Author's notes: This is my entry for the Valentine's Day challenge! I hope I'll be able to finish it in time. I believe it will have just a few chapters, but still not sure about how many.
****SPOILER ALERT!****
I included spoilers to the chapter 8x15 'The comic book store regeneration', so if you don't want to get spoiled I suggest you wait it until it's aired before you read it. If you don't mind being spoiled, go on!
As usual, I own nothing. Neither Katy Perry's song.
Chapter 1 - Drawing straws
Penny drove fast through the streets of Pasadena heading to a clinic. She had an appointment with Dr. Sommer at 10 am and she woke up horribly late that day. Leonard tried to wake her up earlier, but she had a bad headache from the wine she drank the night before.
"Never buy cheap wine again. Never buy cheap wine again." She repeated to herself out loud. Buying wine at a gas station convenience store was not the best idea, she should have known.
"Oh, damn it, not another traffic light!" She stopped and watched the pedestrians slowly crossing in front of her car. She turned the radio on, searching for a station with something to ease her mind.
"Neil Diamond: nope! Ugh, Nirvana? No way!"
She skipped to another station until she found a song she finally liked.
"Cause I am a champion and you're gonna hear me roar! Oh oh oh oh oh oh"
She sang along, dancing with her head bouncing. That was exactly what she needed, a happy mindless cool song. By the end of the song the beautiful cheerful voice of the announcer made her smile. She always loved to hear his voice, she wondered if he was a tall and strong guy with good looks.
"Thanks for listening to MNAST! Gooood Gooood Goood morning everyone! That was Katy Perry with 'Roar'! Wanna hear me roar? ROOOOAAARRRRR..."
"Hmmmm... Roooarrr indeed!"
"Claudy, tell us what we have for our listeners this morning!"
"Alright, Jeff! Today we are giving a roooomantic Valentine's day trip to A-A-Aspen!"
"Cool! And how many couples will take this trip?"
"I'm glad you asked! Four couples will enjoy the romance, ski and wine for freeeeee!"
"Wine for free? I'm in!" She yelled, just as she stopped at another traffic light.
"And what do our listeners need to do to win this trip?"
"They just have to call us at (speaking together) 321-MNAST (back to Claudy) and answer our Katy Perry Quizzzzzz! If you got all the answers right you can be one of the winners!"
"Oh my God! That's so easy! I need to win this trip! It's perfect!" Penny quickly dialed the number and turned her phone to the speaker, just in time before the she kept on driving to the clinic.
The four friends were having breakfast in the cafeteria at Caltech.
"So, are you planning what to do on Valentine's Day?"
"It's still three weeks away, Raj!" Sheldon observed.
"I don't know about you, but I have big plans with Emily!"
"Does she know that already?" Howard asked him, knowing he was probably planning something astronomical.
"No... But I'm sure she'll love it!"
"And what are you planning to do?" Leonard asked.
"I booked a honeymoon suite at a fancy hotel in Vegas for the weekend!"
"Honeymoon suite? But you're not getting married! Or are you?" Sheldon asked, confused.
"Yeah, dude, not cool." Leonard replied. "Believe me, it's not a good idea to propose after sex."
Raj gulped. He really hadn't thought that through, he was just seeing the romantic side of it.
"Yeah, I guess you're right... I'll cancel the reservations..." He said, disappointed.
"What about you, Leonard?" Howard asked.
"I don't know, Penny asked to leave Valentine's day on her this year. She said she would do something special for us... It will probably involve just wine and sex."
"Just wine and sex? Yeah, how miserable you are!"
Sheldon scoffed.
"What?"
"Howard, Leonard loves to have wine and sex with Penny, he will not be miserable at all!"
"Yeah... Right, Sheldon, silly me!" Everyone rolled their eyes at Sheldon's lack of understanding of sarcasm.
"And by the way, you can't expect other than a frivolous and witless plan from Penny. Just the opposite of what I have planned for Amy and I. A sensible and imaginative arrangement."
"Really? What have you arranged?"
"That's absolutely none of your business!"
"Nevermind. How about you, Howard?"
"Well... I was hoping I could ride the wave of one of you guys... I really have nothing planned since my mom died."
"Gee, dude, I'm sorry, maybe we can do something together. You're my best friend and I won't leave you alone in that."
"Yeah, Howard, count me in. If Penny and I can do something for you we will."
They all looked at Sheldon, who didn't say anything.
"What? Oh... No, I can't share what we're doing with Howard, even though I honestly have a fellow feeling for your loss. Now if you excuse me I have important discoveries to make in the name of science." He stood up with his tray and left, leaving the three friends flabbergasted at the table.
"Hey Amy!"
"Bernie! What a nice surprise! I was not expecting you in my lab!"
"I thought I could stop by and have lunch with you, maybe we could talk a little, is it ok? It's been tough since Howie's mom died." She placed a few bags on her table.
"Sure! Let me just text Sheldon and tell him I'm having lunch with you instead."
"Is it really ok? I didn't mean to spoil your lunch time with Sheldon."
"No, that's ok, we've been eating together everyday for over three weeks."
"Wow, I didn't know you were getting so close lately."
"Yeah, ever since Christmas he's been much kinder to me, I guess Meemaw cookies really worked!" She winked at Bernie.
"Yeah, you're welcome by the way." She winked back at Amy.
"And if you can provide me a bit more of that special sugar I can prepare something for Valentine's day as well!"
"Sure! Don't forget to limit the dose to half a teaspoon!"
"Of course." Amy gave her a convincing smile.
The two friends sat together at her lab and started eating the sandwiches Bernadette brought.
"I guess you're not in the mood for Valentine's Day, right?"
"Yeah, I'm trying not to press Howard to do anything, with his mother's death I believe the best will be for us to stay home and have a quiet dinner."
"Poor Howard, I wish I could do something to make him feel better.
"He's devastated. It was terrible to go through his mother's things at her house last week."
"Yeah, I remember going through our cousins things after their accident, I could salvage a lot of clothes though."
"Well, I don't think anybody would fit his mother's clothes anyway. Howard wanted to bring home his mother's clowns, can you believe it? Those things are creepy!"
"Err... Poor Howie, it's really hard to lose someone so close."
"Yeah... But enough talking about me! Tell me, how are your plans for Valentine's day?"
"Well, in fact Sheldon is making the plans this year."
"Really? Did you trust him that? You know you'll be playing videogames and watch Star Trek all night, right?"
"Yeah, I do... But if this is what he wants to do I'll be happy just to be with him."
"Yeah... That's what love is about..." She rolled her eyes.
"Sure."
"AMY!"
"What?"
"You can't let him do that to you again! I remember last year at the train, you deserve a romantic Valentine's day!"
"But it was romantic in the end, he kissed me!"
"Yeah, but it's been a year ago, what do you expect, a crappy day with a simple kiss in the end?"
"Maybe..."
"I'm not taking that crap again! I'm gonna have a little talk with that guy!" Bernie stood up and left Amy alone in the lab.
"Sheldon, what an honor to have you having lunch with us for a change!"
"Howard, gentlemen." He nodded. "Amy is having lunch with Bernadette today and she dismissed my company." He sat quietly at the table with his friends.
"Bernie's here? She didn't tell me that! Why isn't she having lunch with me?"
"I don't know, Howard, maybe she prefers Amy's company to yours, as apparently Amy prefers hers over mine." Sheldon answered, his voice revealing a bit of grief he tried to hide.
They ate quietly at the table, when suddenly an ear-splitting voice startled them.
"So, Mr. I-don't-do-romance, I heard you're planning a crappy Valentine's day for Amy!"
Sheldon stared at her with wide eyes.
"W-What?"
She looked at Howard with lovely eyes and greeted him with a sweet voice. "Hello, Howie." Then she turned again to Sheldon.
"I'm not going to see you breaking her heart two years in a row, mister! You'd better have something romantic as hell to offer her this year or you'll have to face my wrath!"
Sheldon gulped, looking smaller than her.
"Yes, ma'am."
"You heard me!" She turned to give Howard a quick peck on the lips and left the cafeteria.
Penny stopped at a Starbucks to get a cup of coffee and something quick to eat. She was still behind schedule, and she had to visit three more customers in the afternoon to compensate her delay. As she entered her car again, she turned the radio on, anxiously waiting for the result of the Katy Perry quiz she took that morning. She really wanted to win that trip, it was very romantic and Leonard would certainly love it, and the best part she would be able to take all her friends with her... And Emily. But she could make an effort if that would make Leonard happy.
"And that was Black Eyed Peas with 'I gotta feeeeeeling' at MNAST! And tonight's gonna be a good night! Yeah, at least for the winner of our Katy Perry Quizzzz! Let's find out who were the two lucky bastards who will be in A-A-Aspeeeen for Valentine's Day! Tell us, Claudy, who are them?"
"It's me! It's me! It's me!"
"All right, Jeff! The winners are buzzzzzzzzz bip blip buzzzz bzzzzzzzzzzz..."
"Nooooooooo! I can't believe it!" Penny turned off the radio and picked up her phone and dialed the station right away.
"MNAST."
"Hello, this is Penny speaking, I need to know the result of the Katy Perry quiz, there was interference in my radio just when they were announcing it!"
"The winners are Audrey Mohoganny and Penelop-"
"It's me! It's me! I can't believe I won it! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
"Miss, please can you confirm your full name and phone number?"
"Of course! Anything you need!"
After Bernadette left the cafeteria, the guys were stunned for a moment.
"What was that all about?" Raj asked. "Did you do anything wrong, Sheldon?"
"Not that I know! But apparently Bernadette underestimates my capacity of planning an adequate Valentine's day for Amy..."
"Really? That's preposterous!" Leonard exclaimed, with a little smirk on his face.
"Exactly! I have an IQ of 187! I'm perfectly capable of planning something as mundane as Valentine's Day!"
"Of course you are!" Leonard held a laugh and kept on eating.
"At least she's not mad at me!" Howard claimed.
"Speaking of Valentine's Day, I thought about something else to do with Emily."
Right at that moment, Leonard's phone started ringing.
"Excuse me guys, hold on a moment." He picked up his phone from his pocket, and saw it was Penny.
"Hey, Penny, what's up?"
"LEONARD! I WON!" He heard her yelling at the phone, automatically pulling it away from his ear. He slowly placed it back on his hear.
"Penny, what did you win?"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" He pull it away again.
"Stop screaming, Penny, you're going to make me deaf!"
"Sorry, sweetie, it's just that I'm so excited!"
"Alright, won't tell me why?"
"I won a trip to Aspen for Valentine's Day! For eight! Can you believe it? IT'S AMAZING!"
"What, really? That's great!" He smiled at all the guys, who were looking at him, puzzled.
"I answered a quiz about Katy Perry and I won! Can you believe they asked silly stuff as her star sign? Who doesn't know she's a Scorpio?"
"Yeah, right, such an obvious question!"
"I'm going to the station before I go home to pick up the tickets! I'm so excited! I want everybody at 4A for dinner so we can discuss all the details for the trip! I'm so excited!"
"All right, I'll tell everyone, I'm sure they'll be there! Love ya, bye!"
Leonard put away the phone and had a big grin on his face.
"What happened dude, we're curious as hell here!"
"Penny won us all a trip to Aspen for Valentine's day!"
"Wow! That's so romantic! Emily will love it! It's even better than going skinny dipping in my building's swimming pool filled with rose petals!"
"Really? That was your plan?" Leonard looked at him with a scrunchy face.
"Amy and I are not going."
"Wha-wha-what? Why not?
"I have a full weekend planned for us, and there's no way we're going to indulge into a life-threatening activity such as skiing or snowboarding or freeze to death in a hotel in the middle of blizzards and avalanches!"
Everybody rolled their eyes, but soon enough they realize it would be great to be there without Sheldon.
"Oh, buddy, don't worry, you don't have to be there."
"Yeah, you would freeze to death, I don't want you to die... soon."
"Yeah, and Amy doesn't deserve romance anyway."
Sheldon looked at them with a wary face.
"Why are you suddenly trying to convince me not to go?"
"What? No!"
"Of course not! We really want you there"
"Yeah, we can't live without you."
"I knew it. You can't go there without me. I'm in. By the way, I saw you all rolling your eyes at me."
"Pizza's here!" Leonard arrived home, carrying a pile of boxes and placed them on the coffee table. Everybody was already there, except for Penny, and they were all excited, talking about the trip.
"Oh, Sheldon, I'm so glad you're excited about the trip."
"Of course I am, Amy, even though I already had great ROMANTIC plans for us." He replied, looking at Bernadette.
"Really? Were you planning something romantic?"
"Of course, Amy, you deserve that."
"I thought you hated romance."
"I do, but not with the woman I love." He smiled at her, giving a little squeeze at her hand.
"Ohhhh dude, that's so sweet!" Raj exclaimed, bringing Emily closer to him and gladly receiving a kiss on his cheek.
"Too bad we won't go skinny dipping anymore, I was really excited about that." She said to him, who gave her a lovely kiss on the lips in return.
At that moment the door opened, revealing a not so excited Penny.
"Hey guys."
"Are you ok, Penny?" Leonard stood up and walked towards her.
"Guys, you're gonna kill me." She looked at the gang, with a pouting face.
"What happened?"
"I thought I won a trip for 4 couples, but in fact they gave two trips for 2 couples each, and I was one of the winners, so I've got just 4 tickets."
"Oh, Bestie, it's ok, you're still going on the trip!"
"Yeah, but I wanted all of you guys with us, I don't want to choose."
"Maybe we could all go together, let's see if the hotel has rooms available and we can still go!"
"No, I have already done that. I called the hotel and they are fully booked, because there's a convention of something I didn't understand there and all the other hotels in town are also full. Sorry!"
"Well, no problem, just pick any of us and the others will understand." Amy said, receiving death ray glares from the other couples.
"Yeah, you say that because you're her best friend and she will obviously pick you!" Bernie answered.
"No, guys, please don't fight over that. I thought of a way we can make a fair choice. We can play a game and the winners got to go with us!"
"A game? But what kind of game? Which would be the rules to that? And how can we decide if there is a tie? And what if the winners are not a couple, like me and Raj? And what if-"
"Sheldon!" Penny interrupted. "I was thinking about drawing straws, but if you have a better idea we could try!"
"Drawing straws? Is that your great idea?"
She crossed her arms and stared at him. "What do you suggest so?"
Amy pinched him in the arm, so he wouldn't start it all over again. "Ouch!"
"Let's do that so, Bestie, is everybody in?"
Everybody nodded, and after rolling his eyes Sheldon nodded as well.
"Great, I already have the straws here! Let's have the boys pick them up."
She offered her hand with the straws to Howard, who picked one, followed by Raj and Sheldon. "Alright, let's compare the sticks!"
"Oh! I can't believe I won! It's going to be so romantic!" Raj kissed Emily, and Penny tried to hide her disappointment. 'Oh crap, not Emily!' she thought, she really didn't want to travel with her.
Everybody tried to hide their disappointment of not going on the trip, except for Sheldon. He was actually happy he would be able to put his original plan into action.
"Hey, Leonard, remember when I went on Valentine's Day with you to see the Hadron Collider at CERN? Isn't it amazing, we'll be repeating the experience!"
"Yeah, Raj, that will be great." He replied, not so excited.
At that Sheldon remembered that failure of a trip when he got sick because of Penny's germs.
"Yeah, apparently we have to thank Penny again for that!" He scoffed.
They all started eating, and before they left, Emily and Raj thanked Penny again for the trip.
"Thanks for the opportunity, Penny." Emily said.
"Yeah, I'll love to travel with you!"
The couple left the apartment, and as they were approaching Raj's car, Emily turned to him and confessed.
"I don't want to go, Raj, not with Penny!"
"But Emily, Leonard and Penny are my friends, and we won! We just can't not go!"
"But Raj! I don't get along with her! I think she hates me!"
"She doesn't hate you, sweetheart! And it will be a great opportunity for you girls to get to know each other better!"
Emily looked at him, how could she not love that optimistic and sweet Indian? "All right, then, we're going."
At 4A, Sheldon was preparing two mugs of tea while Amy sat at the island, watching him work.
"So, Sheldon, what are your plans for our Valentine's day?"
"Oh, I can't tell you yet."
"Are you going to surprise me?" She asked, excited.
"Even though I hate surprises, it will be appropriated in this situation."
"Ohh Sheldon, I don't know what it is, but it's already romantic!"
"See? I'm perfectly able to plan a romantic day. Don't forget to tell Bernadette that."
"How could you lose in 'Draw straws'?"
"Bernie, how could I know which would be the short one?" She looked at him and shoot a death stare.
"Keep driving, Howie, keep driving."
After a while of silence, he tried to speak again.
"Are you still mad at me for losing the trip? You know, I'm losing so much lately. I've just lost my mother." He looked at her with watery eyes.
"No, I'm not mad at you anymore. It's ok we didn't get to travel to Aspen... We can still be together at home. Will you cook for me?"
"Sure honey. I can prepare brisket, just like my mom used to make." And with that a tear dropped from his eye.
"Oh, Howie, forget it, I can do the cooking."
"No, that's not necessary, I can cook, my mom taught me." Now tears were dropping even more.
"Stop the car, Howie, let me drive."
"If you insist so." He stopped the car at the side of the street, exchanging places with Bernadette.
"Oh, my rocket man, don't worry, I'll take good care of you."
"Thanks, ma- Ma Bernadette!" And tears fell all over again.
Back at 4B, Penny was immersing herself again in a glass of wine.
"Penny, do you want to wake up again with a headache?"
"No, Leonard, but after tonight I really need it."
"Come on, it's not that bad to travel with Raj."
"Raj's not the problem, sweetie. Emily hates me!"
"No, she doesn't."
"Yes, she does!"
"No, she doesn't!"
"Leonard! That girl hated me ever since we met! Now our romantic trip will be transformed into awkward silence and weird dinners together!
He grabbed her by her waist, placing her glass on the counter. "Relax, ok, don't forget I'm a romance ninja, I won't let anybody ruin our Valentine's day."
"Hmmm... Thanks, my hero!"
She kissed him while they walked towards her bedroom.
A/N: Thanks a lot for reading, guys! I hope you enjoyed it, and well, let's see how Penny and Emily will get along in a trip together. What do you think Sheldon is preparing for Amy?
And sorry to add the sad part of Mrs. Wolowitz death, I just couldn't leave it off. Feel free to review if you like! I'll love to read your thoughts on this story!
