point of view, you two get along like... well, like cats and dogs," he winked, pleased with himself, like it was the best joke he ever told.
"It was all your sister's idea, as I said. Ask her for details if you are curious. I'm not doing this for the mage," he barked.
"Yeah, right, anywho..." Hawke returned his attention to the laptop he was holding. Fenris was grateful for a change of topic, though he regretted it rather quickly.
"Have you seen what I sent you?" he asked with too much excitement, the question marks almost physically manifesting in the air.
"No, I haven't," Fenris growled. The thing on his lap was... warm and soft. It was getting difficult to hate it. He shifted uncomfortably.
Garett let out a theatrical gasp. "You're ignoring me, as always!"
"Yes, because I told you million times to stop spamming my email with pointless things like cats with cheeseburgers."
"Maker, Fenris, you need to be up to date with the latest trends," Hawke sat down on the chair, putting his laptop on the desk. "You must see the one with goats!"
Fenris was fuming. This day was proving to be extremely difficult. At least the cat was sleeping peacefully... But that was not the point!
He gritted his teeth and prepared himself to listen to Hawke's excited voice, and watch stupid videos trying to keep his comments to himself while Garett was laughing loudly. Of course Fenris couldn't just say 'get out'; Marian's brother had special privileges, as well.
Thirsty minutes later, Hawke was done, thankfully.
"And check your email more often, my friend!"
"All messages from you are instantly deleted."
"You are charming as always!" Hawke closed his laptop, and when he looked at the kitten, his eyes softened.
"That's... nice of you that you're taking care of this little guy," he smiled. "I'll leave you two alone now. Don't worry, I'll be silent like a grave."
Fenris stared at the wall, away from Hawke's honest eyes. He would never admit how much he admired both Marian and Garett, albeit for different reasons. They seemed to be opposites, yet so alike sometimes Fenris wondered if they weren't one soul in two bodies, no matter how ridiculous it sounded.
Hawke got up, taking his charismatic presence away from the elf; every room seemed oddly empty when Hawkes weren't around.
Fenris heard Garett saying, "I know he's an ass sometimes, but... Thanks for doing this for Anders."
"I'm– I'm not– " he wanted to protest but Hawke was already gone.
The kitten opened his eyes, surprisingly big and vividly green, and yawned. He looked quite content, his little paws kneading the elf's lap.
Fenris swore under his breath. The damnable beast was still purring.
There was a knock on the door. Anders looked like he was running all the way back, to get to the cat sooner. Somehow Fenris knew it was true. He had his bag with him, but this time without any cats inside.
Closing the door he noticed an orange furball sleeping comfortably on the elf's lap.
"You have Ser Pounce on your lap," Anders frowned.
Fenris snorted. Was today 'State the Obvious' day?
"I thought you hate cats!"
"I do not hate them, I find them annoying. I made him sleep on my lap to spite you," Fenris replied with a sly smile.
The mage looked genuinely offended. He put the bag away, and knelt on the floor, his eyes fixed on Pounce.
"Here, kitty! Come to daddy!" Anders beamed in a silly voice.
Fenris cringed. He could feel some sort of satisfaction when the cat ignored the mage completely. Obviously this creature recognised the superior specimen here, even though the foolish mage failed to admit it.
"Ser Pounce, you are breaking my heart," the blond pouted, indeed sounding heartbroken.
The cat opened one eye, looked at Anders indifferently, and closed the eye again.
"Well, thankfully, I have something that can serve as a bribe..."
Anders reached for the bag, took out a small bowl and a tin of cat food. Putting a full bowl on the floor, he tried to get the cat's attention again. This time it worked, as Pounce, sensing something to eat, stood up, stretched and graciously landed near the bowl. After sniffing the contents, he began to eat. Anders stared like it was some kind of an incredible miracle he had never witnessed.
Fenris wrinkled his nose. "It smells."
"It's cat food. What do you expect? It can't smell like apples."
The elf frowned, not feeling like continuing this ridiculous conversation could get them anywhere (not that their usual conversations had any value). They watched the cat in silence, Anders still kneeling on the floor but he didn't seem to mind at all, his attention fully devoted to Pounce.
Fenris didn't consider this spectacle as enjoyable as the mage did, so his gaze shifted to Anders. He was tall, obviously taller than Fenris since the mage was human, yet he probably weighted less, hiding his thin body under layers of clothes. His favourite coat with feathered pauldrons (Fenris thought the coat was ridiculous, feathers especially) made him look bigger than he actually was, and without it Anders seemed oddly naked. Now, as he was wearing only old jeans that had seen better times, and a black t-shirt with a logo Fenris vaguely recognised, the elf noticed that Anders looked... frail.
Yes, he was a powerful mage and a highly talented healer, his arms were muscular, and he could clearly defend himself. An average observer would see nothing else, but Fenris wasn't a fool, he could see that Ander's arms, though muscular, were thin, his skin pale as if he was allergic to sun. Always with a light stubble on his face, he often had dark circles under his eyes; he worked in a clinic in the poorest district of Kirkwall, and was most likely earning nothing else than people's gratitude. He could afford studying only because he got a scholarship for highly gifted students – although the money he got was barely enough for a person to survive every month. Plus, he was terrible at card games, though he insisted on joining the others for game nights.
All in all, he was the kind of person who didn't care much about himself. It was only natural that Anders bought food not for himself, but for the cat. Fenris didn't know how to feel about this conclusion; it was easy to see everything in black and white, and Maker knew the elf and the mage couldn't be called 'friends'. Everything had more shades of grey than Fenris felt comfortable to admit.
"You have not eaten."
It was not a question, yet Anders felt obligated to provide an answer in a defensive voice, with a slight frown. Fenris gave him a significant look; he didn't want to listen to lame excuses. To his surprise the mage closed his mouth, his gaze shifted to the kitten. Perhaps he was ashamed. Good, he should be.
Fenris stood up. "I'll get us something to eat, make sure nobody sees your pet," he said, getting up.
Before Anders could protest (and Fenris knew him well enough to expect more excuses and protest), the elf left without looking back. He could only hope that Anders wouldn't do anything stupid that could get them both suspended or expelled; getting in trouble was one of his many talents, after all.
There was a lot of awkwardness once Fenris returned with food, too much awkwardness for his liking, but thankfully the cat distracted him from the thought of punching the mage in the face after he said, "You needn't buy me food," for the fifth time. They ate in comfortable silence, observing Pounce playing with a small toy mouse filled with catnip Anders also bought for him. One moment he was rolling around the floor like crazy, the next he ignored the toy only to attack it again two seconds later.
"I know I can't keep him. I've decided I'll give Ser Pounce to Aveline. She and Donnic have a nice house, Ser Pounce will like it there. If Aveline doesn't mind, that is."
Fenris looked at Anders, sensing a hint of sadness in his voice. Although the elf considered getting so attached to this creature stupid (to put it mildly), yet being so emotional over cats seemed like one of Anders' character traits. Every time one of the Hawkes mentioned getting a Mabari, he loudly complained about how slobbery dogs are, but when cats were concerned... Cats were like holy animals to him, even Fenris knew this.
"I'm sure she won't mind having a pet," words left his mouth before Fenris could think about them, and his ears turned pink. He didn't want to offer the mage comfort! It was just that Anders looked so miserable talking about giving this damned cat away; any other day Fenris would have enjoyed tormenting this man, but today was different for some reason.
Or maybe, he mused, glancing at Pounce that was now licking his paw pretending the mouse wasn't interesting. This cat is not that bad.
He wasn't going to admit he could not hate the cat, and began to like him a bit. Saying that out loud would be too much, especially in Anders' presence. Fenris had a reputation of an emotionless brooding guy to keep, after all.
"Thank you, Fenris."
The elf blinked when Anders interrupted his thoughts. He glared at the mage who had a look of determination on his face. His words, though soft, sounded more like a challenge.
"I didn't do it for– "
"I know, you didn't do it for me, but for Hawke," Anders rolled his eyes. "But still, thank you. Don't make me say it again, you bastard."
There was silence again; they watched the cat jumping on the mouse, purposely avoiding looking at each other.
"Forget about paying my debt."
Fenris risked a glance. Anders looked like the elf had just punched him in the head.
"I will do it!" He said firmly, his face getting red. "That was our deal. You helped me, so I'll shut up about mage rights and pay off your debt!"
"I will take care of my debts myself. Buy some cat food for this guy instead, and we're even."
Seeing Anders' expression, Fenris wanted to laugh. The mage stared at him, his mouth open, his eyes wide in shock (making Fenris notice that his eyes had the colour of honey, but that was just a silly little thought at the back of his head).
Anders cleared his throat, his gaze shifting to the cat once more. "I'm sure Ser Pounce would like to thank you as well, so I'll say it for him. Thank you."
Marian was always worried about them; Garett was, too, knowing they would surely kill each other if given the occassion. Yet, to Fenris' surprise, they spent a longer amount of time together, alone, without the Hawkes that were like a glue holding their little group together.
How... odd it was to spend time in the mage's company without the urge to strangle him with bare hands.
And how liberating.
Pounce raised his head, holding his toy firmly under his tiny paws. Fenris could have sworn the cat winked at him.
A/N2: Garett Hawke is a filthy memer.
A/N3: This is my first DA fic. Please let me know what you think.
