Versatility
A/N: I forced Fallacy to make me a prompt so I could write something. Funny thing is, it's only easy for me to write after someone else gives me an idea, and it's easy for me to come up with great ideas for other people. WHY, BRAIN, WHY.
He was one persistent son of a bitch.
From the very first day, from the very first time he came, it was the same—every morning, every afternoon—until it became so regular that Sakura gave it a name. She liked to call it The Great Debate. Not even slightly creative, but closest to the truth.
The first time they were all together, it went something like this:
In the morning, she'd find Lee out in the training fields and persuade him to stop fighting imaginary demons and talk to her about the topic of the day, whatever Sakura decided that might be. She would tug at his arm, coax and cajole him to have brunch with her, and he would pretend reluctance for a moment before giving in and trailing behind her to the café of the day, where they would order hot tea and sweet buns and extend upon the topic of the day.
That first day, it was capillary action. An animated Sakura explained to a very polite (and secretly bored) Lee—waving arms and all—about the wonders of capillary action, that if it didn't exist, the human body would experience difficulty in hauling blood to the numerous, tinier blood vessels in the human body. Plants, as well, which depend on capillary action to transport nutrients through the xylem. Lee smiled and hummed, stirring his tea thoughtfully.
And then she saw him.
Her stomach sank at the sight of his bouncing, blond topknot, his slouched, smug expression, and his predatory glare, directed precisely into her retina. Sakura trailed off at discussing the vacuum effect when he stopped in the middle of the street, made a perfectly ninety-degree turn to his right, and stormed right into the café, hands shoved in his pockets moodily.
By this time, Lee had noticed Sakura's discomfort and turned in his seat just as the source of said discomfort snatched an unused chair and pulled it up to their table in a no-nonsense manner. He sat in the chair and folded his arms with a huff, staring at the ceiling as if all this were such an inconvenience to him. Which it was. Sakura shifted in her seat and picked at her knees a bit, staring at the table as if all this were such an embarrassment to her. Which it was.
And Lee settled for alternately staring at both of them.
They sat like that for ten minutes before someone exhibited the graciousness of breaking the silence.
"Lee," Sakura began slowly, determined to keep her eyes on Lee and not on the man to her right, who was glaring at her. "This is—"
"Deidara. I know. Weren't you supposed to be…?" Lee trailed off uncertainly.
"I was supposed to give him the checkup again today, yes."
"I wouldn't have minded putting lunch off until later, you know."
"Well, I really didn't want to go in there today."
"Why, is the building cold or something?"
Sakura snorted. "It's that guy." She jerked her head at Deidara, who sneered back flirtatiously, if such an expression even existed.
Lee frowned. "Is he bothering you, Sakura?"
"I'm sitting right here, assholes. You could do me the favor of acting like it, yeah. I fucking hate being ignored." Deidara sunk down in his chair moodily.
"Lee, you wouldn't believe the things he says to me. It's so infuriating, and immature, and cliché, my God. I mean, yesterday was the last I could take. All I said was…"
"Okay, let's just get this over with so I don't have to sit here with you any longer than is absolutely necessary."
"I'm off house arrest now. They're finally realizing they need my talent to win the war, yeah. It's what they said, anyway. Will probably kill me the second everything's over."
"Oh, joy. Take off your shirt now so I can feel you…r ribs. I—I think they were broken—dammit. Stop laughing at me, dickhead!"
"My, my. I never knew you felt that way."
"Shut the fuck up. Take off your shirt."
"We should've ditched everyone and ran off together back at the humongous Gaara scandal, yeah."
"I don't want to be reminded of that, you sick freak. … Fine, I'm taking it off myself."
"Mmph—seriously, we could've had offspring by now, huh?"
"Wouldn't you eat your own offspring? Stop talking to me so I can check out your eyes."
"You could just gaze into them all day, yeah. Ow, bitch, that's my sensitive one!"
"Ugh, fine. It's all fine. You're done. Hey, guys, he's ready to go back in the room!"
"What, I don't get a dick exam? Woah, slapping is out of control, yeah."
"Well…" Lee blanched nervously and leaned back in his chair. "It kind of sounds like both of you initiated it, not just him. I mean—"
"Lee!"
Deidara snickered.
"—as much as I want to agree with you, Sakura darling, what you told me speaks otherwise. Maybe you should ask Tsunade to take a different assignment. I'm sure she'd let you switch, since you asked for it in the first place…"
"Wait, wait." Deidara narrowed his eyes at Lee. "'Darling'? The fuck? Bitch, you told me you were single. And as for asking to be my daily eye candy, all I have to say about that is you must be a flaming whore, to shamelessly lead two guys on like you apparently are, yeah."
Lee sputtered indignantly. Sakura did, too. So did the waitress, but only because she choked on her gum.
"Listen," Sakura snarled at the blond. "I am single. Lee and I are just friends." At this, Lee's facial expression sank, while Deidara's appeared nearly triumphant. "And as for the asking, it was to find shit out about the Akatsuki, you bastard. The more I know about them, the closer I am to getting Sasuke back where he belongs." Deidara's mood immediately joined Lee's, currently chilling in the outer core layer of the earth.
That was the first time. It was mostly Sakura doing all the work, but as she soon found out—courtesy of past routine and a newly-granted freedom, respectively to both men—they weren't about to give up on her anytime soon.
The twenty-second time they were all together, it went something like this.
"So that's why you should go out with me sometime, yeah. You need a real man to keep you company, not some weirdo. It's hardly fair to uphold a bias like this."
"Okay, Deidara, first of all, I've known Lee longer, and you—"
"Who are you calling a weirdo, Deidara? Have you taken a look at your hands recently? I have been in love with Sakura from the first day I met her, my rival, and am therefore significantly more qualified to win her heart." Lee clenched his teeth, frustrated.
"Look," Deidara narrowed his eyes. "I don't give a shit, but I just don't think you're the one for her."
"And you'd know all about that," Sakura sighed and fell silent, having learned in the past that these spats were best left alone until burnt out.
"Precisely, yeah. Lee, you're a crazy little freak-out. That's just the end of it."
"What I want to know is why you care so much," Lee grouched. "You've never answered that question directly, you know."
"And I don't have to, see? Freedom of spitefulness. It's a law, yeah." Deidara smirked.
"You are an idiot."
"And both of you are acting like little boys. Check, please!"
"What, you're leaving already? Damn, what did I do this time?"
"Sakura, don't leave! I am sorry for my childishness! If I do not act more cordially the next time we meet, I will—!"
"Augh! No, Lee! No. I just have something I need to do…"
"May I help you with it?"
"…something personal."
"I can close my eyes!"
"She's ditching you, loser. Just like I said last time, yeah."
"You be quiet! Sakura would never be so rude! She loves me; she just doesn't show it yet!"
"Yeah, she loves you like she loves me."
Lee gasped. "A direct challenge!" The bushy-browed suitor whipped an index finger toward his publicly mortified holy grail. "Sakura! My love! Who is it you love the most?"
Deidara raised an eyebrow at the stuttering pink-haired girl.
Of course the only reasonable thing to do was scurry out of the café as fast as possible.
The first time Sakura started to love him, it went something like this:
An arm curled around her waist with bruising strength while the other snaked down her body and grabbed her ankle, yanking hard. Sakura clenched the appendage tightly, surely drawing blood, as the piece of her boot tore away from the segment of exposed pipe it had caught on to, washing away down the river. She kicked, chest burning for air, grateful when the second arm curled wrapped around her legs and brought her to the surface.
Gasping and wheezing, Sakura sucked wonderful oxygen into her lungs over and over again, her consciousness clinging to the masculine voice berating her for diving down alone and would you please tell people where you're going for once, dwindling away before a hand replaced it, rubbing her back soothingly as she regurgitated the last of the fish-flavored water. The disheveled kunoichi coughed a couple more times for good measure, panted for a minute or two, and then turned to meet her savior, promising to them out loud that she'd kiss the hell out of them for saving her life.
Sakura avoided Deidara for the next week.
The first time Sakura knew she loved him, it went something like this:
"Lee…I really think I do like him, you know?"
Lee sighed.
"Is…is it bad, do you think? I mean, because of his past and everything. It's probably not good to make friends who are so…criminally…able."
"Do you love him?"
"Huh?"
"Do you?"
"I…" If she said it, would it make it true?
"Yes. Yes, I do." Was it a lie to keep her heart safe?
Sometimes all you needed to do was realize the truth yourself. So maybe this was a head start.
Surprisingly enough, Lee said nothing, only nodded thoughtfully.
The twenty-third time they were all together, it went something like this:
"So, Sakura, what about that kiss you promised me, yeah? I'm not exactly a patient man."
Deidara glanced surreptitiously at Lee; Sakura knew he was only trying to egg him on, typical Deidara-style.
But Lee wouldn't be baited today.
"Sakura already told me about that." And to Sakura's surprise, Lee managed to grin furtively. "She told me other things, as well. She tells me everything, you know. If you only knew…"
Deidara snarled. "And what the fuck is that supposed to mean, yeah?"
"It only means what it implies. What do you think it means?"
Oh, how the tables turned. And, typical Deidara-style, the blond took the bait. He whipped his head around to face Sakura.
"What the hell is that weirdo talking about, huh? What have you been doing all this time? Is this just a game?"
Yes. Yes, it is, and I feel so terrible when I force myself to see that.
"Deidara, no. I'm not—"
"If that's it, I might as well just leave this damn town, because you're the only reason I—"
Deidara and Sakura simultaneously froze, blinking at each other once before looking anywhere and everywhere that wasn't each other.
"She told me she loved you, Deidara. Maybe you should think about that."
Did Lee just like having the upper hand, even if it meant sacrificing his love?
A cloud of jealousy lingered between the two men long after Lee returned to the training grounds.
The twenty-fourth time they were all together, it went something like this:
Sakura sat in the pulled-up chair this time, with Deidara and Lee sitting opposite each other in the booth seats, avoiding each other's gaze for the same reasons. She looked at both of them, tension skyrocketing since they all arrived five minutes ago, and decided that something had to be done right away.
"Look, you guys," Sakura began, wincing at the irritated tone to her voice. "I'm not going to sit here and pretend nothing's wrong. I—you—"
"It's okay."
Sakura's blood turned to ice for a fraction of a second, she was so startled. No…
"Lee?"
"It's okay. I understand."
Feeling wretched but unable to summon the will to argue—because she understood—Sakura watched Lee give her a sad sort of smile, stand, and leave the café quietly. She wouldn't see him for nearly a year after that while he avoided her every attempt to find him; after a while she stopped searching, because the heartache wasn't worth it. Moving on was acceptable. This wasn't a game anymore.
It was okay.
Oooo
The first time they had a dinner date, it went something like this:
Sakura and Deidara walked to the precipice on top of the Hokage faces, decided it was too cold and windy, and walked back down.
They walked into the training grounds, but ANBU training was going on in Sakura's favorite spot, so they left.
They skirted across town to the Ramen place, which was closed.
It started to rain, so they went to Sakura's apartment, she made pigs in a blanket, and they sat in the middle of her living room floor.
"Well," Sakura sighed with a full mouth of hot dog. "We just wasted half a day looking for someplace to eat. Should've just came here first, I guess."
"But you never know, yeah. Besides, it was nice walking around all day. Exercise, sunshine…"
"Oh, shut up. You complained the whole time."
"I prefer to call it critiquing."
"Mustard?"
"Yeah, a little bit right there."
"I always liked ketchup better."
"I only put ketchup on my macaroni and cheese, actually."
"Weird."
The dough-covered hot dogs were gobbled down in no time, and soon Deidara and Sakura found themselves sitting on the floor just staring at each other, wondering if the other was bored, and if there was something somebody was supposed to be saying. After a while, the silence lapsed into a comfortable lull, and soon after that, they fell half-asleep leaning on each other, breathing deep and slow.
Hours later, when Sakura awoke, she found herself in an uncomfortable predicament just waiting to happen. Honestly, she'd just tried to climb over the guy and get a glass of water when something poked into her stomach. It was—well, Deidara's—it was a little bit—should she tell him, or—? Deidara stirred and looked up at Sakura, tracing her line of sight to his pants.
"Oh."
"Does that...happen a lot?"
Deidara blinked, not embarrassed in the slightest.
"Yeah. Yeah, it kind of does."
"Oh…oh, okay."
Sakura stood up and got her glass of water.
The first time he saw her naked, it went something like this:
Sakura tilted her head up into the shower spray, relaxing under the steaming effects of the cascading water. Deidara, Tsunade, Naruto, and everyone else might squeeze every waking moment she had spare out of her schedule, but this was all her own.
"Hey, you said we would have breakfast together. Are you going to come, or what?"
"Huh?"
Sakura whipped around with chakra spiking madly, then immediately wished she hadn't.
Because there, holding the shower curtain open all calm as you please, stood Deidara, in the flesh, glowering straight at her as if he had the right to break into someone's house demanding they stick to a schedule. The thing was, he didn't even try to stare at anything, which is what made the whole thing worse. Then Sakura might have had an excuse to knock him all the way to the front gates.
But no, he just stood there and waited for an answer. She crossed her arms over her chest and turned around modestly. And there he appeared at the other end. Okay, this was getting ridiculous now.
"Deidara, I'll be out in a minute, okay? Now get the fuck out of my bathroom."
"Fine. I'll be in the living room."
His intruding form disappeared in shadowy leaps through the plastic shower curtain and Sakura reached for the shampoo, hands shaking uncontrollably.
That was then, and this is now:
This is the last time they will all be together, for now. Lee goes on missions nearly every day; Sakura sees little of him as a result of his talent. Sakura works at the hospital and she, too, finds herself burdened by missions; her dulled hair and general unkempt appearance represent this in the least attractive way possible. And Deidara just darts from place to place, sometimes he stays in Konoha, and sometimes he wanders the Fire country, looking for his niche; Tsunade has given up controlling him totally, and he's safe as long as he doesn't do anything crazy.
And yet, all of them found the time to come together this one time. They don't say much, just chat about the weather, missions, hair care (albeit jokingly). It's as if they're all casual friends, as if nothing has happened to allow them to drift apart.
For Deidara and Sakura, it's different. They see each other a lot, but they're not friends, not in the conventional sense of the term. Sometimes he stays with her at her apartment for days before he takes off on a bird again, flying to some godforsaken place. Sakura has to smile, though; it's so Deidara, so unpredictable that her heart flutters every time she sees him. She wonders if everyone feels the same about their special person.
Sakura and Lee have become close friends, the type that can be away from each other for ages and pick up immediately from the last meeting, never again discussing the trivial things that acquaintances bore each other with; Lee still flirts, and Sakura still playfully rejects. It's a game again, and she loves it.
Deidara and Lee…well, they were never really friends at all, according to each of them. Deidara refuses to discuss the matter, his childish petulance clinging to his conscious like a barnacle, and the blond will always be an Eternal Rival to Lee, anyhow.
She knows. The thing that brought everyone back together, that is. Because this isn't just a chance meeting, it's sort of a party, one without any prior invitations or even acknowledgement. She knows Deidara knows, of course, and Lee most definitely, but maybe it's just her party, just what she wants to believe, to see. The old habits of perception are hard to break. There's no balloons, no screaming woman, and Sakura thinks this just might be the worst baby shower in the history of mankind.
It's all right, though, because she smiles and sips her tea, laughing at a joke Lee tells, enjoying the sparkle in his eyes, turning to Deidara, rubbing his arm and relishing the small smile he throws her. It's so normal, so quiet. Sakura puts her hands on her belly and soaks in the warmth seeping through her thin t-shirt, feeling for the glimmer of life below. He turns once, then settles again.
They're watching her, each with his own brand of silence. The moment stretches on, the pause in reality; Sakura hums. She does that a lot these days.
The silence dissipates gracefully, and Lee and Deidara resume their bantering without a hitch. Sakura smiles again brightly, but not because of them this time, or even because of her own private musings. Sometimes she just smiles for the sake of it, brightening pieces of life everywhere she goes, enjoying the manipulation she imposes on other people from her radiance; it's nice to know you have the power to change a person's life with a single word.
Things have gotten too serious recently, Sakura decides. Perhaps a vacation is in order, or maybe they can try the Hokage-mountain picnic once more, just to see if the winds have died down (they never do). She stares out the window, now, pondering the cleaning due to her kitchen, observing the dense clouds far in the distance, spreading their fingertips like icy tendrils toward the town below. The winter rains will come soon.
Maybe they'd better hold the picnic off a couple months. Sakura could wait a couple months. It was okay.
Versatility, after all, was a skill of hers.
