Entry one:
Dear diary or journal or whatever you are.
Is it wrong to be this frustrated? I mean is it okay for me to get this over heated, this pissed? All I ever hear is how I'm a failure. How I'll never be like Miku. But I don't wanna be like Miku. I was created to be my own self wasn't I? I am just a failure. Only person who likes is me is Masuta's boyfriend and I think he just likes staring at my boobs.
Today I was trying to practice in the sound booth, it's so soft and it's got a dash of purple and sliver on the couch where I was sitting when Miku rushed in. It was my turn to record but oh no. Little Miss Perfect got more attention than I did. She said she figured out the new songs Masuta created for her. Honestly she sounds like a chipmunk when she sings. In my opinion she does at least. But then I was trying to say it was my turn. Masuta turned and told me to get out.
I walked out slowly, closing the door and hanging my head. I went down to the kitchen for a drink when Kaito and Masuta's boyfriend walked in they seemed pretty happy so I left quickly. Or at least tried. Kaito looked at me trying to figure out what was wrong. I nodded to where the music was coming from. He nodded slowly and allowed me to leave so here I am now, writing in you, drink in my hand, laying on my bed, while Miss Oh So Perfect Miku gets to sing all day long and I barely get practice time. I feel like Masuta loves her more than any of us. It's so stupid!
Sure I came in last. Sure, I'm an alcoholic but really? Giving one more attention than others? I call favoritism. Oh right. No one listens. I mean I do get all the old unused songs anyways so why should I bother talking. Should I even talk? Should I even sing? I just don't give a damn anymore. Fuck it. I'm going to watch T.V. Bye Diary.
~Haku.
